On/off relationship. Is it worth it? my first post



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PostPosted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 6:43 am 
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Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2015 2:56 am
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I get the feeling that you are in denial about wanting to be friends and you actually want more. For a girl who is now 'just a friend' you are posting about her an awful lot.
No, I'm not in denial.

I continued to ignore her, took her "out of the ecuation", that is, of course with the exception of a few days ago when SHE contacted me and SHE wanted to talk. As I said, I was cool.

As I said, it is hard to do this, after starting to have feelings for her, but I am forcing myself to do it.

Otherwise, when I see her around, in parties, campus, etc. I'm just saying hello and I mind my own business.
Quote:
If the idea of seeing her with another guy would really upset you, I recommend you break off contact with her completely and end your friendship.
I don't mind her seeing other people. I don't own her. She does what she wants.

And as I said, we're only formally "friends", if she doesn't have anything relevant to tell me or she likes playing games I'll just continue to mind my own business like she doesn't exist.
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Or escalate towards sex and see what happens.
As I said in the former posts, I could do that, I could be together with her, but if I want a serious relationship that will be a very bad idea.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 24, 2015 2:59 pm 
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Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 8:24 pm
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Location: Nottingham, UK
You need to move on then. Talk to other women. This girl is still weighing heavily on your mind. You shouldn't be thinking about a friend this much.

You will be surprised how quickly you forget about this girl when you've got a hotter girl sucking your dick.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 10:49 pm 
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Well I did move on, there was no other way.

I kinda forced myself into picking up other girls (force myself since as a westerner is so easy to pick up Chinese girls) and I got layed a couple of times. I'm focusing now on getting some western pussy, especially from the entourage of my ex.

Although it is easier when you're with another girl, I don't agree that it's easy to forget.

Some interesting things happened lately with this girl.

Lately she has given me many signs that she'd want to get closer.

Like deliberately being in the same place with me, taking the bus at the same time, this kind of stuff. I was always cool, being warm and nice, but never trying to get nearer.

We even talked a couple of times (more like she talked). She seemed very very nervous every time I saw her around.

And last night was kinda weird.

We had some drinks with a big group of common friends and colleagues from the Uni, I didn't talk with her except for the usual politeness. As before, she was giving me signs that she'd want more.

So at some point some people wanted to go to a salsa bar, since I love salsa, I thought I must go. At some point she asked me from the other end of the table if I'm going, I answered "OF COURSE I'M GOING", and probably that's why she also decided to go (she was totally underdressed for salsa)

So we had some more drinks there, I danced with a bunch of super hot girls, had an excellent mood and continued to ignore her. At some point she asked me if I wanna dance with her. I said yes, and we danced. Really really REALLY dirty.

Since we both live in the same dorm, she asked me if we could share a taxi back, I said yes.

In the taxi she started talking a lot of things (bullshit, mostly complaining about things, crying, etc.) and at some point she asked me what do I think, cause "I never tell her what I think", so I took her hand, look at her in the eyes and told her that she knows very good what I think, I didn't change, I never change, I'm like a rock, I told her.

She was VERY drunk.

Anyways, we arrived, she was talking continuously, crying, I tried to be physically near to her (especially in the taxi, when she was crying) but I felt it's not good. So we went to our rooms with a cold "good night".

I'll continue minding my own life, and keep the distance.

Also, I'd like to post some thoughts about this in another, more appropriate place on the forum, since I don't have a relationship with her anymore.

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