you can say that again!

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Yeah, I can tell things won't work out with them, but it is best to just move on so I don't even consider getting back into something like that with her when she comes crawling back. I heard from a friend of a friend that he respects me as her ex and isn't trying anything but I dont know if I believe that. Although it's a pretty elaborate lie when it doesn't really matter what I think about it anyway. He could be trying to save face, or hide it, but that could be making it into something bigger than it really is.

This is probably best for my game anyway. I saw them dancing tonight, and I found a blonde HB9 to dance with, needless to say my friends were impressed. Anyway, thanks man

Thanks Mack! You seem more mature and wise then me I like to avoid ackward conversations thats why I lied and it bit me in the ass!! I will take your advise and have a serious heart-to-heart about the issue and hopefully it will close the topic for good.

Respect,

sorry if I kept it very un detailed, but the girl is a very conservative christian, never had a bf. And I'm not ready for a relationship until I fix my inner game, as you can see my insecurities are showing.

I understand the ratio, but can you delve further into how a man can act like a bad boy? Sort of like what should he should incorporate, or exhibit in order to be a bad boy?

Whilst I'm here, I might aswell;

OK, so I've been in a strong exclusive relationship with this great girl, and our feelings for each other are mutual. We both earn very little, and whilst I live with my rich parents, she lives alone in a single room, and just about makes ends meet. Nevertheless, she has never let it come in the way of our relationship, and despite her money troubles, she pays for her share every single time without fail, and insists upon it. Anyway, it is Christmas soon, and she's returning to Madrid for a week, and she's recently been asking me to buy her some shoes(Uggs). She's gone about it in a typical girly, cute and childish way. I've always laughed it off with 'So you want hugs, eh?', which makes her laugh, but she's said it enough to make me think that she really does want me to get it for her. So my question is, should I?

it's simple.

be selfish.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Hey thanks lodge. I freeze her out all this week, my paranoia disapear, it will certainly come back when i will see her again but in a weaker form. For now i feel myself again, can do my stuff, can think clearly about the relationship, no jealousy, no anger, paranoia idea are here but they can be put away easily. And from her reaction from the freeze out , i can say that i really misinterpret the loose of attraction (but it has been too powerful on her, for now she is feeling guilty of things she didn't do, i will have to reverse this for her, i don't want to fuck her mind), it wasn't so bad that what i was thinking.

I'm also trying to contact a psy

Honestly, I'm a little confused about it all still, even when I'm pretty sure my only option is to move on. She brought up being friends with benefits, then no less than a week later, said we couldn't do anything because she was interested in the other guy (PUA, friend of a friend). I guess she might just have reservations about seeing more than one person, but I thought it was pretty clear that we weren't going to be in a relationship. Maybe she thinks she can convert him into a one-girl person, but that remains to be seen.

Mack, I have a little situation in my love life. I am in highschool, and i have a girlfriend who is one year younger than me in highschool. She lost her virginity to her ex boyfriend at 14 and it was overwhelming with her and she connotated a bad rap with sex. So, FINALLY i have sex with her last month, and it really really took her a lot to do this with me. Like, she cried right before we did it. I am going away to college next year, and i know that we are not going to be together because i want to move on with my life, and am going miles away from home (MIZZOU). I realize that my girlfriend is actually kind of a mean girl, to others. She doesn't have a lot of time to hang out (cheerleader). I feel like im not pulling my weight in the relationship, like i could care less if we hang out tonight, instead of months ago where i really really wanted to spend lots of time with her. I asked her for her heart, took it, and now i dont even want it??? what the fuck is wrong with me. I feel like a total douche because i did this with her and its a huge deal to her and im going away soon and i feel like i would almost like to be out of this relationship because im leaving soon and she doesn't even seem like the girl of my dreams anymore. I dont want to hurt her, I feel terrible about having sex with her when my emotions arent as powerful now. What should i dO?

Hey MACK I've been mostly a lurker on these boards since I've gotten into a relationship to help me see some warning signs before they happen. Well my relationship is perfectly fine so far I've been together with my girl for 4 months now and about 3 months before that unofficial.

I never got laid till about 2 years ago I'm 23 now. So I was into PUA for awhile which I got quite good at. had a few ONS and a couple flings nothing serious. So I decided to try out the relationship thing for awhile since my only other relationship was in high school and lasted a month. This girl I work with wanted to break up with her bf because he was verbally abusing her a lot. I don't know the details but that's when I swooped in.

