I agree, and that is my concern here. It isn't "inner game" or "something deeper", it is that I am a catch and need to be rvaluating if she has the character that I would like to continue investing in. So how close are we to where you guys would say no longer worth it? Also, let's say this is a one off situation with her, how do i go about talking to her about it wothout coming across as controlling but still firm.

I keep getting the "talk to her" response.... well duh haha. That is what I am asking for help with!

The reason I think there's something deeper is because there are some weird conversations here than don't come out of the blue. For e.g....you said she claims she hasn't hooked up with her friends. Now, that would only come up if you asked or if she felt like you would need to hear whether or not she fucked a friend. Same way she asks you if you trust her. Well that's weird because the issue is not about trust and if she's going there either there is a history with you 2 on trust, or shes not being honest. There's an issue with trust here and I can only assume it's come up at least once in the relationship. If it hasn't come up, what's the point of her asking this question and on a similar note the conversation on whether sh fucked a friend must have come up weirdly.

Also you're not confident in your relationship. If you were you'd say these things directly to her. So what is it? I know that didn't answer your question be back later

From this I'm seeing a gf who takes back an invite and a bf who is afraid to call out bs. I have to assume that things haven't gone smoothly at some point

The reason I think there's something deeper is because there are some weird conversations here than don't come out of the blue. For e.g....you said she claims she hasn't hooked up with her friends. Now, that would only come up if you asked or if she felt like you would need to hear whether or not she fucked a friend. Same way she asks you if you trust her. Well that's weird because the issue is not about trust and if she's going there either there is a history with you 2 on trust, or shes not being honest. There's an issue with trust here and I can only assume it's come up at least once in the relationship. If it hasn't come up, what's the point of her asking this question and on a similar note the conversation on whether sh fucked a friend must have come up weirdly.

Also you're not confident in your relationship. If you were you'd say these things directly to her. So what is it? I know that didn't answer your question be back later[/quote]


It is a new relationship so the topic of trust has come up direct. I did show a bit of hesitation over the character of her friend and her endorsing the behavior which may have raised the question of trust on her end. I don't think trust is black and white, I trust her to be a faithful gf to me but may not trust her to make the right moral decision in a scrnario not involving me, (such as her friend not bringing her bf who I have grown closer with over the last two months so she can see her ex I speculate) in that sense maybe I don't trust her. I also discussed all this with her yesterday which is how I have the new dialogue that was provided. I know I have been spotty in providing details and facts so that is on me. I appreciate you staying engaged on this Neo

There's nothing to be firm or controlling over. Simply tell her you have no problem with her going to the party or the weirdness of the situation, but you take concern in the fact that she lets her friend run her relationship. A friend getting mad that you're bringing your bf to what's not a GNO is childish. And her complying on that demand is even more so.

Ask her if she'd feel justified if the situation was reverse and you'd cancel her invite because one of your bros got mad. Is that sensical to any degree?

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I did and she claimed she would be understanding

Also I need to be careful with the whole friend thing in a new relationship. Girls are sensitive about their best friends I feel

No, you don't.

If you make her chose between you and her friends, she shouldn't date you.
If her friends make her chose between them and you, they shouldn't be her friends.

To me her friend seems like a brat and as mentioned before she complied with her demand for no justifiable reason.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Then she's either dishonest or stupid.

Look, this has nothing to even do with the fact that you're dating. If I had two friends and one of them retracted my invitation to an event because the other one said don't bring him, and he complied, how the fuck am I going to keep being his friend, let alone be understanding of his choice?
That is simply conflicting with basic common sense and just screams dysfunctional.
Bring anyone else in, and it's prone to failure regardless if it's 2 months or 2 years.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Huh? So your gf friend wants to hookup with her ex so you're not invited because you're cool with the bf?

Listen to rc....but damn. I'd just assume my gf was the one going to see her ex