hey bro,
here's my feed back:
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1. Once I started dancing with a girl i thought It would be good to ‘’engage the group’’ to reduce the chances of me being blocked later but no matter how energetic and nice I am sometimes the friend would have a look of stone and pretend I don’t exist while dancing autonomously on her own!?!?! Are they used to being left alone and will let me dance with her friend? But iv found that most of the time they will be dead weight to the girl that just wants to be/dance with me or have fun in general eg. ‘’My friend has work tomorrow’’, ‘’my friend is going home now’’ ‘’my friend…’’ ect
you are doing something wrong that you are not noticing, and none of us can help you until we see whats actually happening. girls do this all the time and its normal, but they do it to protect their friends from awkward guys so probably you are being awkward and dont even realize. its a normal response to being aproached a million times per night.
I remember like a month ago i went to a club with a friend and two girls he had picked up on a bus, (previous to going to the club we had pre gamed at his apartment), and when we entered the club the poor girls couldnt walk 10 feet without some drunk douchebag trying to sweet talk them... it really opened my eyes to how many times this girls have to say no every night, and how lame guys look when they are drunk and try to pick up chicks. avoid being too energetic, match their own level of energy, and bring good vibes to the group. i think whats going on is that you are being so energetic that its undermining your look and making you look like you want something from those girls.
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2. What’s worse is girls who will be receptive and open to dancing but her friend will automatically (and physically) block me anyway within seconds, in these situations i dont really see how i could have engaged both in time. Did I stand 0 chance? I’m sure she was into it and didn’t give her friend any ''come save me'' signals!
dont think that if the girl actually liked you you would be blocked away. their friends are picking something weird in your attitude and are protecting their friend from having to be unpolite by being themselves unpolite.
its not that the girl actually requested saving, its that girls that go out on clubs have men categorized, and you unfortunately fall under the "get the fuck off" category for some reason you seem not to know and from what you say i cant figure out.
i would need more info. actually, if you really want i can provide the following service for free for you: get one of your friends to tape you approaching this girls and send it to my email listed below, and i'll give you personal feed back. its probably your body language thats fucking this for you.
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3. How long should I dance before I take her to a corner and talk because I often would dance and they would find friends/get dragged away ect. It seems like the longer you wait to move away the greater the risk?
well try what i told you in my post. approach, then leave, then come back if you had a good response, and so on. after the second time, take the girl's hand and do a little spin, then bring her closer, smile the hole time, then push her away (this is all part of the dance! dont push her physically, do the salsa thing were the guy spins the girl, holds her real tight, and then pushes her away. if dancing is not your thing, go to salsa classes) this is a calibration.
by bringing her closer you push her barrier down, and that will result in her trying to push it back up again, so you push her away before she can do so, making her feel relief but also having kept that barrier lower, so the next time you can pull her even closer, repeat the push away if necesary, and keep dancing until she leaves (if she does you pushed it too far) or you can get close enough to kiss her.
i absolutely love to tease girls by lightly and softly touching her forehead with mine, and looking her in the eyes, without going for the kiss, and then releasing the tension by pushing her away in the dance again. i do this a few times till the girl is almost begging for the kiss and then i seal the deal.
(always keep that sexy smile you should have practiced in the mirror)
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4. When girls leave and give you the *be right back* signal (which is never going to happen) should I just ask them where they are headed and say ‘’me too’’ if is a place we can talk. I realize that you should be willing to let a girl go to get a girl and in this case I did because I actually didn’t care but what if I had built any attraction/invested anything in the interaction, then what?
NONONONONONO!!!!!. let them go, smile, act as if she said she wants you to be the father of her children and thinks you sexier than brad pitt and keep moving around the club! you want all the other girls in the room to think you are old friends that met and said hi to each other and then you moved on. DO NOT EVERRRR push things, i've done that so many times in my younger years and its creepy as fuck, and that vibe is felt by all the people in the room. its almost like you smell bad after that...
if she says i'll be right back, and you know she will, as she's leaving take her by the hand softly, making her turn around to see you
hey im sorry but my friends are waiting for me, i would like to stay in contact with you though, wanna give me your number before you go?
if she likes you she will say yes, but if she's leaving its probably because she doesnt like you. always remember a break from an interaction doesnt have to be a bad thing. you can also be like "ok im gonna go too see you around" if the club is small enough you will bump into her again. in that case i once was wasted and said "see, its destiny!" to the girl as i bumped into her, I already had her number and she loved that line, which is probably the lamest line i've pulled off in my entire life but it worked, what can i say, i ended up going to her place to "watch a movie" a few days later.
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5. Tall girls, so leaning in for escalation is out of the window…. How do you guys play this one?
Overall the main source of my confusion is discerning which situations dictate that I should engage the group and which I should isolate. It seems these polar opposites mean I will shoot myself in the foot if I chose the wrong one.
some girls like it when you look deep into their eyes and you touch their chin with your index and thumb fingers (the thumb should be the one you are looking at. fuck its hard to explain without pictures.), i always use that to kinda gently hold the girls mouth or turn their head towards looking at me so kissing her is easier logistically. you could use that with tall girls. you have to make it sensual though. you need to have first pulled off the hole push pull thing and the front touching front thing too.
you should isolate the group first and then the girl, but you will only get this through practice, and you need to know that even the best PUAs get rejected a FUCKING LOT. they get rejected just as much as you do, its just that they have learned to know which girls are more likely to reject them and how to avoid them, and have learned how not to come off categorized in the "unfuckable" category. and also learned how to close the 1 to 5 % of girls that dont reject them
hope this is helpful!
Jason
CHAT
I should note that the night that spawned these questions was quite a good one but i was just trying to iron out any flaws for the next time so i dont think my energy was off as i had no proplems with dancing with most girls. I just didnt know how to handle group situations. My thoughts are: