Long time lurker, first time poster. Hope I can get some advice on this one.

I've been dating this girl for several weeks now, things are going great but she's into clawing, scratching, pain thing and I'm not.

The sex is amazing, but tonight while she was clawing me I lost my hard on, which is kind of fucked up. A little while later we're going at it again, she starts clawing and I lose it once again.

Now I'm wondering how to go about this one. I've told her that I'm just not into the pain thing, but she insists I'll grow to like it. Also it seems almost involuntary on her part, she gets really into it.

How would you handle this one? Pain killers?

dominate her. put her in handcuffs to the bed posts and show her whos boss. thats what girls like that want anyways

DXB12's advice is pretty solid.

Alternatively, you could learn to focus on the pleasure rather than the pain (meaning direct your attention to your dick rather than wherever she is biting, clawing, scratching, etc.)

Most of the time I don't even notice all the bite and claw marks all over my body until the next day when me and my girl inspect my "battle scars" and giggle at the memory.

Look no further than my avatar for an example

Your boy,
870

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My opinion - she's right, you'll learn to like it.

What are you feeling at the moment you lose it - are you thinking "ow, that hurts "? You're not associating it with anything good, that's why.

Try this - punish her by fucking her harder. If you want the pain to stop, you have to drive her to orgasm. If you're getting hurt - that's YOUR fault for not making her orgasm - cause once she orgasms, she'll stop, at least for a little while, right?

The more pain you're in, the more you have to drive her to orgasm. Make yourself believe it's the only way out.

Our mind is the most powerful sexual organ we have, it drives all the others, and we can make it do crazy and amazing things, you can train it. A muscle can get bigger, or leaner, but a brain is more complex, it can form all kinds of crazy patterns.



Here's what you're trying to tap into - there is an element of pain that's tied to sex at a primal level - for example the way the male dog bites the female on the back of the neck so she paralises and arches her back is exactly the same sensation a woman can get when you pull her hair back to make her head drop backwards. Basically there are triggers there to make re-production easier.

in relationshps i think its a good idea to explain what you like and don't like. there's no shame in a personal preference. everyone is different. if the relaitonship is strong, then it will be natural for both of you to want to do what makes the other person reach their "goal" the way they want.