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I am new to this site and this is my first question I post so please bear with me and hopefully I can get some great advice.
I am a big guy (don't think fat). I am well over 6 feet tall and while not overly muscular, have big shoulders and weigh in over 230 lbs. For my height I am actually pretty skinny but I wanted to give an image. I also shave my head thanks to premature baldness.
Something I have noticed, and proven over and over, is that women I meet for the first time are usually intimidated by me. I have a great friend and wing man who is actually the same height and size and we have discussed this several times.
We have noticed that our shorter, skinnier friends have a lot more success at first time meetings than we do, surprisingly the smaller the guy, the more success they have. If we are in a bar or nightclub, regardless of the approach or situation, women seem to be hesitant of our approach based off of our size. Unfortunately, we usually tower over women and are twice their size. It may seem like all women love tall, strong men, but in the initial phase not so much.
Women who I have become involved with commonly say they were very intimidated of me at first because I was a "big, scary guy".
On the other hand, we (both) routinely attract larger women. It's as if I am a Big girl magnet, we think it's because we make them feel small for once. (I know that sounds bad but it's the best reasoning we have come up with)
My first question to this community is how to get past the initial physical presence and make a connection. Does anyone have advice on approach and introduction without overwhelming the target? Especially the thin / fit women who I know are half the size of me! How can I use this to my advantage?
every other post on this site is guys complaining girls are scared/intimidated of them.. you just PERSONALIZING the behavior of women towards people who approach them.. it's natural to feel anxious and scared and push the person who approaches you away.. women do it all the time and dont think about it.. if anything a guy who is bigger is MORE Attractive to women because they always talk about taller guys..
try dressing a PINK SHIRT a TIE or some slightly feminine colors, but stylish and expensive and not gay.. if you are big muscular fellow you can pull off a pink shirt or something slightly feminine and it might soften you up without making you look flamboyant/gay. (nothing wrong with being gay of course, just saying in terms ppl's assumptions about clothing..)
wear a hat.. go to a dance class. you will naturally start to move in a less intimidating way after you take dance classes for a few months.. but again, you are taking something that happens to most guys and making the assumption that it only happens to you because you are bigger.