Psycho ex boyfriend



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 Post subject: Psycho ex boyfriend
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 4:53 am 
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I've never had the "pleassure" of dealing with one of this, but now I do, and it is slightly beginning to bother me.
She broke up with him about a month or two ago, and he was out of the picture, until she started being with me. He started calling her, texting her endlessly, she ignores his calls, sometimes answers and tells him she's really busy, and blah blah... He wants another chance, she had to delete him from facebook, I blocked him because he was also seeing my profile.
And today was probably the most stalker thing that he did, he went to her school, and searched for her car in all the parking lot, and wrote "I love you" on every single glass, then called her. This is when I told her that it was going beyond the line, and she says she knows but she just can't magically make him stop calling. It doesn't bother me a lot, but if he keeps like this, it will. I was thinking of answering her phone the next time he called and telling him, calmly that she doesn't want to talk with him.
I don't know, its starting to bother me. What should I do?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 7:56 am 
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I wouldn't deal with it. Do you really want that kind of baggage? Go find a new girl.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 8:12 am 
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I would do exactly what you said, tell him that he is bothering her, and intruding in your relationship. As a man you wish he respect your privacy and that he should seek professional help if needed.

I seriously would tread lightly, this guy has some commitment issues, and is psychologically disturbed. I wouldn't be so extreme as to get a restraining order if it continues and/or worsens.

A comedian once said you always hear stories about how some dude has some crazy ex and she is blatantly insane, but you don't hear ones about crazy ex boyfriends, cause those females find up in the miami river, and then he said some other funny lines.

Point is be careful.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 5:30 pm 
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I've dealt with this with 2 different girls! First time the guy dumped the girl, second time the girl had dumped the guy.

With both situations my girl ended up with the ex...even though the previous relationships had been abusive!!!

First time I played it cool and didn't react at all. She would continually say, "I wish he'd stop texting and calling ect"! Then suddenly she is back with him!

Second time I did the same as the first time except after two months of constantly hearing about him being a stalker and how she hated him I dumped her! Guess what happened the next day....! Yep she was in a relationship with her ex that she supposedly hated!


The lession I learned;

Don't get serious with a girl who has just broken up with her ex!

If an ex starts to contact my girl constantly without her going completely ape shit at him and changing her number, then I'll just say "I've been here before so I don't think we should see eachother while this shit is happening"

Because this usually happens in the first 6 months it's easier to walk away. Realistically it's HER problem and YOU didn't ask to inherit this drama!

Given my personal experience I'd next her if this started happening again!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Mar 17, 2012 12:33 pm 
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That's actually pretty crazy to hear that the ex boyfriend stalking her WORKED. Wouldn't the advice on this forum be to do the complete opposite if he were to ask us what to do to get his ex back?

I'm in the opposite situation really. My ex and I were on good talking terms up until recently when she started dating some new guy. Without warning, this guy who is about 6'6" and 250+ pounds rings the doorbell to my house and tells me that I need to stop talking to her or I'd be in for a beating.

I stopped, not out of fear of him, but out of pity for my ex girlfriend who didn't have the guts to tell me that she wanted no further contact, but instead sent her goony to do it. Of course, I made sure that the AMOG bf was put in his place and had a couple of my friends greet him with the same kindness as he gave me.

Needless to say, he now knows that I don't stand alone and he won't be knocking on my door again :)


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 Post subject: Re: Psycho ex boyfriend
PostPosted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 9:40 am 
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Quote:
I blocked him because he was also seeing my profile.
Now how on earth do you know that?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2012 9:08 pm 
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Quote:
That's actually pretty crazy to hear that the ex boyfriend stalking her WORKED. Wouldn't the advice on this forum be to do the complete opposite if he were to ask us what to do to get his ex back?
They had history together. Might not have been the stalking. He probably also got her jealous. Being persistent can seem alpha. Some women like abusive relationships AND this is why I don't worry about rejection so much. So what if you aren't the girls type. Sometimes that's a compliment.

Women who flock to those types of relationships enjoy the drama. They like the make up sex. They tend to cheat, lie and be responsible for half the drama. Maybe the guy isn't psycho and she drove him that way. Or... she is genuinely a victim. Things to look for are victim mentality (not good at all) or patterns of the same thing happening to her.

