Ok this is the situation

Met a girl and have an open relationship with her for 9 months we both really liked each other however she had to go home country hence why it was open

I went and visited her in her country 4 months ago and will be seeing her next week in mine

we have a don't ask don't tell policy however she (Not me) wants to end that next week by telling each other if we have been sleeping/ or seeing anyone else


I have kissed many girls (5) however have slept with none.There was a Spanish girl who got really close and she knows this however nothing happen as I stopped it. I still think she thinks that something did happen. The Spanish girl was a HB9


I want to keep her chasing and interested.

Should I tell her I slept with the Spanish girl and tell about the other girls now

Or should I tell her the truth

advice needed

Hell no.

Tell the truth unless you nailed that chick. You either keep her guessing or you flat out tell her you didn't fool around with anyone. Don't even tell her you made out with anyone. Lie. Through. Your. Teeth.

But will it not make her interested and jealous if she knows that other girls are chasing me.

I don't want to hurt this girl as I really like her.... I sense that she has not been with anyone else during our time apart even though I would not mind if she had

More replies please

No. It will make her mad and upset her. She'll get jealous but jealousy is a nasty, manipulative weapon to use. Don't ever use jealous. It's like an atom bomb... Use it and you'll get a result but the damage will be there long after it's over and done with. Conversely, don't ever trust a woman that actively tries to make you jealous. Those relationships are doomed.

You know what she'll do when she's away? She'll feel guilt free and probably actively seek out other guys to get on an even playing field as you.

Don't tell her. Lie about it. It's completely okay to lie about it here: She wanted an open relationship but under the "Don't ask, don't tell" logic. You're just saving her feelings here. Either she wants to know because 1) She's curious. 2) She's been with someone else or been tempted or 3) She really likes you and wants to know you've not been with other people.

Now, if she were to move back and it wasn't an open relationship I wouldn't suggest cheating or being with anyone else... but if you did, just lie about it too. It's stupid to fess up here regardless of what she says or leads you to believe. Even if she turns around and says she's been with someone else and feels guilty about it: Bit your god damn tongue! This puts you on the higher ground!!