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| Author | Message |
| Se-nob | PostPosted: Sun Nov 01, 2009 9:03 am | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Sun Oct 25, 2009 2:51 pm Posts: 13 | | My ex dumped me last week pretty much out of the blue. I asked her to meet up tonight to talk about why and try get some closure on it. I do want her back though so any tips on how to regain her interest? I'm aware of that phrase "you can't make somebody love you" but sure they're something i can do!
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| jpow1981 | PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 1:19 am | |
| Offline | | Member of MPUA Forum |  | Joined: Wed Oct 21, 2009 4:33 pm Posts: 184 Location: Montreal, Quebec | | Its always so much easier to give advice than to follow it yourself. You can check out my posts if you want to know more about my own situation.
What I would suggest is that if you want to stay with this girl, that you try to assess whether:
1. She has run out of options and thinks this is the only way to get you to change
2. She is running some kind of cruel shit-test on you
3. She really wants to be broken up.
If the answer is that she really wants to be broken up, let me offer up my condolences. The best thing that you can do at that point is to agree with her. Always remember: we seek out that which retreats from us.
From that point, a general freeze-out is advisable not only for your benefit but also if you hope to reconcile.
A serious LTR rarely ends cleanly on the first attempt. Be aware of the possibility of her changing her mind on you, and try to assess the relationship objectively.
Lastly, no matter what she tells you, chances are you won't be satisfied. Just be cautious about going AFC. Don't bombard her for more and more info on her reasons. Try your best to keep it to just the one conversation. She may confuse your attempts at closure for neediness or bargaining--neither of which are attractive in the least, and hinder your chances of getting back together.
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| Se-nob | PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 6:05 pm | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Sun Oct 25, 2009 2:51 pm Posts: 13 | | Cheers for the advice man. Didn't have any luck but I've accepted its over and I'm moving on. More fish in the sea and all that!
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| jpow1981 | PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:53 pm | |
| Offline | | Member of MPUA Forum |  | Joined: Wed Oct 21, 2009 4:33 pm Posts: 184 Location: Montreal, Quebec | | Good for you. I wish I was able to resolve my own breakup as well. Good luck.
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| Lodewijkp | PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 10:30 pm | |
| Offline | | PUA Forum Leader |  | Joined: Sun Jul 12, 2009 4:11 pm Posts: 1887 Location: Netherlands |
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