how to get through my sticking point



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PostPosted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 5:10 am 
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Hey guys,

I'm in the middle of The Game (so just starting this stuff) and I need a help with my sticking point, which shouldn't be, but is happening. I don't know why, but when I approach and open a set, I run out of what to say. I just don't know. I try to say "anything" and avoid a small talk like "what do you do" or "where do you come from", but that is usually followed by an embarrassing silence. So the result is that I leave without a success. When I manage to get through this point, things get much better. But the problem is that it doesn't happen often and it's turning me down. The result is, that I don't open that often, because I don't want to get stuck and have no idea how to move forward.

I need a help please, don't let me on my own...


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 8:48 am 
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I usually ask for a "female opinion" on something, or comment on something she is wearing. If you really can't think of anything interesting to talk about then revert back to the usual questions. Yeah, it's not the ideal situation but you want the conversation to flow as naturally as possible. Or at least make it seem like it to her.

If you do this, try to seem genuinely interested when asking. Instead of giving the question the appearance of, "Oh, I'm just asking these routine questions to keep the conversation going...don't really care." It's like when you get back home to your roommates or see friends/family/coworkers/classmates and they ask you how your day was. You can tell these are routine questions and you can tell when they don't really care that much. Use voice tonality and have a curious look on your face to express this. It also lets her know you are screening her.

Being able to naturally talk about interesting things and start interesting conversations on the fly is part of being a good PUA. One tip I have is to work on your inner game. Usually if you are a collected and confident mental state it is easier to just talk. I have your sticking point myself, but only when I'm nervous or anxious.

If anything, and for the meantime, just sit down and think of some good conversation topics. Think of the girl, think of where you are....what could you talk about? It may help to remember past experiences where your sticking point became a major obstacle. Try to think of what you could have said in this situation. Make it appropriate for each setting. Be creative. Write these down and memorize. You want to be able to do this on the fly, but if you can't at least be able to do it this way. Yeah it'll be canned, but at least it'll be your own stuff.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 9:59 am 
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This should help! Mrcoffee posted this last month. Check it out!

conversation-topics-never-stall-in-conv ... 62337.html

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 6:48 am 
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Thanks guys,

I followed your advices and it helped a bit. I just have to practice it now. I had a bit of time tonight, so I went to salsa. I'm pretty comfortable there, because I'm pretty good. I didn't know that girls in USA give their Facebook instead of phone numbers. The evening was successful from that point if view. And the line "I have to go, how can we continue in this chat" works :)

But I wanted to ask this. I've got some good (and real) DHV stories. I was a ballroom dancer and I danced on a World Championships, I skipped 2nd grade at elementary school because I was super smart, I travelled pretty lot (in Europe). But the problem is, that sometimes I don't present that stories very good and it's followed by silence sometimes. Even if I wait a bit to let them say something. Fortunately, it wasn't the case tonight. I started talking to one guy whilst waiting for the bachata class to end to get a bit more comfortable and it worked. I then danced with one beginner girl, she enjoyed the dancing so everything was much easier. And she also came back to me after we danced with other people.

My slight disadvantage at loud places is, that english is only my second language, so I don't understand sometimes (especially when girls have an accent I'm not used to). But I try to make that an advantage to get closer, kino etc. As I said, it worked today. But it was only a half success, because dancing was my opener and part of conversation which made her comfortable around me. I should also go to the streets and malls to see how long will it take to be successful there. But it's a good start, what do you think?


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 08, 2010 6:30 am 
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Think of stuff to say before you talk to the chicks.
Like if they like the music in the club.
There is a specific painting on the wall that shocks you.
Comment on their shoes.
When you get into a place figure out some things you can talk about that are relevant to the area and use them when you get stuck.

Dude if you got an accent thats a bonus. Everyone lovse accents so play on it. Then they'll ask where your from. You should have a DHV story about where your from and what brought you here. Don't let the truth get in the way of a good story. Include the dancing n all that.

If you get stuck in convo ask if the girl likes dancing. Say you enjoy it and need someone to dance with. Teach girls the moves to some dancers. They love that shit man. No doubt. Then you the cool dude in the club dancing with chicks.

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