My question to you is how do I work on my inner game. Everyone is always saying work on your inner game well how do I go about doing this. I feel like my PUA skills are a 7 or an 8 out of 10 and my inner game is like 3-4 out of 10. I always assume the worst possible things will happen for some reason they always pop in my head first. This has always happened though even before I was in a relationship. For example say my girl is going out to a little get together with her gf the first thought that hits me is fuck what if she meets some random dude and cheats on me etc. I felt a little jealous at first when she would talk to other guys but I'm pretty much over that. I take it as a compliment my girl is hot of course other people will hit on her. Another example of my stupid thinking one time I fucked her with out a condom for a few strokes and I got super paranoid thinking she would be pregnant lol. Another time when I was going on a plane to California first thought that popped up in my head when i sat down was shit what if the plane crashes.

Unfortunately she is leaving for college in the summer to go to Ohio so our relationship is going to come to an end. I just found out last week that she's going which sucks since I like her a lot but it's Probably for the best since I just wanted to try out this relationship thing for awhile and I don't plan on getting married anytime soon. I told her that we should stay together till she has to leave and she agreed.

I have a problem which is pretty embarrassing but I believe I have delayed ejaculation I've never came from sex, blow jobs or hand jobs. I've told her about my problem she agreed to try and help me. I told her that it still feels amazing even though I don't cum and she really likes that it makes me feel good so she still gives me blow jobs. Today she gave me the best blowjob so far for an hour straight but I still didn't cum. I've cut off watching porn and masturbating because I believe that may be the culprit here. She's not on birth control yet but plans to be, sex with a condom does not feel good at all my dick just goes numb after a couple minutes.

Also I feel really guilty talking to other girls when I'm in a relationship like flirting with them whether it be in person or facebook, txt, social gathering. Anyway I was bored and wanted to make this post because I don't want to lurk these forums anymore because I don't think it's helping me it's just making me more paranoid since almost everything is mostly negative posted on here.

tell her the truth.

i wish i could give you some complex and fulfilling answer.

but i can't.

the truth of the matter is...

you are both young,

you've got your lives ahead of you,

you aren't meant for each other,

and you are moving away.

but i caution you, you better be damn sure that this girl isn't "The One" for you,

before you break her heart.

cuz there ain't no turning back once you fire that shot.

trust me.

if you truly feel nothing for her anymore, then you need to move on.

also, she did agree to have sex with you.

it's not like having sex with someone obligates you to love them forever and ever until the end of time regardless of any extenuating circumstance.

sometimes, shit just doesn't work out.

it's better that she learns that now at a relatively young age,

than later on...

just be dead honest with her.

that's what i would do.

i welcome suggestions from anybody else.

however, it is also important that you are firm, quick, decisive, and get it done.

no discussions, no debates, no arguments, no bullshit...

because she will try and if you buy into it, things will go badly very quickly.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

hey, nice to meet you.

and, lol, your post was very "stream of consciousness".

you certainly touched on some random and unrelated subjects.

but i'll attempt to address them individually.

first, there is no magic technique for "inner game". inner game is another word for true peace and confidence within yourself. period. that is it. whatever path you need to take in life, whatever road you must travel, whatever trials you must weather, if those things bring peace and confidence into your being on a subconscious/unconscious/deep level, then you are improving your "inner game".

second, "swooping in" for a known rebound isn't the best tactic, but hey, if it worked out well then no harm done.

third, so you guys (or her? or you? both of you? talked about it? unspoken?) have decided that your relationships is "going to end" when she goes away? that sounds very mature, and quite uncommon. i'm curious how that conversation went.

fourth, lmao! there is nothing wrong with thinking planes are going to crash. i think that every time i get on one. the entire time. in fact, i have to get inebriated to even get on a plane. i don't just mean socially lubricated either. i mean...wasted. i'm like Mr. T from the old A-Team series. (old reference)

fifth, not being able to orgasm with your woman is a problem. it's a real problem. and it is psychological. it can be desensitization from porn and masturbation. the thing about porn is it rewires your brain to be addicted (and seek) out crazy kinky shit. not that there is anything wrong with some crazy kinky shit. but the problem is that it robs your ability to enjoy the simple (yet amazing) act of fucking your woman. if you need to watch porn. try to watch shit that isn't all crazy. try to watch vids that are actually of straight intercourse, so you can retrain your brain to be turned on by "real sex". it's truly disturbing what porn has done to many a brain. lol, just read the "asshole licking diaries" by richard pryor in this forum! (sorry, richard, couldn't resist)

sixth, it is a fair concern that your gf might get pregnant even if you just give her a few strokes. i have a beautiful daughter from "a few strokes". lol

seventh, there is a difference between playful/social flirting and flirting (with intent) and any reasonable adult knows the difference. as long as you can stay within those bounds, you have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about.

eighth, i think that your perception that everything written on this forum is negative...is wrong, quite honestly. there is a lot of both good and bad written here. and a lot of realism. everybody needs a break once in awhile. if it's not your cup of tea, then move on. i can say, i had a similar experience. this forum opened my eyes and now i understand a lot more about the world around me (concerning females, that is). a lot of it is upsetting to me (still) due to old afc tendencies. but i'm working on that. personally, i don't want to be a "pua". i just want to be competent with women when i choose to engage with them. this place and other reading material as well as real life field experience in just being outwardly social and confident with women, i have seen a huge improvement in the number of offers that i get. i turn most down because my head isn't in the right place right now.

it's just good to know that i could fuck them, although most of the time, i pass. i know lode knows where i am coming from on this, if he reads this too.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Haha yea I know the post was really random. Yea it probably wasn't the greatest idea to be the rebound but I got to know her well at work since there is a lot of down time. I felt like she was ready to move on mentally. I waited till she asked me to be exclusive.

