sounds fine to me, but convoluted.

i would just prefer to date multiple people and call it what it is.

if i felt special enough about someone to live with her, have children with her, marry her... i would choose monogamy.

now, i'll butt out.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

According to psychologists, open relationships really only work from the guys end. Women are just wired differently and no matter how progressive they are it's hard to overcome biology. The women end up severely unhappy with the entire thing in the end and most likely will become bitter and possibly hate your guts. It's a nice fantasy to think you can have your cake and eat it too but not if there are any real feelings there. If you care about her you're better off breaking up. I mean there MAY be a chance but it's like miniscule.

How could a woman value you to a high degree and still hookup with other guys? I don't think it is possible.

I don't see any way this situation can end with a successful relationship. Enjoy the ride I suppose.

I think problems tend to occur when a relationships status changes to open. If it started out as open then you both got on board and were happy with the terms. If it was monogamous and then became open you got to ask yourself why the change? What was wrong? It also seems to happen that one of the couple is not as happy with open as the other?

To my mind a change from monogamous to an open relationship happens when the couple is unhappy but want to stay together for the emotional security and easy/good sex until they find someone better.

Going in the other direction open -> monogamous is a big statement. It's saying I have been pursuing lots of options but actually what I really want is just you. That's ultimately what I want in life but am not ready for at my current stage in life.

The ultimate goal of monogamous relationships is to stay together for a life-time. Under this definition almost all relationships fail. Under polyamory relationships come and go. People naturally flow in and out of your life. As such a relationship which say lasted 3 months could be cherished as a success. Isn't that a more pragmatic and optimistic outlook?

um no, lol,

why would you want to continuously lose people you have fallen in love with?

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

You don't but that's the nature of relationships, hence the pragmatism of the open approach. Love and a successful relationship are two different things. In an ideal world you would meet the girl you love and be with her in a happy committed monogamous relationship. However we all know that's not how it works. I am not saying that polyamory is a perpetual state of saying good bye. I am saying it recognises that relationships have a timespan and it therefore celebrates the time spent together for what they are. In a monogamous relationship finding someone else marks the relationship a failure which is not necessarily the case.

I also think it is naive to think that you will love ever person you have an intimate relationship with.

As a side point I think letting someone go is one of the ultimate signs of love. It's saying I love you so much as a person that I just want you to be happy. If this relationship / circumstance can't provide it then letting you go is the best option. True love doesn't possess or own.