Anyone can guide this work related situation?



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PostPosted: Sun Sep 19, 2010 4:21 pm 
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Hey guys,

So here is the situation, i'll keep it short and simple.
I work at FedEx, so there is this store that i come to 3 times a week regularly. I've been working at that line for about a month. I got really friendly and social with the retailers there, and here is the situation:

There is this one girl there, she's amazing. I'm very social with her, and kind of neggy and teasing, but not beyond that. Another thing, i'm 21, but she looks older to me, like 21-23 aprox, oh, and another thing, she has no idea how old I am, cause i look like a 24 year old (what most people say),
anyway,

The question is:

1.How do i escalate the situation with her (there is a guy in the retailers staff btw who's always in the store when i'm there), we work together with the girl, moving boxes and shit like that, moving up and down stairs etc..
2.Should i even try knowing she's older?

Hope that i got my point across clearly, would love to hear suggestions :)

Thanks a lot ;)


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 19, 2010 9:12 pm 
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next time you talk to her say you seem fun, let's continue this conversation after work sometime and get her number. take her out somewhere, isolate, and escalate.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 8:39 am 
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The problem is, it's impossible to isolate her in the store, it's super tiny and has other 3-4 people in it.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 9:29 am 
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Crack a joke, when she is laughing just whisper in her ear "hey, come over here for a minute theres something i want to talk to you about"

and then just drag her around the corner so you guys can have some privacy and you can get the number etc.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 9:45 am 
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Well, there is only 1 spot i can think about where you can have privacy in the store, and that's the storage attic, it's super narrow and you can't stand up there straight, so that's kind of weird asking for her number there :S


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 11:49 am 
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Catch up with her while she's moving out or something?
or just a casual "so how can I contact you" shouldn't sound awkward even in the presence of a few people.

P.s: if you can build a good rapport with the people around you, you won't have issues asking the girl out. they'll be supportive of you.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 6:59 pm 
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Well, about catching her on the way out or something is just pure luck, cause i'm there for about 30-40 min, and it's all pretty fast work, so catching a private moment is kind of difficult. Well, i'll try that, maybe in the attic or something, the only reasonable option i can think of.

About the rapport, well, i'm very social and friendly with the other staff there, but it still will feel awkward doing it in front of them.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 7:39 pm 
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Quote:
About the rapport, well, i'm very social and friendly with the other staff there, but it still will feel awkward doing it in front of them.

Yeah so get a little casually social rather than getting formally social. I'll assume you're not casually social enough because otherwise it wouldn't have been awkward enough. On the flipside, do keep other options open and don't get stuck with one specially one things are not very much in your favor :)

Good Luck.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 12:34 am 
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Quote:
The problem is, it's impossible to isolate her in the store, it's super tiny and has other 3-4 people in it.
to make sure i'm not miss communicating, i wasn't talking about isolating her in the store. i was talking about after you get her #, isolate her by taking her on a date.

as far as the problem you are describing, i really don't think it's a problem that your store is tiny and has 3-4 people in it. open her up about something, small talk, and confidently tell her to write her number down. you can even do it like 5 min before you are leaving.

fwiw, i did it this weekend to a hot bartender at a busy bar. small talk which was basically me telling her i have fun and to write her number down. i told her to write it on paper because for one it's super quick and two, it's not as obv to the entire bar she is giving me her phone number.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 8:20 pm 
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DON'T GET WITH A GIRL AT WORK! Especially if there is only 3-4 other people around. Man I work in a store with 100 plus people on pay roll, trust me it isn't worth the headache. I have and it was fine only because of the girl. Than she started dating a D-bag and he knew about our little whatever before him and he wanted to fight me. It isn't the best place to do things. Stay away from work relationships, most people aren't mature enough to leave it outside of work. There are plenty of other girls and she may seem dope but this is a problem not worth dealing with. Don't game girls at work. If I get a girls number customer or co-worker it is because they gave it to me not because I asked.

I had a crazy customer stalk me for a few after I messed around with her. I have had a lot of experiences at work, and there are a couple other girls that are borrowed help from other stores that are super fly(ridiculously beautiful). I still won't mess around with them even though they both like me, it is a bad idea to mess around with them. I have messed around with more than a few customers but it is very difficult. I have had 3 girls in the store at the same time I messed around with(between customers and employees) and it was awkward. Learn from others mistakes. It is rough when you have 3 girls around that like you and you have messed around with all three, not worth the annoyances.

Please please be careful. Situations like these require a very high maturity level and most people don't have it. Their emotions get involved and it is all down hill.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 11:09 pm 
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I know what and where you are coming from poetic and for some people this is very true, but it can be done successfully. I've done it a few times. I will admit it is playing with fire some. Be ready to be part of gossip.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 22, 2010 7:47 am 
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I know what and where you are coming from poetic and for some people this is very true, but it can be done successfully. I've done it a few times. I will admit it is playing with fire some. Be ready to be part of gossip.
Well, the girl I was messing around with was perfect. We would go to our places(yup multiple places) at work and mess around. It was a solid time, we both knew what it was and it was great for what it was. It was a solid time at work. That is where it ended(didn't even have her number).

It was when she got the D-bag boyfriend and we quit messing around that it got weird. She remained faithful the entire time. Me and her were fine, but her boyfriend hated me. He caused all sorts of drama at my work and all because she was honest with him about her past relationships. He was super jealous, what do you do?

In this case the problem wasn't even in the store, it was some guy dating the girl. We ended up getting into it unfortunately for him he lost. She was cool with all of this, she actually felt he deserved it. I apologized for what happened and she literally said "he had it coming".

While messing around with customers is cool here and there for me it is rough when you have 3-4 girls who are crushing on you in the store at once. My boss, co-manager, and 3 co-workers, have a crush on me (actually I just realized that many people liked me). It is not worth the trouble. Customers are a little more free rein, you can get away with it more often, but it can still come back to haunt you.

Overall I say stay away from co-workers. Most people aren't mature enough to handle it. In some cases it isn't even the person you messed around with, it is some outside source. The gossip isn't worth it, I have dealt with all sorts of situations. There are far to many girls that don't work with you for you to screw with what feeds you dinner, your job.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 06, 2010 6:04 pm 
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Hey DigitalMonkey, sometimes girls like it if you show that you're not afraid to ask for their number when there's other people around. However, I dk if I would even do it, still somewhat shy on the inside.

Here's what you should do. Strike up a conversation about something she's interested in, poetry readings, dancing, karaoke, whatever. Get her talking about it and thinking about it, keep being flirty and teasing and whatnot, then just be like,

"Hey, well next time you go dancing /or karaoke-ing(?) or whatever, give me a call, I'll dance/sing with you."

Something to that effect. It works; she'll often exchange numbers with you right then and there because, how else will she get ahold of you? and you're not asking for her number so you can't get shot down. She might not give you her number, but she might ask for yours. If that happens, just say,

"I don't answer numbers I don't recognize so call me or text me real quick, so I know it's you."

Easy as that. If she doesn't give you her's or ask for yours just forget about it and move on.

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