Problem: my girlfriend is incredibly good at guilt tripping me into doing things we have disagreements over. If I want to do X, and she wants to do Y (and there is no way to compromise) she'll first go on a huge sales pitch explaining why Y is better than X. Then, if that still doesn't work, she'll gradually start whining, and then ramp it up to crying. So of course I feel bad and I give in. And if I don't give in I just feel like a total asshole. But then I'll have buyer's remorse and feel like a total tool. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. I feel like she's a master manipulator. I feel like I'll be a bad parent because I won't be able to say no to a crying toddler.

Thoughts on this?

I was in your shoes before. The constant internal fight between emotions and rational thought, that was constantly going on inside my head, took a huge toll on me in terms of time, energy and emotional investment.

Looking back now, I would say - let someone else deal with all that bullshit.

Edit: she knows perfectly well what she's doing and although you may be able to maintain your position thus making her respect you more - you are still investing much more of your valuable time and energy then needed. You must be truly indifferent towards her behavior for this to work.

She is manipulative. She loves herself and getting her way more than you.

The truth is that if you do not cave every time, she will have more respect for you. Otherwise you are just a puppet on her strings.

In the event that she doesn't respect you for failing to give her her way every single time, then your life is better off without her. I'm not saying NEVER give her what she wants, just don't ALWAYS cave. Stick your ground on the things that mean a lot to you. Give ground on the stuff that doesn't.

vhou is spot on. As soon as you cave to the crying, she knows this is your achilles heel.

Dump her if she keeps doing it.

THIS, ignore the crying almost every woman can control it at will

Ignore Her