Long Distance wreaking havoc on relationship.



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 16 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Tools & Techniques of Game: Meeting, Attracting and Seducing Women » Relationships


Forum rules


Relationship Subforum Rules

1. Posts about how to get a girlfriend will result in a ban.


2. Posts about your ex-girlfriend will result in a ban.

3. Any other posts not related to your current girlfriend will result in a ban.



Author Message
PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 1:41 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 6:51 am
Posts: 5
So to give everyone the run down:

My gf of 11 months has had to move back to England due to her finishing her studies and Visa running out. At the moment she will be back home for around 12 months before coming back to Australia for further study. I am still studying fulltime so unable to move there. For the last 8 months we have been living together.

We have decided not to do long distance due to the massive time apart (12 months) and also at the risk of wrecking things, through jealousy etc. None the less since she has been back, we haven't set an boundaries, so still talking every day, still sharing affection etc. I was kind of getting sick of it, as i felt like she had too much control (Was not wb'ing to some texts, playing it cool) Yet i would jump when she wanted to speak to me. I spoke to her a few nights ago and said if we aren't doing long distance i don't want to keep things going as there is too much risk of one of us getting fucked over (Other person getting with someone else, one person getting over the other sooner etc).... Either way, we ended the call with not coming to any decision and not wanting to 'just be friends' yet still not in a Long distance relationship....

The other night I mentioned how she hasn't got back to a nonchalant text of mine, and she turned it into some massive drama about how she is suffocated etc etc. I basically just said, it has nothing to do with you, whether it was a friend or family, i don't want to contact someone if they don't contact back.

Basically my question is; what do i do now? I know i should just get over her and go fuck some other chick, but i don't want to cut all ties just yet but i also don't want to be the vulnerable wimp. Should i just employ basic techniques by freezing her out, or are there a few recommendations you have for me to not let her be so comfortable about it all?

Ultimately i predict she will withdraw now, convince herself she is suffocated etc.... what should i do to reverse this situation? Whenever i freeze her out she just does the same back (She's cold... haha)

Anyway worth asking, interested what other people would do and whether i'm being crazy.

P.s Clearly this isn't one-itis, i've had many girls, but just going straight from living together and then pulled apart despite both not wanting to, is a big change.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 11:47 am 
Offline
Dedicated Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 6:01 pm
Posts: 782
Location: Croatia
You already know what you should do. Sometimes things just can't work out because of circumstances. It's hard because you shared a reality and life, well now that's gone. Clinging onto it will make things harder. It will be much easier for you if you don't stay in touch. An email every couple of months won't do any harm, but if you decided you're not doing the long distance thing, you need to set some boundaries. Tell her it's hard for you to keep going like this and it's better to cut all contact for a while. If she convinces herself she's feeling suffocated, I don't see a point into trying to reverse the situation, since you don't want a long distance relationship. You will probably miss each other and it's ok to exchange some general emails every now and then, just don't let your life start evolving around internet communication with a girl on the other side of the planet. Trust me, these things always go sour, 99% of the time and it's already started happening since she's feeling "suffocated". Don't play any games and do a freezeout in hopes she'll start jumping. Be honest, tell her you need this for yourself and really mean it. If you're meant to be, things will work out when she comes back. I'm not saying to GFTOW or to do the opposite and lock yourself into your room and don't look at any women because you're hoping you'll be together when she comes back. I think great lovers always hold a special place in one's heart, so when you do meet again, if it's meant to be, it will happen, but for now you need to be single, and if you meet anybody you like, or if you just have an urge to fuck 30 women, do it. If you wanna just be alone for a while, do it. But cut things off with her, only pain and grief can come out of it. Hope this helped, good luck!

P.S. I'm saying all of this because I've done the long distance thing, swore I'd never do it again, and did it again recently, so it really refreshed my memory how fucked up it can be LOL ;)


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 12:13 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 6:51 am
Posts: 5
Yeah you said it pretty well.... Going from having everything to absolutely nothing the next moment kills you.

I'm more lost as to what to do at the moment than anything. I am guessing i will have to resort to what you mentioned, and that is setting boundaries and withdrawing, but fuck ('Scuse the French).. the idea of that absolutely kills me.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 1:44 pm 
Offline
Dedicated Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 6:01 pm
Posts: 782
Location: Croatia
I know you feel like your heart is being ripped out right now. With no contact in a week you'll feel a lot better, it takes just one week! I'm not saying you'll be great, but really a lot better. If you keep in touch, you'll just prolong the agony...


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 4 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link