i just found out today that my ex of 2 and a half years is dating 1 of my friends. hes not my closest friend but we would hang out everytime we are partying. shes also put up her headline saying'' someones gotten fat hahaha''. i havent worked out in ages ive a bit of a drinking problem (nothing too serious, ive just had a really rough time thes past few months).

I had a great weekend and was at a party and had my choice of 4 women from good gaming and being alpha because most of the guys were tring to make a show of me coz i was gettin alot of female attention.

And since i found out (off my other buddy today) i feel fukin terrible and i dont know why because i was sure i was over it now i dont feel like gaming or anything. any of u guys go through this? i serious feel the worst ive felt in a long time.

What should i do when i see them together?
and....

Would it be a good alpha thing if i wer to say to her when i see her...

'you could do alot worse than this guy hes the best'??
any help is appreciated. fuck this, i feel bad.

I'm recently in the same situation. It sure hurts when you first find out. REALLY bad.

It's been a few months now, and since they're an active part of my social group, I have no choice but to deal with it.

I don't know how your ex is, but in my case she is friendly and respectful. When we were not dating she treated me like a friend, and on the rare occasion might say or do something flirty, just for fun. She acts no different now. And so I have no excuse to act any different either, regardless of how I feel.

I find that it only hurts when I think about her as having missed a potential date. I find that I don't even care when I'm just out having fun with them all and we're all joking and stuff. So when there's no negativity in my head, I guess what's left is the fact that they're great friends that I have a lot of fun with. They're always happy to see me. And I might even go as far as saying that I feed off the vibe of respect I might be getting from them and everyone else for being so cool about it all.

Overall, I've found that it hurts a lot less over time, and that I learned to appreciate them as good friends.


...I think the thing that makes that easier is when I'm doing my thing, I don't treat them any different. For example, I'm still alowed to tell her to do a sexy pose when taking a picture of her, because I do it to all the girls wether they have boyfriends or not. I goof off in front of people, and they will be some of the people laughing. I take embarassing photos of people, and they might be some of them.

Dont worry about it bro....put her in the past and move on. Right now it might be hard but trust me once you get out there and start dating agian you wont even care!

p.s get in the gym! you can get back in shape and its a great way to feel good about your self.

Good point about the gym. Getting in shape is something anyone can do - and unlike this dating stuff, there's no new mysterious concepts to get your head around - you just keep doing something, and keep it up..

Recently happened to me. What worked here was to really analyze why I was feeling so shitty about the whole situation. For me, it came down to a combination of my ego being hurt and me having a scarcity mentality. My ego was hurt because I felt she had chosen another man over me. I wasn't mad because I was dumped, I was mad because it made me feel like this guy was better than me. Once I had that thought consciously I was able to easily rationalize it away.

The scarcity mentality was me believing deep down that I had MY pussy taken away from me and I'd never get any ever again (again, this was unconscious). The solution here was just to go out and get some female interest. Voila, problem solved.

In the end I ended up reframing it in a very positive way. Remember all the bad times in the relationship? The ones that lead to your breakup? This guy isn't stealing your girl away, he's taking her off your hands. He's doing you a fucking favour by keeping this crazy bitch busy so she doesn't get all up in your grill!

Plus from her snide comments it sounds like she's a vindictive little POS. Try not to waste your time worrying about what some she-devil thinks of you when there's a million nice girls (or naughty, if that's what you like) waiting around the corner.

suppose u guys are right. just gotta make time for the gym now.
im goin out on saturday nite and im gonna have the fuckin time of my life.
because when i go out i know you fuckers are doing the same and im saying ''theyre out sarging all the girls and there will be none left for me haha''. gets me in the mood. thanks for the advice guys.
maybe we'll run into each other 1 day who knows.