Hey Artistupick this is a quick analysis
“There are a few women (mainly women I've folded on or had some shit come up” It sounds like you are encountering the same women over and over again.
First impressions can have an impact on subsequent information processing. One theory is that we use stereotypes to deal with people; we will direct our attention to notice the things that mesh with our criteria. If something doesn’t match our criteria- White guy who raps or Asian guy who is bad at maths- we remember this because it is salient, however we will continue to pay more attention to the stereotypical behaviour we expected and say something like “ he the only Asian dude I know whose bad at maths, but still a typical Asian bad driver ”.
Exposer to these types of people (which is most of society) could change their perception by conditioning and reinforcement, but you would have to change the perception of more than 50% of their schema (depending on how strong and accessible their attitudes are towards you or what you actually represent in their eyes).
Quote:
The best way to get over this is just to keep practicing on the girls that TOTALLY throw you off your game, then eventually itl be like yeh OK Im used to this now time to game them.
Stick in you'll get there in time.
If these women are the same women you folded on in the past? Conditioning could work maladaptive and reinforce their negative beliefs and attitudes. If you were to try and crack a joke they are more likely to misunderstand and even take offence. The best advice is prevention, but if you have to encounter these people don’t use any language that could be taken as ambiguous and without looking like your hovering try to keep in close proximity (over 200 studies show what we think is unfamiliar is potentially dangerous. If nothing negative happens after repeated exposure, negative emotions decrease, and positive emotions increase). When you read that the situation has returned in your favour proceed with caution.
The difficult part is just like these women have made errors in judging you; you also don’t really know what their criteria vs schema really is.