Well she can't afford college and have her own place here, she has no money. Her dad is offering to pay for her college in Ohio. Her parents are divorced and she does not get along with her mother so she does not want to live at home much longer. I told her that I don't want her to stay here because of me but we should still see each other till she has to leave. Then we both cried. I haven't told her that I'm going to break up with her when she leaves. I don't want to do a LDR. She's still fairly young 18.

Yea I've decided to cut all porn and masturbation out cold turkey I need to re program my brain.

Yea you're right about the forums it has really helped me understand females. I'm a reformed AFC like you. So I also have some AFC tendencies. I just have a hard time trusting women and hate how I always assume the worse is an annoying thinking habit.

Cheers, so being selfish would often risk the wrath of your GF, so would it be fair to say that a bumpy relationship is better than a smooth one?

Been going out with this woman for 3 months. She works crazy hours and is a professional athlete, meaning she’s always tired. Also, she lives with her parents despite being 33 years old. She has a curfew.

I almost never see her during the week, except at the gym maybe or we walk our dogs. On the weekends we have sex, which is awesome, but she never spends the night because of her parents.

She’s not an affectionate person. We never hold hands, she never kisses me except when we’re about to have sex.

She is the one that initiates contact 90% of the time, though. She sends txts first during the day, etc. At least a 3:2 ratio... more like 3:1.5

This week I wanted to test her. I didn’t answer her call on Thursday night because I knew we weren’t gonna go out and I wanted her to maybe think I was out. Friday night I didn’t ask her out (she worked Saturday 7am). She did send a txt.

Yesterday she made it pretty clear she wanted to see me, so I told her to come over.

I made it a mission that she was the one who had to initiate sex. An hour passed and she made no effort to kiss me. I stood my ground.

A while later this male friend from work called. She asks me if I want to meet him. He was playing pool at some place. She mentions that he has a dog named Roxy, and I asked if he was gay. She says, “I don’t know. Maybe, now that you mention it.”

He keeps txting her, and she’s like “so you want to go? You don’t have to if you don’t want to” and I thought well the guy is gay, so what the hell.

Big mistake.

We got there and there was this guy, a loser really, but with decent looks. Not gay at all. He was negging my woman, teasing her, being playful. Didn’t pay much attention to me. I’m thinking, “why did I agree to this. Never again.”

There weren't any women at the bar, so I couldn't hit on anyone. I stood there like a jerk while the guy threw popcorn at my woman.

After 2 drinks she tells me lets go, so we left.

I was pretty quiet during the ride back. She asked me if I was ok, I said yes. When we were getting near my house I unfastened my seatbelt. She didn’t make any effort to go in “is it ok if I drop you here?” “yeah, here’s perfect.” I got out of the car and said bye without giving her a kiss or anything, not even eye contact.

She calls me 5 minutes later and asks me what’s wrong with me and asks me if I want to tell her something? I said as a matter of fact I did, and she said go ahead. I told her I’d rather tell it to her face, and she said she was downstairs and that she was coming up.

When she got up she asks if I was gonna break up with her, and I told her yes. She asks if it was because she lived with her parents, and I said “listen, your work hours are crazy, you get in every day at either 5am or 7am, and on the days that you don’t get in early, you have a 1am curfew. Honestly, I don’t think you're ready for a relationship.”

She was looking at me very serious. But she said “ok” and left. That’s the way she rolls.

Truth is I didn’t tell her a lot of other reasons why I think this relationship isn’t working for me. She’s not affectionate, I feel like I constantly need to be playing games with her even though we’ve been going out for 3 months (constant shit tests, she likes to be Alpha), sex only once a week, she's always tired, because of her diet we can't go out to dinner, etc, etc.

I’m pretty down right now. Last night I thought about writing her an email telling her the real reasons why I was breaking up with her because the fact is, she can’t change her work hours or curfew (reasons I gave her for breaking up) but she could change the other stuff that bothers me (being affectionate, more sex, etc). But this morning I came to my senses and figured that wasn’t such a good idea.

Also, I’m wondering how I should proceed here. Obviously with the holidays coming, it would be nice to have a girl I can spend time with. What if she calls me and tells me she wants to talk? Should I tell her about her not being affectionate, etc?