What do you do when you DHV too much and the girl starts to feel bad. I naturally have a lot of things that I can DHV (hobbies, interests, some pre-selection) with but the girl doesn’t. I was out and when I start asking her questions about herself she said “your making me feel like a total loser!!” (just because I wanted to know her hobbies – her’s was texting and eating ). How do you bring yourself down without looking like a loser yourself?

My whole logic behind the DHV’s (as you probably know) was to qualify and reward but that kinda backfired. I may be in damage control idk. Should I just start incorporating me being interested because of her personality and nothing else.

Next time I see her I was thinking I could say something like this:

(laughter about something)

“You know, you’re a really cool person, and you make me laugh *high five* I knew it was a good idea to keep you around (c&f)”

Im not sure about that last part but any other suggestions?

Yeah, good questions and I'm not sure how to handle... Sometimes I have this problem too. Maybe it's just because I'm DHV'ing quite blatantly - like I'm saying stuff to say how awesome I am, and so she either thinks "what a jerk" or "oh, he's too cool for me" and all I'm trying to do is qualify... HTH... P.

I eject from sets like these, if the best thing she has going for her is the fact she texts and eats is she really the type of girl you want in your life.

Reminds me of some day game I did in Soho, I ejected because after asking 2 girls where was good to eat they said Subway, I pushed for somewhere good their answer..... KFC, argh in the middle of london the best restaurant they could come up with was KFC holy shit, I ejected they are not the type of women I want in my life.

lol I got the opposite problem - I don't DHV enough...
You can always say "Hey! your not a loser... you are totally fun! really!! Here do a little spin for me. Wow even your back looks good "
That will DLV you a little and will bring her self confident up a little but be careful!!!!

You can always compliment her for her looks like an AFC just for DLV or move your hands a lot like AFC this can also take out the thought "He's too cool for me"
LOL I don't think it's really a problem to DLV after DHV too much

And about "what a jerk" as I know Style said that if you insult you can follow up with a compliment to balance it.

Haha but if you can help me and tell me what are your DHV routines? cuz I don't know how to DHV properly.

Thanks!

Well, I ain't perfect at it, but I think DHV's pretty easy - just do lots of cool stuff and be really excited about it.

Counter example:
(In a flat, bored, boring voice) "Yeah, I'm a karate black belt, but that's not very interesting"

Versus:
"Yeah, I've been doing Karate for years, I just fell in love with it so much when I started and wow it was hard but I love how you can see yourself progressing. All the kicks and strikes and jumps you see the black belts do when you start and you think "I could never do that", well, after a few years you suddenly realise you can, and then you realise that maybe the stuff that still looks impossible give it a couple more years and you can do it, and yeah, now I can, and I'm teaching it a bit now, which is great - you see little kids and it all strikes them in exactly the same way. "I can never do this... oh shit, I can!""

Which probably leads her into "oh wow you're teaching it now" and then you can mention that you're 1st dan or whatever, and she'll ask what that means, and you can talk about black belts and you've got the DHV in without it even seeming like you were trying - you just got carried away because you love it so much!

Wow, now I'm all amped after having typed that

P.

I usually let my body language do most of the work in terms of DHVs (convey confidence, a leader of men yaddah yaddah). Then just let the rest flow naturally, if you have cool hobbies and a cool life you will naturally be pumped about it and they will also see that you have this awesome life.

If you don't have awesome/cool hobbies you should get some, you will meet different people and your life will generally be better