Hi,

Just a quick background, i was dating a girl for 5 years, we had plans to get married very soon.
She would go back home to meet her parents 2x a year, last july she went back and her parents convinced her to marry someone else behind my back. Just to add, she had never met this guy ever before and with enough forcing by her parents she said yes to him.

When she came back she was married and regretted it (supposedly).
Basically,while she was married, we still had sex (around 2x a month) and were in constant touch.
I told her that i would take her back, if she divorced him. She filed the divorce papers 1 month after the marriage and kicked him out the house (sent him back to his country) after 1.5 months of living together.

Now i still do like her, but ofcourse my trust is broken.

Would it be a bad idea if i take her back.. When i say i'd take her back, i mean marry her!

A person not having a brain of their own would be a red flag for me.

Is she middle eastern? Are you from the same place?

nope not middle eastern. We are both different culture.

Interestiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing.


I would already be seeing ten other chicks.

_________________
Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

in the time she was married i did "date" around 7 girls, but just not the same connection.
At one point i was dating 4 chicks at the same time and that becomes too tiring and not enough time for myself.

This women will tire you for life. I suggest you run.

_________________
Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

Thank you.
When you say "This woman will tire you for rest of your life", it literally hit me in the head. Last 5 years has been VERY tiring now that I think of it. Just an emotional rollercoaster.

Very nervous that im meeting her mum tomorrow, I want to totally end it with her.. but they expecting me to marry her! They even kicked out the husband and filed divorce already!

LOL WUT, this whole thing sounds like some sort of bizarre Indian move!

Like someone mentioned, if she has no brain she will be a pain. You should of let her stayed married and move on. If you guys connect so well why did she marry someone else (regardless of parents/culture).

Plus you gonna inherit in laws who convinced your girlfriend to marry another guy, that will be a great family for sure.

Best thing to do if you still unsure take a chill pill and do your own thing for frew months, then see if it's still feels right to take her back.

Don't be a fool man.. It was not so much the "connection" that you didn't feel with the other girls. Im sure this situation and the torn ego was on your mind the entire time making it truly difficult to connect with another person beyond the surface since you're emotionally still fixated on someone else.

I'm sure you still had your reasons for liking her buy marrying someone by force all while still in a relationship with a guy for 5 years? And now she's going to try something new, realize it was a bad idea and you're going to wash away her sins and pretend it never happened?

Whats her super power? Because if she's human like the rest of them, I don't understand whats in this for you. She got the best of both worlds and now gets to have her happy ending, and you're going to give it to her?

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Totally sounds like an Indian soap opera.

lol no indian soap opera, not even indian lol, Im English, girl was Russian.

Update:
Her mother came over, invited me for dinner.
I couldnt eat because it wasnt my preference of food, yes im picky.
Her mother started talking about me and the girl, and i told them and was VERY firm I cannot marry her.
The mother started crying etc, and she said, the girl will be going home to treat some medical condition she has, which i do not want to mention here.

Then at the end gave me the keys to her flat to make sure everything is ok whilst she has gone away.

The girl keeps being distant from me, but then asked me when shes meeting my parents. She doesnt say things like babe etc, or anything intimate. Havent slept with her in 3 weeks. The only thing ive got in terms of physical with her in last 3 weeks was a 10 second make out session because she was worried her mum was in the flat.

Just to add, her mum even invitied me to her house abroad, which i respectfully declined as I have other things to do. And then she offered me to take the girl on holiday, just me and the girl, and the mother would offer us their holiday home :S.

Its left me very confused, because the girl herself is being a bit distant from me, i.e. doesnt even say anything intimate etc. So im not sure whether shes giving me a shit test, or making me chase after her...

Btw, I met her and her mother 3 times in last 7 days.

Theres a solid article called " Why You Shouldn't Care When She Cries During A Break Up" - Go google it.

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It wasnt the girl who was crying, it was the mother.