I have been in an open relationship for about 5 or more months now. The girl was never really into the whole relationship idea but i had always dopped hints that i wanted one with her.

Now today, she sent me a text saying that she wants to be my gf. I'm a little taken back by this and have come to you guys for advice.

If i say yes, and we start dating. What changes from being in an open relationship to a closed one? Is there anything i have to do to keep it healthy, etc?



(I have never been in a closed relationship before)

This is kind of confusing. The whole idea of an open relationship is that she IS your girlfriend already but you both have the option of seeing other people on the side. If that wasn't the case, you guys were dating but weren't committed to a monogamous relationship. You can actually talk to her about what she expects out of this "closed" relationship.

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Huh, that's interesting. I never really thought about us already being together.

Jack, would you say the biggest difference is just seeing other people?

I'm not saying that you guys were together. I forget that dating is defined differently in different regions. I'm saying that this doesn't sound like an open relationship. But yes, the difference is an open relationship is you and your girlfriend being allowed to see other people but at the end of the day the two of you would be the top priority.

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A closed relationship is an open relationship were you don't date/fuck/kiss/get intimate with other people expect the person you're in a relationship with.

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What changes is that you both stop sleeping with other people.

Basically, what she's saying is that she's already in a relationship with you in her mind. She no longer has any interest in anyone else but you. So now she wants you to join her in that feeling through displaying it through action. It's similar to when a girl says " Do you miss me? ". She wants you to miss her because she misses you and doesn't want to feel that alone. Unfortunately life doesn't work that way; although as guys we enable them to think it does.

This is one of the reasons I don't believe in "open relationships". If the guy stays unemotional, detached, and sees and sleeps with the girl consistently she will always come with this relationships preposition. I wrote an article called " Should Men Be Allowed A Cheat Day In Relationships?" on my site that will go into this in further depth.

Now the question is.. Do you want to be in a relationship with her? If so why?

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