Gentleman,
I respond to a fair amount of posts on the forum and one universal thread I see is about what to do when you get a number, when to call, and what to talk about. I want to pick this up from the point in set where you got her phone number. You built some kind of attraction you may have been talking for the past 15 minutes doing routines and such or being natural and now you have her #. SCORE!
What do I do now? First thing is first....DON'T EJECT! Giving you her number is a sign of trust and commitment to you. If you eject and run back to your buddies waiting for you then it's going to make her feel badly, and it feel like you were just after her # and not her.
Stay in set, and go into comfort/connection/rapport building or whatever you want to call it. You need to spend a few minutes talking about YOU. I don't mean some dumb made up DHV story about the time your stripper girlfriend called you up cause some dude was following her home, and you with your friends cause you're a leader kicked his ass either. I mean really talking about you as a person... It could be:
-Her/Your family (If you have any siblings, etc.)
-Her/You are from
-Her/Your Passions are in life
-Her/Your Goals
-Her/Your Life Lessons Learned
-Her/Your Interests or Hobbies
-Where Her/You like to take vacations
-Where Her/You like to go eat or hang out at
There are tons of things to talk about I just list some to get your minding thinking in the right direction. Ideally after you get her phone # you want to spend at least 15 more minutes in set if possible talking about this stuff. This will be useful later. Cause it shows genuine interest in her, and it lets us learn about each other.... Yes, we will need this later for all you who are screaming this is boring...
Now, if you are able stay in the set longer... YES LONGER and try to move her to another Venue for an instant date. Restaurants, quieter bars, coffee shops, etc. are all great places to bounce to. You should have a list of the places around where you are at gaming already if you are thinking through the logistics.... And if possible after that try to get her home.
Okay so assuming it ends at her # and you spent a little time talking after that. Within the next 1 hour text her to tell her you enjoyed meeting her, had a good time, saw something that just reminded you of her again, etc. Just send a simple text within an hour. Let's her know you are thinking of her and wins you points for later!!! Trust me on this one.
Now it's been say anywhere from 12-24 hours since you last physically saw her. It's time to call or text. Some guys like to wait 24 hours and that's cool. Anything more than that and the girl begins to think you are interested and writes you off. Strike while the iron is hot!!! Her emotions where at their highest when she saw you last... the longer you wait the more she cools off.
Call her preferrably. If you aren't comfortable on the phone get through it. Not much different than talking in person except you can't see her. Calling builds more of a connection than text. But if you must then text.... This isn't an alternative to calling it's a backup... now you know the difference. When you call you want to see how she's doing and go into MORE COMFORT BUILDING.
The reason for more comfort and connection building is simple. The more you talk about the more she gets to know you and gets comfortable with you. This allows her to be able to escalate to going out with you.
IF you got her # and ejected, then called her you wouldn't have anything to talk about cause you don't REALLY know her and she doesn't REALLY know anything about you. Not only is that akward but if you want to meet she doesn't know what she's gonna talk to you about because she doesn't know anything about you. It's easier for her to ignore your calls, texts, or flake on you than it is to go on a date with you.
On the other hand if you do the proper steps its easier to keep going than blow you off!
There is a method to the madness after all! Anyways, generally speaking you want to spend an hour or two on the phone or via text in comfort building before asking for the date. If the vibe is really solid then go for it sooner. It's easy to transition to places you both like to eat, hang out, whatever. Then ask her out.
Hope these tips and this method gains you more success, less flakes, more dates, and ultimately THE ONE.
Jon
CHAT