Hi,

At the end of last summer I met a girl from my city but who primarily resides in a different city for University. After two meetings on nights out we ended up sleeping together at her friends family home after the second night out.

Anyway we stayed in touch sporadically in the months between through facebook and I anticipated a friends with benefits situation or something more in the future. At this point I was having a reasonable amount of success going out and sleeping with other women (none as attractive as this girl). Over Christmas we bumped into eachother a few times and she usualy ended up at my place. Unfortunatly, her best friend kind of comes as part of the packadge and goes back to mine everytime she does meaning that the blissful situation get's ruined by the early morning.

Luckily this problem was solved when my SPAM decided to 'take one for the team' and start sleeping with the friend. The girl has been back in the area quite often this year and we've had a number of nights out with the two girls staying at our flat.

The problem occured last time which was four weeks ago. After seeing eachother in town we spent the night in the club together, came back to mine and had sex all night, fine. The next day, however, the four of us are chilling in my friends room for what was expected to be a few hours but turned out be the whole night. Although there was no pressure put on them to hang around, the girl was evidently bored of my company by late sunday night and seemed reluctant to move into my room with me and when she did there was no sex that night.

Things got more ridiculas when the pair of them go out on Monday night (me and my SPAM stayed in), boycott the night early and turn up at our flat drunk and unnannounced. Although, conversation was fine this evening, the girl was once again distant and nothing happened between us.

Do you think the novelty of the situation has wore off completely for her? I have started to get strong feelings for this girl but I haven't done anything blatently needy or stupid to ruin the situation, maybe I am subconciously converying how much I like her? I think these heightened feelings are a result of spending significant time with the girl and realising we get along as well as my general pulling form being in a slump resulting in neediness etc.

I am likely to see this girl in the near future, I am hoping enough time would have passed for things to return to what they once where, how would you play it?

Thanks and sorry for the long post.

I would not make a big deal out of it, act like nothing happened and assess the situation. Soft next if she continues to turn down your advances.