You guys just heard the word "threesome" so hoorah, yay, get on it!!!...Right? Let me explain.

Aparently my game didn't do any pausing or backtracking when I began dating this certain girl "Meg" for the better part of 5 or so months. While we were together I was completely faithful and we were in a bonifide "relationship"... well we broke up the day before Valentines Day of this year (interesting timing I know) because I had begun feeling a distance from her and she wasn't quite acting the same and we finally had the DTR talk and she just said she needed to find herself a know herself a little better because when she started dating me, she really didn't grow any personally. This due to the fact that she is a freshman in college and I am a graduating senior this May. We started dating pretty soon after she got to college so it didn't really give her any time to grow, which I can understand and supported because of my experience in college I had done the same at her age. But we stayed on good terms and still talked after the breakup (leave em better than you found em, right guys?) We actually didn't even like the term "breakup" because it was more of a transition phase for us because we wanted to stay in each other's lives. My how things transitioned...

Well about 2&1/2 weeks later, she sent me a text saying that she missed me and I offered to let her hang out...I seriously wasn't thinking anything of it (outcome independent) and I had even already hooked up with another girl that she didn't know about pretty soon after our recent separation. We sat around and started looking at old pictures of the 2 of us when we were going out. The next thing I know, all our clothes are off, and we're doing the deed harder and faster than we ever had...all the while I'm just stunned and surprised that this is even happening. I love this girl I'll be the first to say that, but I thought we were completely done with and she had dropped me, but I didn't even enjoy that hookup I had between our breakup and us getting together again and if anything you can call it a "rebound" because I was still missing Megan and trying to do anything to keep her off my mind.

So here we are, talking the same, fucking the same, and generally being in the same state of being in a relationship as we were before. When we're talking online one night and she brings up the idea of having a threesome with one of her best friends "Lauren"... now she's not bi, but had fooled around and made out with this friend of hers with tops off, as far as I know thats the only thing that had happened between the two. Megan keeps telling me what they want to do to me and how Lauren wants to lick my balls while I'm having sex with Megan and how Megan wants to watch me fuck her best friend...sounds beyond hot and I would love to have this threesome with them...

But something mentally is clouding my mind about this... I didn't realize that "finding herself" seemingly turned her into a sex fiend (she's into rough sex, watching porn together, giving me webcam shows when we're apart, etc) a far cry from the romantic sexy sensual side that we shared while in our relationship. Don't get me wrong, we were very sexual when we were together, and I was actually the first real time she'd ever really had sex (there was a guy in highschool for her but he came, she didn't and didn't enjoy it so she doesn't even count it) So it was basically taking her virginity and now it's just been this huge shift in her thinking. I guess I should be thankful, but it still kinda irks me...

Another thing that really bothers me is that Lauren has a boyfriend too, and Megan asked if I would get as much pleasure out of watching her getting fucked by another guy (in this situation Lauren's BF) as she would out of watching me fuck another girl. I just told her it was different for girls than it was for guys, because if the 2 of them had sex with the same guy, it would probably bring them closer, but if me and a best friend had sex with the same girl, even if it was consensual between the 3 of us, it might break us apart. (I don't know the BF that well so this might not be as big of an issue as I'm making it) Megan even told me she wants me to fuck Lauren when she isn't even there... to "spice up" our sex life... I wasn't even aware it needed "spicing"! Like in a way I feel like me and Megan are still "together" so if she's wanting me to have sex with her best friend when she's not around, what is Megan doing when I'M not around? She said that Lauren wanted to see her boyfriend fucking another girl, so it's like THEY might be having a threesome or Megan might be fucking Lauren's boyfriend without me being there. The idea was also tossed around about having a foursome with Lauren's boyfriend too so we'd each be fucking the other person's relationship partner. Lauren and her boyfriend go to another school so I don't even see them that much, and only met her boyfriend once, so the connection would be more like watching Megan have sex with a stranger...

I know I'm overthinking this too much, am I pulling a double standard card here? I don't know if I thought that I would be the last person she ever has sex with, or that I don't want her to be in pleasure with anyone but me, but I just feel that our relationship really shifted from intimate emotional connection to blatant physical connection only, and that I'm just a part of one of her sexual fantasies now, or that she doesn't need me for anything but sex anymore. Is this some kind of sick and twisted one-itis I'm having here? This just seems like more of a swinger mentality than a relationship mentality. I care about her and about her relationship with Laruen too. So I'm scared about the reprecussions this could entail...

Any advice or a serious reality check is fully welcomed here.

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Happy Hunting Comrades! -Shreder

Just forget anything, relax and don't bother yourself with such a things you're not into

Ok guys I am definitely reading into this far far far too much. I checked their facebook wall posts and about a week ago Meg visited Lauren and the bf at their college, and the posts are all cutsie between the 3 of them (winky faces, interesting remarks about one another) I have reason to believe that they have already messed around or went ahead and had a threesome together. Of course I couldn't straight bring this up with Megan, but I did ask her if she and the bf had ever fooled around and based my questioning on curiosity, and how I wanted everyone to be "in the know" and for everyone to be cool with everyone else about the possibility of a threesome. I even said "between you, me and Lauren or even you, the bf and Lauren" and she just said that they hadn't really talked about it with the bf but they would cross that bridge when they came to it. She also asked me not to say anything to anyone else about it but her (Meg) until she said it was OK to do so. I don't even know these two that well. I even said I wanted to just know the bf better if there was going to be a possibility of a 4some eventually.

Her behavior is just what is bothering me. I mean, people that you know really well can tell how you're acting if they have acted like them before, and shes definitely acting the same really distant way she was the couple of weeks before we broke up. Why is this bothering me so much? Perceived loss? I feel so selfish, which messes with my inner game because I'm always too hard on myself to begin with. (Not the "I'm not good enough" kind of thing, but more that I have character flaws i.e. jealousy, selfishness, overreaction to trivial things) I am even losing sleep over this, and my stomach is in knots. I really want to just focus on more important things in my life that pertain to ME and me only, but this is crowding my mind so much. I should just be ok with her having a great sex life, and even the possibility of sharing it with me, and it's not like she's even cheating with me... Maybe just cheating with my feelings for her. I would like to think that she cares enough to not lie to me either about if they have already done anything.

Guys I'm just at a loss right now. I want a solution to my heart and my mind. The only thing that I have thought of that might help me with this, is to drop her out of my mind, like I did when we broke up and thought it was over for good. We barely talked and when we did is was really surface stuff like "How are you? Oh that's good, have a good day!" kind of crap. But is that mentally dropping her really just a lie to myself, and deep down really hoping that eventually we will get back together? I can't keep dropping and picking her up forever. Maybe I should just cut my losses on this one...which I thought I had done already, and look where I'm at now. I just remain a hopeless romantic. But that is why I'm in the Game to begin with... I want that great relationship, but the emotional battles that go beyond the actual "pickup" almost prevent this, or even when I do get in the relationship, ruin it.

I hope someone sees where I'm getting at with this and can offer any counsel since I've filled in the details a little more about my inner game and the situation. Thanks in advance guys.

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Happy Hunting Comrades! -Shreder