So you've met that cutie in the bar and things went well enough to exchange numbers... now you want to organise a meet-up with her. What's the best way to go about it? Should you give her a call or send a text message?
Well let's have a quick look at each of them.
The telephone
The phone has some fantastic advantages. With a simple 5 minute talk on the telephone you can find out more about each other, build some more rapport and organise the logistics for your upcoming date. It's quick, it's to the point, it saves the slow back and forth from a text exchange, it helps you find out more about her and, importantly, it demonstrates to her that you are confident enough to pick up the phone and make a call.
On the flip side, a phone call has a couple of drawbacks. The biggest of which is my number one pet peeve. Girls are terrible at answering their phones. Maybe it was buried in the bottom of their bag and they didn't hear it, maybe it was sitting in the other room or maybe they were in a meeting or class. It's not that they don't want to answer their phone... they just don't seem to be very good at being contactable by phone call.
If she doesn't answer, then it's best to wait another day or two. She might try to call you back but if she doesn't, then just try again.
Another interesting disadvantage of phone calls is that some girls are quite intimidated of talking on the phone; I've found this especially true of younger girls, 22 and under. They haven't quite developed the social nous and confidence to hold a proper phone conversation and by giving them a call you might actually be making them feel a little uncomfortable and stifled. This is their fault, not yours but it is always nice to make her feel more comfortable.
Texting
Texting is a gift from the technological gods. I absolutely love it. Texting allows you to sustain a simple conversation over an extended time frame. This keeps her thinking of you regularly without you putting in much effort. More thought and creativity can also be put into a text and you're giving her the chance to reply when she has a little more time.
A draw back is that it becomes really easy to over think the messages and worry that perhaps you could have written something better. Especially while you're waiting for her to reply to your last message.
Another drawback is that it can be fiddly to organise the schedules and logistics for a date through a text and can lead to a lot of back-and-forth. I'll share a great strategy which I follow for quickly and easily organising a date by texts in another email soon.
The conclusion?
The general consensus and the rule-of-thumb which I play by is, for girls between 18 and about 22 and maybe older girls who give off more of that “party girl” vibe, send a text to follow up. These girls appreciate a text because it gives them time and space to think about their reply. It also saves them having to talk on the phone, something which they don't feel all that comfortable with just yet.
For girls over 22 who seem a little more mature and worldly, a phone call is the best strategy. It demonstrates to them that you are confident enough to give them a call. It shows them that you have the confidence to demand a piece of their time and you are interested enough in them to put in the effort to get in touch. Switched on girls really appreciate a guy who makes the effort. It shows that he appreciates them.
The bottom line is, both work and it pays to work on your skills for both.
I hope you've found this helpful!
Cheers,
James -
http://therebornnatural.com_________________
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