I'll keep this as brief as I can.

I met this girl, she just broke up with her ex. Having abused her for the best part of two years, he has done all sorts of bad things during the break-up, like spreading lies about her. Basically a massive douche.

We've started hanging out quite a bit, and she definitely responds well to my c&f attitude, and there is something there. The PROBLEM is, she seems obsessed with getting revenge on her ex. He is all she talks about.

He is with someone else now, so I tell her to move on, and that I don't want to be the guy she talks to about that kind of thing.

Anyway, my question is, is she more attracted to the kind of douchebag who will abuse her than someone who uses game to hit on her like me? It seems no matter which mode of behaviour I use, I am always in second place to this guy she doesn't even see anymore! I don't want to have to behave like something I'm not, and she should want better than that anyway.

What can I do to get her chasing me? Assuming she does get over it, or that I meet a new girl with the same problem, what is a good approach for handling a girl like this?

I was thinking of trying to freeze her out for a while until she's over it and just concentrate on some other girls. She moans constantly that he was a dick and was never right for her, yet I bet he will get back in contact next time he needs his dick sucked, and she'll go for it.

Any input would be good, as I am truly at a loss on this one!

Thanks.

She's not responding to the abuse she suffered when she thinks of that man, she is responding to the underlying feelings he made her feel.

Feelings of being utterly dominated by a man. The power she felt that he exuded remains etched in her memory. His behavior minus the physical and emotional abuse is what you should study.

Once you know what pushes her buttons, you can use that knowledge to your advantage.

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" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "