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The sad fact of the matter is that a large number of women nowadays have grown up in abusive households or at some point in their lives have had a negative male figure in their lives. They unfortunately learn unhealthy behavioral patterns and are consequently drawn to men who are assholes and jerks. Part of this also comes from the fact that their self-esteems are incredibly low and on some level they believe they deserve to be treated disrespectfully. This is also very common with women who grew up without any father figure in their lives at all, as they have no concept of how a man should treat a woman and therefore will accept any SPAM, coupled with the fact they have a psychological need for any and all male affection even if it's negative.
These women have deep seeded psychological issues and unfortunately they are inherently drawn toward assholes and jerks. Therefore many man exploit this unhealthy trend in modern society to get laid. And still other men exploit this fact to get rich, by telling desperate men how to exploit unhealthy women (Tom Leykis comes to mind). Unfortunately these entrepreneurs advocate unhealthy ways of getting female attention, rather than focusing upon self-improvement as the pua community does. Unfortunately most people lump the pua community in with these vultures rather than understanding we are the exact opposite.
This is how I used to think. Unfortunately it is a clump of half truths that protect one from looking at the real deep truth which is painfull for most people.
The deep truth is that there is a dark side to human nature that exists to a certain extent in every human being. In the majority of women this could be referred to as the "dark feminine". I got that term from a book called "the way of the superior man" by David Deida.
The majority of women(I would say all of the heterosexual ones) have a "dark feminine" aspect, even if they don't show it. This is the aspect that responds to "negs", assholes, jerks, domination, humiliation, and pain. This is why women are fascinated by serial killers and vampires and "bad boys". This is what women are referring to when they say they want a "real man". "real man" is a code word for a man who satisfies her deep sexual urges that no "nice guy" will ever be able to satisfy.
bad boy or alpha male = "real man" = full sexual release
nice guy or beta male = "fake man", instincts blunted, emasculated = partial sexual release or else no orgasm at all.
it is really the "nice guy" who is unhealthy. He was deeply invalidated at some point during his childhood or teens and he turned to other sources outside of himself to try to gain that validation. Rather than just not talking about his instincts, he actually rejected them and internalized social values in their place. This in fact makes him a social creation, and to women he simply is not "real". He has been modified for safety.
CHAT
