edit: mods, if this isnt the right forum, please move

Hi Guys,

This is my first post after lurking these forums for about 3-4months trying to gather information on being a PUA.

I followed some of the posts on these forums with this girl i see at least once a week. Yesterday was the biggest disappointment yet. I HAD THE CHANCE TO CLOSE AND DIDNT!

So im here asking for some support and pointers on what to do next. Quick story of what has happened.

I frequent this restaurant once/twice a week, the manager there is the one im trying to get. So about a week ago she broke up with the long-term BF (5 years i believe). On the day she told me she broke up, she made it known to me that she was SINGLE... that was my first opportunity i missed as she caught me off guard when she said cause she was walking back into the restaurant and couldn't say anything. (I understand there could have been many things i could have said as she walked away, but this is why im here! to learn)

So come yesterday, i go back, it was a quiet day for them and she comes outside... to show me her new phone as i was talking to her, she gave me IOI, looked at me when i talked, took a longer break to talk to me, the servers all came out and told her how long she was taking, etc.

Now.. since im new to this scene, and this could have been my first pickup using what i've learnt, but it was a disaster, as we talked talked talked... and i DID NOT CLOSE

looking back, i thought of how she gave me plenty of opportunities for me to close... such as her playing with her phone.. her taking the extra time to chat with no one around from her colleagues.. etc, this is what is killing me

so after my story...

what would a PUA do? I know next time the same openings wont be there, so ill have to neg her a bit to get her to be interested a bit more again?

Any input is appreciated!

thanks!


edit: adding more to the story that i forgot

as she was playing with her phone, she logged into facebook and showed me her profile... there i also had a chance, and blew it...
i know the more info you guys have.. the suggestions could be better
so basically, i know her facebook info now.. but i dont think just adding her out of nowhere would be a good idea...

woha.. it reminds me of those stories "had 2 girls in my house and almost had an orgy" but when u get down to the details the guy did not even make out with two of them

anyway.. relax.. breath.. drink water... NOTHING HAPPENED! you had few interactions, she might have given you few IOI's and you did not escalate. if you'd try escalate she might have complied and might have declined. neither of us knows. the only way to know is try and escalate =)

you seem to know this girl, so you will more opportunities to escalate.

the point of being PUA is being a cool guy that has abundance of women in his life and they love his attention. so, BECOME this guy. you are talking as if you had some time limited window opportunity. you are not a thief that needs window opportunity to kiss a girl or close in some way. learn to be a guy who can speak with women anytime and escalate the interaction further

facebook can be good if you have high social life. means, you got girls commnenting your status, showing playfulness with you, teasing u and more..

if u got no social proof on facebook then it might not be good idea =)

saying you should "neg" is like saying to a guy who doesn't drive to make a special turn while driving 100km/h.. it's not how it works.

u gotta work on your verbals,sub-communication,fashion style and lifestyle in order to become an attractive guy.

I suggest checking my blog www.puacottage.com and read the article 'how to learn pickup".. you are also welcome to go through this process with me and get consistent results in field.

cheers!
s-man,
PuaCottage -www.puacottage.com

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Accelerate PickUp Learning Curve -
www.puacottage.com

Facebook http://www.facebook.com/sman.pua

Twitter http://twitter.com/sman_pua

www . puacottage . com

Hey Mex

Im in the exact same boat as you. even when signals are there i just cant bring myself to close. even though im able to justify to myself that the worst case is i get a "no"

Heres a perfect example

A few days ago i was waiting for take out at a local pizza place and this HB7 sits down next to me. i open and after 2 questions shes really into the conversation and asking me them more then im asking her while keeping amazing eye contact.

but then, once my order was called, i got my food and said bye and left, im sure that i would have been able to get the number, but didnt even try.

I gotta get over this because if i dont then theres no real point of even starting the conversation.


Hope this helps, to show that your not alone in this fight against AFC

sman, thank you for the comments and ill check out your blog

and Yanks2010.. yea man.. thats what happens to me a lot of the time...

got off a relationship, trying to get back in it.. and its hard...

im gonna see her tomorrow, ill post what happened, im going to go for a Direct Approach since ive noticed the IOIs and i know she was already waiting for me to ask her for it...