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Just a thought. U could give her your hand in a matter that she should take it, if she does than your ok. If she does not take your hand your pushing it too much, slow down. It's just my opinion.
Eh, I don't know about that, because it's kind of awkward to just be holding hands in the middle of a party.
What you can do though, if you think she's comfortable with you but you aren't sure, is drop your hand next to her so that the backs of your hands are touching. If she keeps her hand there and plays with your fingers a little (at your instigation), then it's ON. If she moves her hand and crosses her arms or something, sorry, but no.