Okay so first of all I am going to start out by saying that I know I am whipped and know I have messed up. I have been in a sort of relation ship with this girl for the past 4 or 5 months. When I first met her she was happily with her boyfriend but I knew I was sort of interested in her and her in me. I used things that I have learned from this site to become her friend and eventually escalate it from there. I had her begging for me and she immediately broke up with her boyfriend of almost a year to be with me. At this point I really started to like her and from here I started loosing it. I started being clingy and needy and doing literally everything you're not supposed to do. She still liked me though but the problem was and still is that she can not get over her old boyfriend. We started getting intimate but all while her ex was still hanging around. She still texted him and hung out with Jim occasionally. This bothered me like you would not believe and I unfourtanatly showed her that and she kept saying that she was going to get rid of him and end things for good and for me to just give her time and that she wanted to be with me and blah blah blah. So I waited and for Christmas I spoiled her with gifts and so did her ex and she kept putting off breaking up with him. A little bit after Christmas was the time where I started gettingkind of annoyed at the whole situation aand one day I told her that she needs to choose who she wants to be with. She said that she can't break up with him no matter if she wants to or not and so we were broken up for not even a day and here I am begging for her back and being my clingy self and we eventually did get back to where we were


Since then the has broken up with me and gotten back with me well over 12 times. I know she really wants to be with me and always talked about our future and kids and all of that and how much she loves me not to mention that I am so much smarter and better looking and just generally better than her ex. The only problem s that I have such a hard time not caring. I freak out so easily and I over think everything. I am not going to lie it is all my fault I have messed this up. She has played me so well and has done everything on this site and has played ever game in the book with me and I have fallen for it all. I know that for her to still even been interestes in me after all I have messed is that she really does love me.

Fast forward to recently..... She broke up with me yet again. Now. Have learned that whenever I ask her how we are compared to her and her ex she breaks up with me regardless of what she wants. The only difference this time is that I pretended not to care. I just said okay I understand and then didn't talk to her and started talking to other girls. She realized this and freaked out and called me the next day just to talk to me. I just talked as if we were friends and I talked about how she was back with her ex and pretended like it didn't bother me and I was happy for them and she started to break down crying. For the past few days we have talked non stop and she has started getting clingy and saying how she wants to have sex with me and marry me and have kids with me and everything. I never completely accepted her back and didn't act like I was desperate for her back and you could tell that that bothered her so much because she was so used to me being clingy and wanting her so bad. Everything was going great for me.

Ow, here is where I mess up big time. So tonight we were talking like we normally were and I said something about me and her ex and how it bothered me. I was upset at this point just thinking about the whole situation and told her that I had to go and that I'd call her back. I called back about an hour later and she was crying and I asked what's wrong and she said nothing and that she wanted to be alone right now. I said okay and goodnight and we hung up. This naturally bothered me very much and Iddidn't know what to do because I didn't know if something I said hurt her or what so I called her back a little later and tried to talk to her and she just got really mad at me and said that she just wanted to be alone and hung up. I started freaking out thinking of all of these possibilities of what happened and I was so convinced that she was going to end thing with me for good and I stupidly called her again and asked what was wrong and we got into a big argument about how she just needs space right now and she wouldn't tell me what was wrong and we started to get bad and she eventually told me that she just broke up with her ex for good so she could finally be with me. I was kind of shocked at this and didn't know what to say and then she was still mad at me and wanted to hang up and go to bed but I didn't want her to go to bed mad at me so she eventually gave up and let me apologize and then said goodnight and immediately hung up. I feel like I ruined my chances with her once again by being stupid and needy and clingy. I am usually never like that to people at all but I am so much for her I dont know why. I am so mad at myself I'm sick to my stomach and don't know what to do. Should I not initiate any contact with her tomorrow? Help me please!

Alright so I want to provide some extra information and apologize for the rambling and anything else that's not clear. We have not done anything serial for a couple of months now and she has not done anything with her ex from the time they originally broke up. I do not mind when she is clingy to me and she knows that. She also plays so many games with me that I just can't seem to keep up or keep on top. I always end up begging for her back and I am not going to lye I have a very hard time not being clingy to her just because I liker her and want to be with her so much. I need advice on how to keep my comosure and not freak out and over things everything and do things that I immediately regret. thank you!

Dude, what a drama... Do you even PUA? My gosh man!

The solution is actually simple. Read a PUA book. I dont even know how you managed to get this girl, because you clearly have not understood the fundamentals. So yeah, a PUA book is what you need.

But anyway, being that theres too much wrong with you to say anything, ill tell you two obvious things: One, you have a severe case of "oneitis", and you make her your "all and everything", and you probably have very little or no game going on with any other girls. So the advice for this side of your problem is to HAVE A LIFE, have friends and hang out with them and hit on other gilrs with frequency...You have to have stuff on your life other than your "oneitis" in order to cure yourself. Seriously, cure yourself. If you dont I assure you will end up without her anyway.

and Two, (this advice goes hand in hand with the first one) dont be available to her a like a pet any time. Be a man and have your individuality. You mention she broke up and got back with you over 12 times. WTF! HOW? CAN? YOU? LET? THAT? HAPPEN?????? You litterally went back to her and let her play and use you like a pet dog. Have some dignity man....So yeah, dont be available all the time. Sometimes even if you are available, make it look like you are not, and make a point that shes not everything in your life.

But seriously, read a book, or go to a bootcamp. You need it.

The solution can be gleaned from a book called the superior man. It sounds like the girl is in anguish about you and her ex and quite possibly the far away future. Be firm with her, dont be needy..... in the aforementioned book it talks about women needing a masculine direction, which your girl sorely needs right now, you also mentioned the times when you started talking to other women and she became interested! Its a sign my friend to be a MAN. She doesn't need you to drop off all your emotional baggage on her, she needs you to be a rock, be decisive and take action. What you nearly did buy being desperate, clingy and incessantly ringing is approach the friend zone.

My advice - Dont be a brat about it, dont nag her... Be calm, collected and give her space. DONT be someone she can offload all her ex baggage onto, if you let this happen your going to fuck it all up. Also dont allow yourself to spill all your shit onto her! Its what good friends do when they are upset! Not newby relationship people

I've been in a situation where a girl has been playing games and drawing up all my insecurities, its fucking awful and I identify with how you're feeling. You spend all the time in an emotional turmoil to the point where you're basically unwell, brought on by these HUGE upswings when things are ON followed by stomach churning downswings when you suspect something is up. It's unhealthy.

I would advise that you get away from this girl, I don't think you're ever going to have peace of mind and the only way you can get over this issue is by starting afresh with someone new who doesn't put you through the emotional mill.

Being in situations like this is like being addicted to a poison, you know its bad for you, but you can't stop going back for more. I spent a thoroughly miserable couple of months feeling like this over some fucking woman and you know what? She was simply not worth it.