I need your opinions to get my ex back



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PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:06 am 
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Joined: Sun Feb 24, 2013 4:58 am
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Hi everyone.



I need advices obviously,you may able to answer to some questions I have but first read which is following....



I dated my ex for about 3 months,she boke up with me about 1 months ago now....When she broke up with she chose to tell it to me face to face rather than sending a sms or phoning me up,before she had to tell me I was feeling that something would arise.So we met up in a bar and I listened up to what she told me I was really quiet, settled ...after she told me she didn t want to keep on seeing me (she said we were different and that and she wasn t feeling it)she stayed with me for dinner then after dinner we decided that we would stay friends.



After the break up within the following 2days ,I started to realised that I was acting needy with her,I started to be I think dependant of her ,I then realised not just with her but that I was dependant of things around me for my well being,I was loosing control of my environment basically and that the only thing to do was to come back I mean to be the only one responsible for my well being and It started to do simple things again like cooking for me ,cleaning up more often my flat going more often to the gym...what I did!

The day just after the break up I just sent her a facebook request that she accepted within 1 hour time.I decided to do not contact her for a while,then after 5 days I received a phone call from her ...When I picked up she hang up!I sent her a message asking her if she tried to contact me and she replied it was a mistake and asked by the how have I been ...I replied that I was back to the gym and that I was cooking again,then she replied that we should meet up in the next couple of weeks.

I messaged her my availability and asked her 'to make a pick!'.

She picked up the valentine s day to meet up again.

I organised to meet her up in a restaurant-When I met her up and asked me if I was well I told her that I realised I went tru weird time with myself(explaining her what I wrote above) but without including her in the process and without calling the reasons of the break up.

Over that evening we talked about light matters ,we were laughing etc...to some stage she asked my mind about some of her concerns.At the end of the dinner we stayed taliking to each other even after the waiter cleared the table.When we got out of the restaurant I told her I would take a cab back home and she said she would stayed with me until I find one..we kept on talking and at the moment I found a cab to tell her goodbye I kissed her on the cheeks.

3days later I was about to go off for 4days in another town for leisure,I sent her a message asking her to go to watch a movie when I come back(over valentine s day she suggested me to watch a movie she had already seen that I hadn t ), she said yes -then 4 days after when I came back we had few drinks and talksand went to watch this movie,at the end of the movie same storie I had to find a cab and there were some just where we watch the movie but that time she told me that I could find one just opposite her place-basically I understood she wanted me to walk her back home-finally pretty close to her door we realised that there were no cabs .She told me she didn t want to leave me alone untill I find a cab ,I told her I was alright and that I would find one next street after I get her to her door...So we got there in front her door I mean and I decided to kiss her on lips ,So we kissed,she gave my kissed back and smile as we were kissing.to some stages she stood back and told me 'see you soon ' with a shivering voice and I replied back have a good night and walked off .(there were a female friend sleeping to hers that night).



It happened 3 days ago I didn t contact her and she didin t contact me either,her parents are visiting her untill today.

Now I d like to have your mind about everythings...



Am I doing well so far ?

I wanted to wait a bit prior to contact her again like another 3 or 4 days what do you reckon?

Is ther any tips you can give me?

thanks for your replies


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 4:28 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2013 4:39 pm
Posts: 231
I think your doing fine. If it was me, i would continue what you are doing. Might consider a Soft Next right now, only contact her next after she has contacted you, sms, phone, etc....remember dont chase her and she will continue to want more.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 5:45 pm 
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Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2011 12:54 am
Posts: 18
Meh, I dont know man... It sounds to me like you are being too easy and available.... You didn't blow her off not even once aparently...

I mean, she broke up with you man. She said you were too different, and was kinda definitive about it... Now she probably feels some kind of void (possibly not even YOUR void - just the void of whatever your role represented to her), and these meetings sound to me like shes just consciously or unconsciously using you because she doesn't understand/like what shes feeling.

I dont know what should be your move man. The only thing I know is that the easiest you go back to her, or the more available you are whenever she calls you: the less of a life you look like you have, the more you risk looking like a beta/looser, and the easiest she will dump you again.

Do what you do, just don't let her even remotely toy with you man.

All the best!


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