I live in a small town and I've had women say: "Every guy I dated was an abusive.. blah blah" but after a moments thought. Who are these guys? Her ex's are my friends and acquaintances, other women who dated them have no complaints.

Time will tell in that situation. If she truly is a victim of circumstance as opposed to a victim of her own skewed reality then she won't be going back to him and will want better for herself. I tell women this straight up and they can relate.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2012 9:55 pm 
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Dude.
This is called harrassment.

You can get the police involved.

They're good at that kind of thing, it's their job.
They won't make a scene but they'll make sure her ex doesn't do stuff like that.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2012 10:29 pm 
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Despite what she may be saying, you have to admit. There is a certain satisfaction when an ex is trying to get you back. Gives me more confidence cause I know I have options. A usually great test to see if she actually annoyed by his contacts or actually secretly liking them is the next time you hear her complain about the guy then just say "im sick of his shit. give me his number. I'm gonna text him and tell him "you dont wanna be with him so fuck off". You dont actually have to have intention to actually do this. Her response will make her choose a side. Is she with you all the way, or is she enjoying having a plan B?

If she's like, okay. Here is his number. Then just back away and say something like nah, i was just pissed for a second. I don't wanna intrude on your politics. Or if she goes in the opposite direction and gets concerned about you communicating with her ex then you know where things are at and it's time to exit the relationship.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2012 10:41 pm 
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Despite what she may be saying, you have to admit. There is a certain satisfaction when an ex is trying to get you back. Gives me more confidence cause I know I have options. A usually great test to see if she actually annoyed by his contacts or actually secretly liking them is the next time you hear her complain about the guy then just say "im sick of his shit. give me his number. I'm gonna text him and tell him "you dont wanna be with him so fuck off". You dont actually have to have intention to actually do this. Her response will make her choose a side. Is she with you all the way, or is she enjoying having a plan B?

If she's like, okay. Here is his number. Then just back away and say something like nah, i was just pissed for a second. I don't wanna intrude on your politics. Or if she goes in the opposite direction and gets concerned about you communicating with her ex then you know where things are at and it's time to exit the relationship.
That might be just what she is looking for. An opportunity to get him jealous and teach him a lesson and when he submits to her she goes back until he takes a dominant position again and the cycle begins again.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2012 11:17 pm 
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lol. We are painting a bad picture but it's all speculation.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2012 12:13 am 
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The guy isn't the problem here and you know it.

It's your girl. She's screening his calls and throwing up her hands and saying, "I don't know what to do!"

Helpless, right? Wrong.

If she cared about you more, she would answer this guy's call for the last time and say, "It's over."

She's probably really into you, but she's not SO into you that she's blocking this guy out. He's plan B and she's enjoying the fuck out of this.

Here's the thing: you can't tell her to do this. You can't teach manners to people. They either have them or they don't.

Start hanging out with one of your exes. It may seem silly, but hey, it didn't stop your girlfriend, did it?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2012 12:33 am 
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lol it might not be the girls fault. How little trust we have for the opposite sex. hahahah


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2012 1:10 am 
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Quote:
lol it might not be the girls fault. How little trust we have for the opposite sex. hahahah
Seriously? If the girl hasn't told him to stop, it's her fault. If she has, it's a police matter.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2012 5:54 am 
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Honestly guys, unless she has zero emotion about her ex, meaning no strong emotional feelings whatsoever good or bad, then she still has some "passion" for him. Until she can honestly look at him as "just another guy," stalking her or not, you're probably just a rebound in my opinion. The ball is in his court. If he is AFC, you keep your girl. If he is PUA and blows her off, now you're dealing with her emotions. She'll be wondering "why doesn't he react to my shit tests anymore? is he seeing a hotter girl? did he move on?"

Chicks want to break up with their guy and be "the one that got away." When a man, i.e. a pua, tells her to fuck off and ignores the fuck outta her after a breakup, she starts "wondering" things like "what's wrong with me?"

Anyways, keep your frame and simply don't give a fuck about the ex. Tell her shit like "you're mine now," and passionately throw her against a wall and give her a passionate kiss. Remember, you can't change a girl's mind, but you can change her emotions and that is all that matters in this game.


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