Hey guys,
at first i have to apologize for my english, if anything is not completely clear feel free to point it out and i will try to do some better
I am not sure if this is the right subforum, but i think it matches this best. If not - please move this topic.
So, thats the situation:
I've been together with my ex for 6 Year (I am now 24, she is 22), with a break of 3 month last year. Since we got back together after that break, things went really good and everything was fine. She had the wish to live together with me after some month, but i wasn't sure about it and said we should wait. Some month later, i think in July 2012 or something, i came back to that topic because i felt it is time now to move together. Anyways, that time she rejected ME an said she is not sure about it. I left it with that, because I was not to worried and, also felt comfortable whit what i had and my own little kingdom. Then, in August she went on vacation with her girls to Ibiza (they booked that while our break). After that, things began to struggle. I think I'm aware about the causes. She had fun, she began to think.
So, from August '12 to January '13 things where really turning bad. She had a lot of problems with her family, her grandpa which she really loves was diagnosed cancer and is about to die (she is a lot into that family thing), financial problems of her fam, lots of argues with and between her parents. Besides that, she came up with some sort of unhappiness about herself and her life (yeah, i think that has something to do with her age. I know some girls in the mid 20s who told me they had the same sort of problem in that age).
I tried to be there for her and support her with anything i could. I told her that, but said she can come to me with her problems anytime, but she has to tell me - i can't read minds. In fact, she never really did.
For me, things also went bad. In October 2012 I lost my job, for no reason. So from Oct '12 to Jan '13 i got full cash for doing whatever i want. But in that time I was almost not satisfied with my relationship at all. She was really cold and it was harder and harder to get find a connection to her. We were not talking much, if there was any sex it was bad (she always said she doesn't want sex at the moment because she couldn't let go of things, thinking to much and stuff). After I lost my Job I didn't really feel like she was there for me, because it was a hard time for me.
Someday in December '12 I asked her what her plans for new years eve are, and she told me that she already booked some sort of wellness-hotel with a friend of her (girl). That was like a kick in the face for me. Wow.
There were some fights about vanities, but things really began to stress me up. My friends and family noticed that she was rarely around and with me. On the first week of 2013 I noticed that she deleted all of our pictures from Facebook and hide her relationship status. That was enough for me, but I was thinking about a breakup for some days then. I called her and asked her what it was about, and she told me not to make a big deal out of it, she wants to keep things more privat. But as the thing with new years eve, it did hurt because she did not talk about it _before_ she acted. After that call I went to her place and broke up. I told her that i really tried, but i couldn't handle things any more and that this is not the way that i want to be treated.
At this point I really was clear with myself and started to deal with it. I deleted and blocked her number, deleted her facebook and started to have fun and play my game. From now on I had a K-close every weekend but nothing more. To be honest, it didn't really f-close anyway because I didn't feel like it.
Two weeks ago I was out with my friends an a carneval party. You have to know, I dont live in a town, so on that party was a highlight around here and you basically meet everyone you know
After I while i met her brother, and we smalltalked a bit. A bit later i noticed her. When a friend and me went outside for a cigarette i took the chance, layed my hand on her back from behind and said "Hey" (with a smile on my face, like saying "great to see you") while passing her (she was sitting on a bench). I am not sure if she noticed me before. Her face expression was like (Wow, wtf to to, i want to say something... - but i was gone as fast as i came). Yeah, i played my game, got in touch with a handfull of girls (2 k-closes, not sure if she noticed, was drunk as fuck). The next morning my sister told me that my ex was around my the whole evening, and then somehow disappeared around midnight.
Whatever, i found a msg on facebook from her she sent me about 1am which basically said "Sorry for leaving without saying a word, blablabla not sure if you even remember blablabla, have a good time, blabla bye."
I texted her back, and it went back end forth. We came to a sexual level pretty fast. I asked her to come over, because i was pretty horny. She said she had to clean up but we will meet another time. I left the conversation with something like "Lets to this, little cleaning-fairy" (i dont know if its the correct word, in germany i sounds much more sexy
)
From there on we texted pretty regularely including some heavy dirty talk, but i never left my frame. We talked about some sexytime highlights we had, she told my about her could feet which need to get warmed, that there is noone to cuddle anymore in the evening and so on. So, tomorrow afternoon we will meet. Our last text is from friday afternoon, and this is how it ended after we said that we will talk about what to do on sunday morning:
Me: I really have to leave now. Have a nice evening
Make sure you clean up on saturday this time, otherwise i have to help you on sunday
Her: Ok then
Have a nice evening to, dont get to wasted
We will see, maybe i wan't some help
So, my plans for tomorrow are: Coffee, after that chill out at a bar or something and have a drink. Based on the fact that I am driving and pick her up and bring her back to her place, logistics are clear. First and foremost I am looking to transform my entire negative feelings I had in the past month caused by her into a gigantic shitload of CUM and cover her with that. Lets see if i can do
What do you guys think? How should I escalate? Now that the point is nearly there, i am not completely sure about it anymore.
On the other hand, I love that girl.
During our break i had some other girls to, but I was not satisfied with them at all. Our values really match in most of the important points and stuff, so, to come to the point: I want her back. What should I do to get her back in the LTR-mood? Leave it all behind and dont talk about it? Only talk about the good things? Pointing out how I felt when I broke up and why?
Appreciate your help guys! Thank you all in advance.
CHAT