She had been distant for the past two weeks and I knew it was coming. Last night was pretty emotion filled, both of us crying etc. Her reason was that she just didn't know how to be in a relationship. It was her first one (25 years old - a whole load of casual sex) and she had given it her best shot. She said it was better to end now then continue and for it to be more painful down the line.

She said it wasn't fair to keep going out if she couldn't fully invest. She told me she needs to figure out why she struggles so much with relationships and being single is the only way to do that. She couldn't go through this growth whilst in a relationship. Also she only has 1 year left in the country on her visa and says she needs to throw everything she has at her career whilst she is here. Being single without commitments or responsibilities is the best way to do that. Selfish yes, but I understand and respect her decision.

Last night there was no anger, we were laughing and playing as normal. It was a very strange way to end it. I feel sad today but in a way it's like a weight has been lifted. It took us the best part of 5 months (although we were in different countries for 2 of those months) to call each other boyfriend and girlfriend. There was definite reluctance of both sides. I was considering going for an open relationship. There are also areas of my life that I want to pursue, which are only really possible as a single man (adventure sports e.g. mountaineering). I'm also don't want to live in this city and I mostly came back because of her. I am now free to work out where I want to settle.

We are amazing friends and the sexual 'chemistry' is crazy. It has by far been the best sex of both of our lives. We completely trust each other and taking that to the bedroom has lead to some incredible sexual adventures. There is a lot more I want to explore with her.

She told me she can't imagine me not being in her life and still wants to be friends and continue having sex. It's doesn't seem possible for us to be in a room together without having sex, so it's either friends who have sex or no longer friends. She said of course the decision was all mine. Whatever level I want or could be involved she would accept. She wants us to see each other but she just can't do the responsibility or commitment of a LTR at this stage in her life.

I'm really in two minds. Part of me wants to just cut contact. I put myself out there and she rejected me. I realise I have got to a stage in my life where I feel ready for a full on committed relationship. In terms of moving on and finding another girl keeping her around will hold me back.

However I am going away travelling in a few months so really there isn't any chance of starting something new in this time. So I'm looking forward to just having fun and vibing with girls, reconnecting with old friends and throwing myself into my business. Having her on call for sex is appealing and it can only improve my game (no neediness or desperation). I also can't imagine not seeing her again. She is too good a friend.

All thoughts and advice welcome and appreciated.

Relationships are too complicated and I think you shouldn't take the advice from someon who doesn't know you very well.

I work as a dating coach and when it comes to relationships, you need the BIG picture. About meeting girls? It's very important that you know what is that you want. Specially after ending up a relationship with someone, it can be hard. Make you are are over your girlfriend.

Check on the Link below and you can see videos about nightgame,daygame, aa, number closing... what you need to go out and meet girls.

But first check these 3 videos.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0HsXw4 ... 4OKeDCWlQb

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePikNH4 ... XbE65DvGJu

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuFcJfO ... FsOiSN173Y

Good luck.

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Winners have simply formed the habit of doing things losers do not like to do 18/03/12

I've been doing a lot of reading and thinking over the past couple of days.
Right, she doesn't want commitment or the emotional bond. She doesn't want me as a boyfriend. She can't see a future with me, or perhaps more accurately anyone at this stage in her life. So she just wants to keep me as a sex toy.
You know what? This kind of attitude makes me fucking angry with her.
I want her as my girlfriend. I want the commitment, the emotional bond, the shared life. I don't want to be friends. I'm going to cut all contact (apart from one logistic that needs to be sorted) for a month. I'm also going to get in touch with an ex which was left wide open as I went travelling. I hadn't contacted her since being back because I was in a new relationship. When I feel happy and like myself again I will start gaming.

However...

There is the fact that she is an unreal opportunity for sexual exploration.

She told me it was the best sex of her life. I honestly don't know how this happened as I had such little experience before her. I was constantly amazed at the response I could evoke in her sexually e.g. continuous orgasmic state 15-20 orgasms in a row (she told me it was like one 30 minute long orgasm) and couldn't walk (she fell over crossing the room) or talk afterwards.

She is a very sexual person with an exceptionally high sex drive (I was just about keeping up). She's bisexual, clit piercing, very kinky (bondage), and had brought up threesomes (she has had some before) and said she would be happy to try anal for the first time with me. In the bedroom it seems there is very little she wouldn't do for me. Not to mention the on demand blow jobs wherever and whenever and often when I didn't (I would usually wake up to find my cock in her mouth). A girl like this doesn't come around too often!

N.B. Just to be clear though she is not a complete slut (anymore). Before meeting me she had gone 6 months without sex because she was done with casual hookups and meaningless sex which left her feeling bad. When we broke up she said she wouldn't go back to that. In fact she said it was the worst of situations as she didn't want casual sex but didn't know how to be in a relationship. Poor girl!

So what to do?

For my own pride I should tell her "It's girlfriend or nothing". But for sexual experience (and what is life if not a series of experiences) and development she would be the ultimate fuck buddy (how our relationship started). If she wasn't this wild in the bedroom I wouldn't think twice about cutting her out of my life. I'm sure if I was older I wouldn't keep her just for sex. But I'm still young.

When you get old, you don't regret the things you did, you regret the things you didn't do. So just ask yourself, what would you regret in the future? There is your answer. I don't know if you watched the videos but at the end, what is impossible?

Good luck.

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Winners have simply formed the habit of doing things losers do not like to do 18/03/12