I'd like to respond to her quickly.

So I wrote a birthday message to a mutual friend, Adelina, which said,

"Happy Birthday huni :*"

Then out of the blue, about an hour later I get this facebook message;

Girlfriend
“your huni? I don t believe it all that time you were flirting behind my back, I should have guessed, you desappoint me. you're like all other jerk I knew, you don t deserve me my love and trust. do not talk to me ever again. I hate yu.”

Me (3way)
“seriously you trust me that little?
Ask Adelina if you want. I've barely spoken to her”

Girlfriend
“go to hell
no baby i don t want to bother you sweet little huni”

Me (3way)
“it was a happy birthday message
I haven't spoken to the girl this year
yes it was slightly flirtatious but I'm not cheating on you. I don't cheat.”

Girlfriend
“come on i m not that stupid you did n t talk to her and you call her huni”

Me (3way)
“Ons you told Maher you loved him in one of your messages.
I'm not cheating on you
It was just a flirtatious comment”

Me (3way)
“I shouldn't have to explain myself this much. I don't cheat.”
Girlfriend
“maher is one of my best friend is in relationship with one of my dearest friend”

Me (3way)
“and adelina has a boyfriend”
Girlfriend
“you can ask him if you want and in arabic i like you and i love you are the same it depends on the context”

Me (3way)
“I have no problem with your comments it was just a joke.
So was mine
I have no problem with your comments”

Girlfriend
“she is your your huni and your dear i can t believe it
how many girls are your huni i m curious”

Me (3way)
“I can't believe your acting this way over a simple birthday message.”

Girlfriend
“it s not a simple fucking birthday meassage
you called her your huni
you don t respect me”

Me (3way)
“Ask the girl when the last time is that I spoke to her. I can't talk to you when your like this.”

Girlfriend
“don t ever talk to me again unless your faithful”

My considered response is,

I do respect you and I respect myself more than to cheat on any girl. I also respect you more than to talk to you the way you have just talked to me. You have also cheated on me in the past and the only reason why I did not walk away was because of the distance between us [we were long distance at the time]. I understand that your cousin and your friend's situations are difficult to deal with right now but I am not cheating on you and that does not give anyone the right to talk to me like this.

The other factor is her cousin (who is like a sister to her) caught her fiancée in bed with a guy last week and my gf's best friend's was cheated on a few weeks before. Still completely unacceptable that she talked to me this way.

Please give me the best advice on how and when to respond.

Stop responding. You sound like a little bitch. You tried to calmly and briefly explain once, she obviously lacks trust and is VERY insecure. F*ck that chick.

_________________
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@TheMAGblog

She sounds delightful.

Very trusting too.

Playboi_ is right. You explained it - like an adult (well the first time, till you kept going and going and going)... it's her problem now.

And fuck.... don't send that 'considered reply' - it's awful.

Just go cold.

Girlfriend of 3 years, I'm not just going to delete her.

Was I really that bitchy? I thought I did ok considering the rapid response.

3 years and she is pissed like this? Over honey? She cheated on you.... you said honey to a chick and she is dumping YOU?

It sounds from all the threads on this chick the relationship is broken.

How long should I wait before responding?

I'd give her a few days, myself...

And then I wouldn't respond via text. You two are acting like children on text.

Call her or do it in person.

Waiting a few days may also give her the opportunity to realize she's being a dumb cunt.

I'm going to approach her with this if she doesn't reply in a few days time - by phone or in person.

I will say,

"There's no excuse for you to talk to me the way you did, especially considering that you have cheated on me."

Now, you are throwing past "resolved" issues back on the fire. That will end the argue meant very smoothly hahaha. She'll probably go get some strange dick that night in spite. You are not in the wrong if you explained the scenario accurately. Shut up and continue your life. Fuck how long you've been with a girl. That means she gets to have more random men enter her and get away with it more times than a shorter relationship? Man up.

_________________
FREE Confidence Ebook:https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/487644

Motivation, Attitude and Growth! The MAG Blog
http://wearemag.blogspot.com/
@TheMAGblog

Next.

WTF. I'm guessing you are from UK.

People here call each other love, honey etc all that kind of shit.

I don't even understand why you got into an argument. After your first message to her where you explained that you didn't do anything wrong I wouldn't have responded anything to her.

And besides there is nothing flirtatious sending a girl a birthday message. I'm wondering how could you put up with this girl for 3 years...

I had a plate blow up at me once when she found out I was sleeping with one of her friends too (no, we were never monogamous, and she's always known that). The text convo started pretty much like yours, but after the first couple of rage-filled messages I responded with:

Me: "Stop. Listen to me. I understand that you're upset. I get that. But right now you have a choice. You can either spit, scratch and burn bridges, or you can put your phone down, take a couple of deep breaths, go for a walk or something, and calm the fuck down. When you're ready to talk again just let me know, we'll forget this ever happened."

She sent a few more rabid responses which I ignored.

Two days later she texts me and says.

Her: "I'm so sorry for blowing up at you like that. I'm just so tired of her [the friend I'm seeing] stealing all my friends. But it wasn't fair of me to take it out on you like that. I lost my cool and you stood there and took it like a man. I hope we're still cool."

Me: "No worries, it was forgiven the moment it happened. Hey, my friend Mike is spinning trance at [some place] tomorrow. Want me to pick you up on my way?"

Her: "That sounds great!"

I can just tell you to dump her and move on, but I'm going to throw in the harsh truth first.

When she first started the argument, it was clearly her fault.

You tried to explain yourself, and you sounded needy as fuck. For everything's sake...you guys sounded like first graders fighting over a dildo. What were you thinking in the first place?

You want me to hand it to you on a golden plate? She's putting the relationship at risk. This girl has either cheated on you and is feeling too guilty to talk so she throws the blame on you for ruining the relationship, or the relationship in the past few couple of weeks/days is having a lot of tensions (she's talking to someone, you're getting too flirty with girls and she's too childish to handle it and let it sink in, something is going on in her life, etc...). Whatever it is, and how weird it's going to sound from me, you should've fucked her good that night you argued. Next time you tell her to meet and you fuck her, because a true man sticks to actions, and not words.

For now, you should see her and I'm sure having been in a relationship for 3 years, you'd already know if she's down to fuck or is just childish as hell and you need to dump her already.

Your choice.

For someone that hasn't done anything wrong, you sure seem to be explaining yourself a lot.