I posted this thread a little while back

- had-a-random-surge-of-confidence-today- ... 72653.html


Tl;dr - Saw a girl I found cute, asked her out, made her blush, could tell she was attracted to me. Ever since I've discovered my new found confidence I no longer feel hopeless. When you feel hopeless, obsessions are meaningless because you know you'll never take action. Now that I have taken action, I feel like it is truly in my control now.


Update Present Day - I saw her again for the first time since I posted that. She saw me, immediately smiled and looked down. She's got a twin sister who froze up and started twirling her hair and got all nervous. I guess what I'm saying is - I know I have some element of attraction towards these girls.

But as all obsessions go (and this is the ironic bit), you're usually not obsessing over the best looking/hottest girl.

No, this girl is just cute.... I don't even know her personality. In my head, I'm building her up to be something she's not. I want to stop thinking about her, I want to put this to rest. I know that she's taken, but I'm still constantly thinking about her. I know it sounds pathetic, but I simply CANNOT get her out of my head. I do a ton of productive stuff still, but this is making it feel like it's crippling me.


ANY help would be awesome.

Oh and don't say "Find another girl". To me that's like saying "Just choose another drug instead". It's not just the girl, it's the addiction and obsession as a whole. It's not healthy, for any girl.

:/ anyone?

Well, the best cure is to get other girls.

I met a really hot girl recently, and then the next day I went out and got another girl's number. Build up your options and have the choice of who you date exclusively if that's what you are aiming for.

Seriously, obsessing over this girl will not get her. So saying "dont tell me to get another girl" is basically saying you don't want to be helped.

Why can't you just go for her?

Boyfriend concept is bullshit these days. No one commits enough until marriage, and most marriages are failing these days. She might have chose to have a boyfriend so she doesn't feel lonely, so be her new boyfriend. Make a move or move on.

That's the thing, the next day I saw her I paid her another compliment (Whether or not that is how you pick up, I'm just being honest, I did) and then asked for her number. She hesitated for so long before she said she couldn't. I know for a fact that she was attracted, but she was loyal I suppose.

You want what you can't have, and that drives me insane.

It is really creepy to be obsessed over a girl you don't even know. Are you under 16? How many girls have you met recently? Are you getting laid?

How exactly is it creepy? Pretty sure it was basic human nature. Found the girl attractive, tried to ask her out, I want what I can't have. Can't really say I'm the only one who's been through this.

And to be honest, that's why I posted here. I'm caught up in that stupid mindset that "This is the only girl I can ever like". And you hear about that all the time and how illogical it is.

You used the word "obsessed." Nothing wrong with finding someone attractive, but if you can't stop thinking about a girl you haven't really spoken to, that's not human nature. You're not a girl, you're a man. And men don't go obsessing over a one girl, especially strangers.

You're obsessed over a stranger.
Again...you're OBSESSED over a STRANGER. This is creepy. If you tell her this honestly, she will look at you like you're crazy. If you tell any girl about her, they will look at you crazy. As you said, it's not healthy. And yes, you hear about the same thing on here alot. That's from guys who have crossed into the creeper category. Anytime you want a girl more than she wants you, or in most cases, she doesn't even want you and you're ready for a relationship with her, you're close to being a creeper. If you're banging chicks and have better options, you're not going to be thinking about random girl at the store.

I'm going to agree with neo here. This is creepy. Look, we don't want to go harsh on you, we're just telling the truth. Last time I was obsessed over a girl I barely knew was when I was like 16. And I didn't get laid until I was 18, so even if you don't get laid, it's still not normal to be obsessed over strangers.

"You want what you can't have"-->based on that logic, I'd say you should be obsessed about Emma Watson, Eva Longoria, Angelina Jolie, Katy Perry, etc... You get the point.

Your obsession is not the result of the inability to get her. It's a result of a counterproductive mindset, that you think you need one specific girl, and once you have her, your entire life will be fixed. And this is why gaming other women will fix your problem.

_________________
"Bros before hoes"

Relationship guide: extended-relationship-guide-vt170687.html

http://wayoftheplayer.com/become-a-player/instinct

Well I mean who the hell likes to be called creepy? I'm not some dude peering into windows or going out to buy random shit just to run into this girl, it's not like. I think that since I worked up the confidence to say something to her, that's the best I've ever really done, so I'm fixated on the one girl I actually had the courage to talk to, because no other girls have even come close.

I dunno, creepy is just insulting LOL.


The thing is, I have such an addictive personality, luckily, most of my life it's been focused on highly productive things. I'm afraid that if I game girls, I'll be addicted. Not that I'll be good, but addicted.

What did you want from posting? A way to get her? I told you the reality of it; it's creepy, hopefully it springs you back to reality and gets you to move on. I'd rather you be addicted to gaming girls, than addicted to one stranger. If you don't want to be obsessed with her, find other girls. Hotter girls, single girls and girls who are actually interested (I'm highly doubted she and her twin are, sounds more like the nervous glances are due to you hitting on her). I'm not one to be delusional and think that a guy who is obsessed with one stranger gets cute twins hot and bothered. If you're obsessed about her, odds are you lack options and this is shown by your body language, style etc. I had a friend who never got laid and he would keep telling people about the way girls would blush and get nervous around him because they wanted him. Went out with him once and soon realized the "blushing" and "glances" were because he made girls uncomfortable and had no chance. This is not to be mean, but just my perspective. Find other women. If you really believe this cute girl likes you but the problem is she is taken, shouldn't be a problem to find a cuter one that's single right?

Well, personally I didn't want to say that you're a creep, just that this irrational obsession of yours is creepy. I know it's a subtle difference, but it's there. And you put this in the relationship section when you hardly know her. How the hell should we NOT consider that creepy?

About that fear of addiction... Gaming is highly productive. You get to know a lot of people, you will be a generally more social, and more fun human being. You're improving yourself, how is that not good for you? Every self-concious, sexual men is "addicted" to gaming, as you put it. Even when I'm in a relationship, I can't help but make the day of that cute cashier by making her laugh, or I can't help but flirt out of fun with some female friends. It's nothing serious, it's just the way I am. Can't see a way how this can negatively affect me. So this fear of yours is based on what? I might have misunderstood you, if that's the case, please clarify what are you afraid of exactly that you don't want to game multiple women. Because right now it seems like it's just your mind trying to keep you inside your comfort zone.

_________________
"Bros before hoes"

Relationship guide: extended-relationship-guide-vt170687.html

http://wayoftheplayer.com/become-a-player/instinct

Confidence- crushed. Lol

Thread Title:
I'm obsessed and I need someone to bring me back to reality.

Lol what did you expect? Better your confidence is crushed than you see something that isn't there, keep pushing her every day and then get security involved. I don't know, she could like you. But if you think so, what's stopping you from getting girls her league or better?

The next girl you fuck will put her out of your mind, so get out there.

There are girls everywhere and none of them are going to spit acid in your face for saying "hi" no matter where it is. I slept with a girl I met on a bus journey ffs.