So Hear me out. I've been feeling my AFC resurfacing these couple of days. Let me tell you how. In the past month or so I learned a lot from this community, my game has changed drastically. I don't see the girl as something to idolize, i keep my cool in front of HB8+, i NEG a lot and have been growing my social circle by talking to a lot of people and meeting new ones. My sticking point is the attraction phase (building attraction), but that is not what is important. Honestly this community has changed me, but there is always this voice in the back of my head that tells me that sooner or later I will come back to my natural self (AFC) and that is what made me hesitate to get in this whole community in the first place...because i never could believe in drastic changes...it was like a myth to me! But i have started to believe in it...but trust me, its exhausting constantly trying to be a better version of yourself. The last few days, my AFC returned ( i sound like a schizophrenic loll), i've been losing my cool and the biggest problem is this oneitis i have developed for some girl at college HB8, most beautiful eyes and smile. Her looks are getting to me, i'm getting nervous in front of her, i'm not cool, i'm not fun. We talked a lot on Facebook this weekend, but i'm gonna stop talking to her on Facebook....i feel its ruining stuff. Its easy to be a PUA on FB chat...not much in real life.

- Anyways any replies or tips that may help are appreciated.
+ DJ Fuji: "its not about being yourself, but the best version of yourself" Is there somebody that doesn't agree.?
- How can i stabilize my PUA lifestyle or is it normal to frequently oscillate between your old self and the one you want to be

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Be as you wish to seem - Socrates

Unlike almost everyone else here, I feel that if you have talked to a girl and seen her around a lot Liking her and wanting to get closer to her isnt a problem or a disease as they make it sound around here by calling it ONEITIS. Just take some deep breaths and relax yourself when you talk to her. Does she seem intersted? Be chill. if you are already taking to her alot like you said than you are past thehard part. Now just relax and it come across in your subconcious actions. I still feel that declaring a fialed attempt or possible future failure stress "oneitis" is completely making a pathetic excuse for your lack of 1 ability to keep your cool and 2 success..

just my 2 cents on the matter

Unlike almost everyone else here, I feel that if you have talked to a girl and seen her around a lot Liking her and wanting to get closer to her isnt a problem or a disease as they make it sound around here by calling it ONEITIS. Just take some deep breaths and relax yourself when you talk to her. Does she seem intersted? Be chill. if you are already taking to her alot like you said than you are past thehard part. Now just relax and it come across in your subconcious actions. I still feel that declaring a fialed attempt or possible future failure stress "oneitis" is completely making a pathetic excuse for your lack of 1 ability to keep your cool and 2 success..

just my 2 cents on the matter

They say there's no greater falling than apathy. I say there's no greater strength. The last HB8 or 9 I was with I got with because I was on a lucky streak in life and I didn't give a shit if she told me I was the ugliest pug on the planet. It worked out in the end.

Sup buddy.. in my oppinion..you need to realize the moment when you feel that your AFC builds up in you. Now really concentrate on how it surfaces and how it makes you feel. Next time.. whenever just a little bit of the same emotion you felt is starting to increase in your body.. you need to be self conscious and really just think about sarging experience. Think : Holy shit the AFC comes up.. I'm not an AFC..she's just any other target.. I am already preselected... why the fuck am I starting sweating?? FUCK her I have 3 others girls waiting for me outside. This is like a psychological trick I learned from my stress book.. it's knowing and concentrating when a certain emotion that disturbes you comes into your mind and learning slowly to make you wake up in the reality. Because let's face it.. there a million girls out there.. it's just that we're blinded by beauty, the desire to be loved - Attraction is not a choice.. right? Practice this technique until it becomes a reflex.

Also.. I do believe some people exagerate with oneitis problem.. even though I dont like it.. we all need some affection- we want to find someone we can be in a relationship.. so just microcalibrate your game.. in comfort building phase (when there's only the 2 of you) just turn off game... TURN OFF.. you don't need any material building comfort.. now if a AMOG comes, obstacle, cockblock, planes, name them all... you micrcalibrate depending on the situation.. you turn you gear ON until they go away or until she goes away.. but when you are together, theres no need to think about any material in my opinion. Just the negs and the body language (CRUCIAL!!)

Also.. as I said to you yesterday.. we need to sarge..get you some women and than see if you will say that she's a special flower. Wow I'm really phylosophical today.. But really.. I also believe that with a lot of sarging (we're still kind of beginners, but made a lot of progress) we will overcome this.. I can just feel it.. it's another lifestyle that takes courage, perseverance and dedication.. but just try to think about all the good things that will come even if sometimes, it sucks having that feeling that you cant do it.

You know I feel you with your one itis.. I've been more than enough in that fucking spot I'm through with it.. so if you ever need help/advice on what to do/not to do/.. feel free to private message, write a post, text me, call me, or chat me up during classes.. peace dinosaur!

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Greatness is never borned

Buddy, the underlying problem is your inner game. There are no quick fixes, no magical routines or psychological tricks you can try to get rid of the AFC anxiety that you have described. A month is simply not enough time to build up your confidence (inner game) to match your outer game. At the moment it feels exhausting because you are having to "act" as a high value male rather than "being" the high value male that you can be. No matter how good your outer game is at the moment, your subconscious still carries the same AFC attitudes that you did before - one month is simply not enough time for anyone to become truly confident!
Lack of confidence is what causes oneitis, AFC behaviour and the like.

To summarize, fix your confidence and you'll fix your inner game and you'll feel much more at ease. Start going to the gym, participating in sports, really doing something with your life that you can be proud of. Walk with your chest out and head high at all times. Have a set of principles that you stick to - fake it till you make it!

Sincerely,
C [/i]