Hey, i'm gonna try to not make this a super long story for your own sake, im going to try and sum it up as short as i can

-Have girlfriend, im first guy she ever fell in love with, has really strong feelings towards me, i really like her too, we have the time of our lives basically

-She told me something that was kind of "too much information". Basically told me she had sex with a huge bbc once and it was a really bad experience, it fucked with my head even tho i know she enjoys our sex more and likes my size more ( I made a topic about this recently)

-The information is starting to eat up on me, everytime i see her i think about that situation, i start to visualize it happening in front of me (This happens automaticly) i get really unhappy, she knows about this and try's to help me with every way possible and is really kind and helpfull

-With friends, drinking alcohol and more mind altering substances (The ones that can fuck with your mind basically). I text her (in a nice way) that i can't deal with it anymore, she has to get her stuff and that our relationship is over unfortunately

-She comes to get her stuff, is really upset (obviously). Is really mad, starts calling me names, i grab her by her shoulders (in a normal way, nothing agressive, done it before) and start to look at her and tell her to please calm down

-She kicks me, i kick her back out of reaction, wasn't hard for my feeling

-She slaps me, i slap her back out of reaction again, again this wasn't anything hard, it is/was probably more the shock effect that got her

-She starts crying, tells me she hates me etc. etc., takes her stuff and leaves

-I text her the next day, appologizing and stuff, asking if she wants to come and talk, she says she isn't interested


I don't know what to do now, this is probably the most stupid thing i've ever done in my life, im not talking about hitting and kicking her back (that too) but also the fact i broke up with her for a stupid reason, this is not how a man should behave

I'm wondering if you guys think this situation is fixable, keep in mind she is( or was now) crazy in love with me..

I am also sure this will be a very hard lesson for me and that things like this will never happen again.. Even if she doesn't want me back this will stay with me forever..

My own thought was: Give it a few days of rest, text her in a week asking if she wants to talk to see if we can work things out (She seemed more upset about breaking up than the situation that happened after that). If she declines at that point i will see it as a lost cause and leave her alone.

After you kicked her and hit her, why do you think she should let this blow over and forgive you? What's going to be worse for you is when she starts telling people what you guys were fighting about. Would you ever be comfortable around her friends knowing that you were insecure about your dick size?

It was a reaction towards her kicking and hitting me, i had no control over myself at that time, i should have just let her kick/hit me once, then as soon as i noticed she used psychical force on me leave ASAP and don't talk to her

I didn't hit/kick her back hard,


She also didn't block me on anything yet, she still has me on her text message list, today she texted me about some party i was going to that i "Shouldn't do any stupid things there" or something

It seems to me that if one is completely done with another person that this behaviour won't happen, she would just probably delete him and get it over with? Or am i wrong here

Sometimes we want to keep an eye on the other person to justify how bad they are. It gives more justification to not want you anymore when you are begging for her to come back.

Don't be biased. She hit him first. Fact that he retaliated is neither here nor there. You can't go around slapping people expecting nothing in return because you're under the protection of being a woman.
It's a fairly disgusting double standard.
The actual stupidest thing this thread has to offer is not you hitting her back, or breaking up for a stupid reason. It's the fact that you go so incredibly insecure about your girlfriends sexual history.
I mean for fucks sake, dick size? I can maybe see a problem if she had some sort of 1 female 5 males orgy or something equally fucked up. But this? She fucked a guy with a big dick, didn't even enjoy it, and you couldn't handle that?

Here's a fun fact. If you're sporting anywhere over 5-6 inches you're more than capable of fully pleasuring 95% of women out there. If you're over 8, that same 95% will not be having a good time with your monster dick tearing them up from the inside.

Anyway, even if you do get her back, your relationship is tainted. Lines have been crossed. You can never unbreak a glass. And if you glue it back together it's just a matter of time until it shatters again.

You need to work on your insecurities so that this doesn't manifest again with the next girl.

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It is a double standard and it doesn't matter that it's very unfair to men. If his girlfriend tells the story to anyone he will be labeled. Unless he has marks on him the girl always wins if he hits her. It's the way of the world. You guys have got to be smarter because you are stronger than us physically and expected to be stronger mentally because we are more emotional. If his girlfriend tells this story exactly the way it is then he looks like he's insecure because of he thinks he has a small penis, emotionally unstable because he couldn't handle it so he kicked her out, and when she got emotional over it and reacted he hit her.

Sometimes it sucks to be a guy.

Sure, didn't argue that.

What I'm saying is that his retaliation isn't even the main problem. If there's a prime reason for her not to forgive him, that's not hitting her back. It's him being so prone to insecurity in the first place.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Honestly, if one of my girls told me the story and left out the part about the hitting then I would ask her why the fuck did she tell him that story? Then we'd joke about his insecurity and tell her to go apologize but we'd never forget about how insecure he was about it and that may come to haunt him later. It's putting his hands on her that turns him into the bad guy.

Tell her to apologize for what? Fucking a guy that happened to have a big dick?
I don't think it's a woman's job to wrap her man in a protective bubble. I think it's the man's job to not need it.

If I were you I'd tell the friend to cut ties too learning he laid hands. But I'd tell her to cut ties even without that part.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Apologize for telling him about the details. Boyfriends get insecure about finding out that a guy with a bigger dick than him had sex with their girlfriend. If she would have told the guy in this situation about a guy with a tiny penis then you know this story wouldn't have been an issue. But most guys have to believe that they are the biggest penis and the best sex that she's ever had. Women can wrap a man around our fingers if we play to his ego but if we bruise it then guys lose their shit.

Yes i agree..

As i said, this girl is completely in love with me, we have had this "dick size" problem for a few days/weeks now and she tried to help me

I even tried telling her about Jelqing and how it works (no idea if it does) and that if she wants me to do that ill happily do it, she said she doesn't want me to do that at all so that was kind of the confirmation for me that my size is enough

I'm wondering, R.C, what would you do or what do you think i should do in this situation to try and make things right again? Anything specific i should say for example

He's already told you: you screwed up. Just leave it alone, seriously. Or you'll give her even more embarrassing stories to tell about you.

I strongly disagree with RC on this one.

I get that some of factions of the feminist movement have soured the taste for many males on what equality looks like. But there reality is MOST men are far stronger than the average woman. That said, toe-to-toe the woman 9x out of 10 will suffer the brunt of a physical altercation.

That said, I do believe in the protective use of force. If your life is in danger then I would fully expect you to protect yourself using any means necessary.

As Charity pointed out, there's also the legal implication of him having touched his partner. If she does have any marks, and she decides to escalate things it can, and often, involves the law. In fact, a woman merely complaining that she feels unsafe around a male can create all sorts of implications for you. She can get a no contact order, or a restraining order and you will be known to police even if no charges are laid. You've got to be smarter than this and control your anger.

When physical violence occurs, unfortunately (like psychological abuse) it becomes easier. The fact that your relationship has de-evolved to such a state is beyond unhealthy. I would recommend that the two of you seek counselling, or you do so on your own to deal with some of your anger issues before this spirals further out of control.