ok the general answer would normally/probably be move on--game other girls--enjoy yourself and your hobbies and get over it.Id generally believe the line EXs are Exs for a reason

but what kinda move on timescale would people reccomend--just say after a good year you have one hell almighty of an argument where both partys are in the wrong and you both use the terms ''never wanna see you again''--what length of time should pass before it is no longer a fight that possibly could be patched up and is now a more permanent irretrevable break up from which both should just move on and forget trying to wallpaper over the cracks

You know, anyone can say anything -- move on, find another girl, etc etc -- no one really knows that answer but you. No one has lived your life with this girl. I feel like when things hit the roof we complain and talk about the negatives, but when things are great a lot of people shy to mention it.

Listen, I'm "seeing" my ex or whatever you call her. we don't have a label. we've had some really fun and great moments and then theres moments where i'd like to forget. You need to look at your heart and balance it with your mind, in your own way. Sometimes you need to swallow your pride and reach out depending on the situation. You will never know unless you try and only you can answer if the juice is worth the squeeze.

God know I have my issues with my ex.

Thanks buddy

OK Herne, I can relate...I am there. I had the big fight...fuck you's were thrown back and forth...mind you, I have never said that to a woman I loved...EVER...but damn, she got the best of me...said things that hurt...of course, I returned the favor twice fold...I do admit, I was wrong for it and have been contemplating just sending a message of apology but I won't...I will not allow myself to repair her ego.

I said my good byes in a not so gentleman-like way but what's done is done.

Every scenario is different...this time can be used to determine what did drive you two apart. Can it be fixed...sure, but mind you, there may be resentment or those same issues may re-surface...remember, you broke up for a reason and the chances of trying really aren't in your favor unless you both can turn a new leaf and not bring up what happened between you two.

As a time frame....there is no set time frame...days, months, years...it's your call.

Honestly...when do you feel ready to talk with her...you won't know if she is ready till you try...but let me ask you...why do you want this?

Do you feel she is the one? Not to be an ass, but we have all had good times and bad times in a relationship...it's the good times the push us into not wanting to put in the work, fall back into our old ways because it's comfort...no one wants to go through the pain of having to find another girl...but that's where it can be fun.

New people to meet and a great possibility to meet some one better...you just have to be open to it. I say...do what you think is best...I did...I went against everyones advice...stuck it out for 7 months of just bullshit and in the end...I came out knowing...I tried and I have no one to blame but me. I thought she was the one but in reality, she was just one of many. I am having a better time now...I have met new friends and I like how things are going.

You just need to give it some time but again...you will find out what you really want to do and do it...don't let me try to convince you otherwise!

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You can't make the same mistake twice, the second time you make it, it's no longer a mistake, it's a choice.

I don't like to reheat my meal, sometimes I can be weak and sleep again with her, but it leads nowhere. A lot of my ex's are still my friends and we are in good term. Usually the best advice is to move on and find another one. I don't believe in friendship between men and women in the US. If it didn't work one time, it won't work a second time.
Re-think why it didn't work, and don't forget that, otherwise you'll learn with the hard way that it will happens again over and over. Don't make the same mistakes again...

thanks Guys , many valid points made all around