I don't usually ask for advice, but I need some clear perspective. I've been committed to this girl for 6 weeks. I'm really connected to her, love her, whatever. She had a one way ticket out of town and I knew this going into our relationship. Last week she was only planning on leaving for a few weeks. This week I notice she's distant and I call her out on it and she tells me the next day we have to break up because she's going to be out of town for three MONTHS (she changes her mind a lot on this, she might not come back at all, I have a feeling). I agree because we've only been dating for a month and no way I can behave for three months (or however long) without her at this point, which I told her.

So here's the part I'm losing sleep over. She's leaving in two weeks and says she's going to be too busy to see me. I encouraged her to make the time so we can at least have fun before she leaves. I'm playing it off like it's no big thing, but part of me wants to just fight this, press her into making an hour for me so I can tell her in person how I feel. I can give her my best shot and it might be enough to make her decide to come back early again; might tip the scales. I might as well throw it out there because she might end up not coming back anyway. On the other hand, I feel like playing it cool, making new dates, and stopping the bleeding is the wise choice (which I'm already doing).

This is a relationship, I'm not asking how to game her. Thoughts? What would you guys do? Stay the course or spill my guts? Thanks, you guys are helping already.

Trust me, I have no problem focusing on my self here. I don't believe in closure, it takes time to get over a relationship. I could make this super easy on her, but I have a stake here and she's going to know where she stands before I let her go. Tch, melodrama.

You've only been together for 6 weeks .... she already had the ticket before you went into the relationship. Her mind was made, and a guy will not make her want to stay. She already had a plan to leave. If I had plans to leave in a few months, I wouldn't commit to any serious relationship...
And, if you knew of her one way ticket, why would you still pursue her ??? Were you expecting to change her mind out of love .. ? ...
What exactly do you mean by "behaving" without her... ??? Like, not cheating on her ? Long distance relationships can't work, in my opinion, unless youre utterly and completely in love, which if she was, she would actually stay.
Why is she leaving?? Work, family, away time??
Think inside her shoes.. if you we're leaving in a few weeks, why would you commit into a relationship ..?
You should ask her that: Why commit into a serious relationship, when she had plans to leave!

I'm not trying to make her stay or have a long distance relationship, I just wanted to give her incentive to come back. She's leaving for a wedding and to spend time with friends. I talked to her face to face Tuesday and I decided we should see eachother til she leaves, we'll take a break, and pick up if she comes back, no questions asked about the months she's gone.

So I felt satisfied with that. But now I feel like a chump. She showed me this crappy phone she's using now and said she was going to change to another company to get a new phone and would text me from her new number. I tried calling her in the evening yesterday and it went straight to voicemail. As of today, I still haven't heard from her and I'm thinking she might have just made up the problem with her phone to avoid me because when she tried breaking up, I said I wanted to meet with her and made this little arrangement.

But that seems insecure, if she wanted to avoid me, she could have just made excuses not to meet me Tuesday and could've changed her number without telling me. Probably they're just transferring her number to a new service, which causes an interruption. I don't know, I made a Facebook account and sent her a message there. Either way, I think I need to leave it the fuck alone at this point, I'm being really clingy because she's only in town for a limited time. I should probably act like she already left, no?

I would find it very uncomfortable having to lie everytime by making up an excuse when you want to see her. If she wanted to break up, and you insisted, you're being too clingy, and the more excuses she'd gave you, the more you'd be insisting her. Its like when we Push away a girl, they want us to pull her, its the same here, she wanted to push you but you kept insisting, so a simple NO wouldn't do it ... so whatever the deal with her phone is, if its true or not. She HAD to lie to you, for your good.
Think about how uncomfortble it would be when a girl wants to see you and you don't want, and she constantly insists and you have to make up a new excuse everyday. I mean, you can't be busy at all times every day ...
You are INDEED being too clingy and needy here. She's gone, maybe she comes back, maybe she doesn't. You don't know, no one knows, but what you should know is that you can't wait for her undecisive mind to decide wether or not she's coming back or not.
Leave it on, and move on with your life.

Good points Adilinar. Definitely I took the relationship too seriously when she was holding back because she's going out of town. She's planning on coming back, and she said there won't be anything in the way of our relationship then. Still, I definitely did some damage by being a clingy bitch. She texted me from her new number but refused to fit me in her schedule for the next two weeks; she's keeping me on standby. So fuck her for now, it's totally out of my hands. Got it out of my system, it's a good time to work on inner game. Case closed.

when u said that its case closed make sure it is... had LTR before i joined this site and I was definitely an AFC in terms of behavior and confidence etc... women think that they control us but when u change the way u think and you become confident then you dont really need a relationship to make you feel good about yourself

inner game is more important in life than anything because confidence attracts and when people sense that you are confident they will swarm to you because you are the man and finally you will realise that you dont need her

No really, I'm good now. Thanks for your concern though, really.

were one big family... think of it as a huge human body... when disease affects our inner game we all send antibodies to fix it

Case... reopened... I make myself sick.

She texted me some fluff earlier today and I just outright asked her if she freaked out because I told her I loved her last time I saw her. Apparently she started avoiding me in the first place because I said something offhand that ended with "because I love you" and this apparently triggered her daddy abandonment issues and now she's terrified of me. I think she's telling the truth because I doubt she would've remembered it unless it meant something to her.

She said she should be free tonight and admitted she's just been making BS excuses not to see me this last week. I see a likely flake in my near future. I'm starting to get the impression she might be an actual psycho and might just be totally dicking with me. One thing is for sure though, DO NOT FUCKING TELL THE GIRL YOU LOVE HER FIRST! Keep it to yourself! Lesson learned.

On the plus side, my ego has been restored. I knew there was no way a girl could lose interest in me when I go all out.

If I were you, if you want to still chat to her, return to standard gaming, all lovey dovey shit aside.

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Been there, done it, oh and still doing it!

: Blog entries@ http://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com/

I think I need a fucking intervention. She's really conflicted and wants to avoid me because she doesn't want to get attached when she might end up never seeing me again. All that shit about being scared of my love or whatever is totally irrelevant to the bottom line. I'm really conflicted because I was just making an excuse to try to meet up with her again. Fuck, I wish I wasn't so weak, this is like highschool all over again! You know what, I don't deserve the benefit of the doubt anymore, I'll say this is over when she gets the fuck out of town at the end of the month. Thanks to anyone who's bothered to follow this teenage BS.

"This is a relationship, I'm not asking how to game her. " I totally love this sentence of yours. Can I quote it on my profile?

Anyways, to address your question, if I were you, I would fly with her. Tell her how much she means to you.

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"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

That's a bad idea. She went somewhere cold. I like the sun. This is old news, though, I'm already moving on. If she ends up coming back, I'd consider picking up where we left off, depending where I'm at in August. Quote away.

Don't give up. If she means something to you, sacrifice yourself and go for it.

_________________
"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"