I understand that people may have different ideas on this subject however I firmly believe that you should refrain from using the phrase for as long as you possible. Here is why. When you first attract a girl, most of the incredibly beautiful ones at least, you can not come off as a love drunk fool. You must come off as a challenge or else they will get bored of you. If you remain a challenge these girls will wonder why you aren't calling them beautiful every couple minutes or offering to buy them drinks or oblige to any command that they request. I believe that you should remain a challenge, even when you are dating. If you tell a girl the 3 word phrase of doom too early, what else does the girl have to strive for? You have already professed that you place this girl on a level so high that no others can compete. So she gets bored and leaves you. I waited 10 months tell my girlfriend I love her. I'm sure that some others wait longer. It got to a point where she was nearly begging me to say it. So I waited for the perfect day and time to say it. That way she can associate the first time I said those words with a romantic scenario for the rest of her life. Another benefit to holding off is the empowerment it gives to the phrase. Every time I tell my girlfriend I love her she knows for DAMN sure that I mean it because I waited until I knew nearly every aspect about her before I said it. That phrase was meant to be a strong phrase and it should be used as one. There are some instances of "love at first sight" in which I do not personally believe in but others do so take note that I exclude these circumstances. Please feel free to share your opinions.

Well, I'm in 6 month relationship, and I said those words in 3rd month. We had an argue and I was on my way to home, we were silent and grim. The moment my train arrived I kissed her forehead and said "I love you, I want you in my future" and entered train right away. She was shocked and since then I never seen someone who's been so amazing for me. She never argues, broke contact with all her exes (I didn't ask her to), and started talking about children and living together.

It was worth waiting...

There is no 'time to wait until' marker. I said it to my girl 3 month in the relationship and I strongly did love her. It doesn't even matter anyway , it's all about reading the signs. I knew she was in love with me because it was easy to see.

We were at an party and after I took her home and sat with her laid on the bed for a while. I looked in her eyes for a few seconds and said :"I need to tell you something."

When she heard that her pupils dilated (her eyes were basically full of pupil , it was like she was some sort of demon or something ) ) and her heart began pounding. Literally you could hear her heart it was so strongly beating. So yeah,I was pretty sure she wanted my to say it so she could say it back.

So I told her I loved her and she just gave me this huge ass hug and nearly choked me to death. She said she loved me too. It was a very emotional moment , one of those unique ones. At least for me it was.

So yeah,like I said , time is irrelevant. After 3 months with this girl I simply could not hold it in me anymore.I just had to tell her everytime I looked at her.

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Hey R.C. I appreciate that response. There's been studies that show that on average, men believe 3 months is the best time to say I love you. You and the previous comment shared that same range. I'm not in anyway saying that it was a mistake for you to do so because roughly 70% of men say "i love you" in that time frame. And of course some of them last. It was also shown that most women naturally think about saying I love you around 5 months.

Now, 3 months is still fine because it's normal. Which makes waiting longer special. Some could then argue that "wouldn't saying it really fast be special"? Yes, it would be but in the retarded kind of way.

So wouldn't we want to wait for the girl to be ready? Yes we would but every once in a while we see cases like yours where your girl starts becoming a love demon (angel?). But to state that timing is irrelevant is untrue.

I wasn't so specific in my post but it was geared to men who profess their love after 2 weeks. Do you mind if I ask how long you've been dating your current girlfriend?

Dude...people make connections. This can happen fast or slow or not happen at all.Obviously you can't make a real connection in two weeks but it depends on how much time you spend with that person and how you spend it.

With this girl the first 7 months of the relationship we did not fight even once.Not once.Not one arguement...We simply hit it off perfectly.Obviously problems started to show up eventually but 7 months is freaking impressive dude...it's rare to find someone with whom you can get along like that.And also we would see each other every day so it's not like we barely spoke.

What I mean by 'the time is irrelevant' is that you can't possibly put a time frame on it. Like I said,this connection can be fast (2-3 months) or slower. I mean , I really never though "I wonder if enough time has passed so I can say the 3 words. Oh wait,it's 3 months,should be fine."

We will have been dating for 3 years on the 24th this month.I can truly say she's the only girl I ever really liked.

It will probably die out unfortunately because she's 18 and I'm 20. I had a lot of experience with girls / relationships to know how perfect ours really is but she doesn't have this experience.She's only been with a couple of other guys before so she has no idea how priceless what she is living really is.

The only thing I regret is that I didn't meet this girl when I were 27 and she were 25. Maybe then we would have had a real future together.

Like I said,it's sad...but yeah,her lack of life experience will some day deliver the killing blow. Slowly ,but surely.The real sad thing is that I can't be the one to tell her she's making a mistake and I fear it will be too late when she'll figure it out on her own.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

That's really impressive that you are acknowleging that those problems are likely to come. And although people do sometimes connect faster than others, in my eyes you have proven my point.
Dude that means you were dating this girl when she was 15! No wonder she is going to be dying to say I love you. Shes been watching Titanic and Ryan Gosling flicks. You said it yourself. She didn't have a clue what love truly meant when you said it to her. She just associated it with romance and disney films.

You were mature and experienced which allowed you to dominate that relationship and handle it in a mature way. That is why you didn't argue in the first 7 months. If she were to start some immature argument you were there to remind her that it was pointless and gave a strong reason to defuse it. Now love is love don't get me wrong. The reason that you say her lack of experience is going to be the end of you guys is because she is getting more curious which will lead to a mistake she can't take back.

So far you have been a HUGE factor in her growing up. You've been there to cheer her up. You've been there to make her happy and you've been there for her for everything i'm sure because that's what a good boyfriend does. My point still stands because saying "i love you" to an unexperienced 15 year old is not the same and I get I did not specify this in my post either. I'm sure she can't imagine life without her lifeline(you).


You sound like a great guy and when and if this girl starts to do something that she will regret, i'm sure we will come to her senses.

She never did act immature.In some aspects she was more mature than me. That's the amazing thing about her. And yes,she was 15 , but she had shit parents and a shit childhood. At 15 she was basically living alone and taking care of herself , her house AND her dad when he was around. That kind of messed up stuff will force you to grow up no matter if you want it or not. You can't afford to be immature with a life like that.She looked and acted like an 18yo. That's what got me so into her. At some point she actually had to show me her ID because I simply couldn't believe that she was 15.

In any case , I don't think the lack of experience will cause her to make a mistake like cheat on me.I fear that the lack of experience will always feed into her curiosity make her wonder 'what else is out there' and thus make her feel..unfulfilled and unhappy.

And I can understand that.It's impossible to truly appreciate what you have if you have nothing to compare it to.

I understand and respect your opinion.And also you're right with pretty much everything you said. I'm just saying that every woman /relationship different and you can't pinpoint a right time to say it that applies to a general situation.Some are afraid of commitment , other have unpleasant past experiences and so on. But you are right,however,that you should delay it as long as possible and make it a challenge.

The more you work on something , the higher the value it will have.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Dude i've been reading some of your posts and some of the stuff you say is pure gold and the best part is that it's all sincere. I have a ton of respect for you and your insight.

Thanks.You've earned my respect as well. And not many people can do that ^^.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.