Compliments?!?



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 Post subject: Compliments?!?
PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 6:03 am 
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So I've seen a bunch of posts that say simple ignore a compliment from HBs and make it seem like you hear it all the time and it doesn't phase you. I've been doing that but it always gets to the point where she notices it and calls me out on it. I usually just ignore it yet again and move on.

Is there a better way of handling it? Simply complimenting her back doesn't follow the game at all right?


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PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 2:28 pm 
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A simple "thank you" will suffice. She does something nice for you, so be nice about it. Reward her, she's showing interest.

As for making compliments yourself, just make them when you feel like it. If I notice something cool about a girl, I'll say so right then. That probably only works if your game it pretty direct, though.


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PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 2:39 pm 
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In my honest opinion there is never a bad time to give a compliment to a girl, but if you do compliment her as long as it's genuine then it's a good one. Even if you're not using direct game it's fine to show interest back to the girl as long as she's showing interest as well.

I would encourage you guys if you're going to compliment don't use generic's like you're beautiful, or you're so funny as women hears those all the times. Think of things unique and specific to her. Something along the lines of, "I think what most people don't get about you is the depth of who you are as a person. Sure you're attractive, but you have a lot more going on for you than that. Such as....."


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 Post subject: Re: Compliments?!?
PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 3:19 pm 
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Quote:
So I've seen a bunch of posts that say simple ignore a compliment from HBs and make it seem like you hear it all the time and it doesn't phase you. I've been doing that but it always gets to the point where she notices it and calls me out on it. I usually just ignore it yet again and move on.

Is there a better way of handling it? Simply complimenting her back doesn't follow the game at all right?
Whoever told you that is a fucking idiot.

A compliment from a girl is an indicator of INTEREST, not a shit-test. To ignore her compliment "like it doesn't phase you" is to take her interest and piss on it. Why would you do that?

What you want to do is take her interest, and return it, and then amplify it by rewarding her. You want to always REWARD IOIs such as compliments, compliance, smiling and laughing.

The obvious way to return it is to just say "thanks" with a smile. If you give an obvious compliment back, it seems not genuine and forced, for example "you're not too bad yourself" or something. Don't do that. Better to accept the compliment verbally with just "thanks," but reward with KINO. This reinforces that you like what she did, and gives her a reward - your touch.

The trick is to give her a bit, and then break off. This simple push-pull means that she gets the reward, and then it gets taken away from her. What does this motivate her to do? Keep doing things you like in the hopes of getting more touches (subconsciously). So she might give you another compliment, and you might touch her again. BUT, the third time, DON'T touch. This confuses her and makes her search around for other things you like that'll get you to touch her more. Maybe she'll move closer to you, or even touch you, or laugh at your stupid joke, or any number of things. The trick is to reward a little bit, and not all the time, and then pull that validation away so she keeps searching for it.

Similarly, when GIVING a compliment, it's definitely best to make it genuine. A good way to use push-pull in a verbal setting is to give a compliment, and then soften it with a little jab (IOD/neg), for example, I sent a text to this girl I had a date with last night. When I met her, she dropped these books by accident, and then later at dinner she dropped her fork, so I made fun of her for being clumsy. In my text, I said it was fun and she was pretty cool (compliment, IOI), despite the fact that she's clumsy (little IOD), but as long as she doesn't drop anything on me, we'll be fine (this little bit at the end, although just joking around, sets the frame that she better not fuck up and do something stupid or she might lose me).

In conclusion

Her: IOD
You: ignore

Her: IOI
You: IOI - iod + KINO, then -kino

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