Everything was perfect(not really, every relationship is in danger), but out of the blue(not really, I/we surely done something wrong)... "Something is missing".

It kinda came from nowhere and I don't understand. I'm wondering "what is missing" and shocklingy, it seems like it's one of the most common scenarios when couples break up.

I see absolutly no reason for breakup and it's so confusing.

I asked her what is was, she can't really give me the answer(she can't put finger on it and this also very typical). I know she is psycially attracted to me(but suddenly withdraws from sex), she thinks i'm fantastic(but suddenly don't want to commit, rather want to be friends)and she had great time together with me(but don't want to give it a chance). I don't believe some other dude is involved. It's like im the "90% perfect guy".

I really think that everything is great for us(in every possible way), but something is missing for her. She also told me, that her feelings for me is not the way it supposed to be(like falling out of love), but she can't tell me why(because I have done nothing wrong she told me so). She also told me, that this feeling has been underway for a period, but she came to realization.

We just made it last 12months. When I write this, I kinda now see, that it's over for good.

How can people make it last 20+ years, while some couples barely makes it last 12 months, before moving on. I think it's a very good question.

I just want hear your stories and conclussions(I really don't have any serious relationship experience). I want to be smarter next time.

Thank you.

Why the lies and hiding shit here?

You were 30 and she was 46

she dumped you a couple months ago

You wanted kids and she didnt/couldnt

You would sneak and read her text messages and she found out


How to do better next time?

Dont date old women seriously
If you want kids find a woman who can produce them and wants them
When a chick dumps you...walk away
Stop reading people's messages and being insecure

Everything was great but something was missing for her? Come on thats bs. Why lie to us and yourself like that. You dont value yourself man. If you did youd never have wifed this woman up knowing what you want. You wouldve taken the advice given months ago. How to make a relationship last 20 years? Date for what you want, not what you can take. Dont check people's phones cause you're afraid. And be willing to walk away.

We went together again? I played it good, but it only did last for 4 weeks or so, before she went like this.

I think it might be because I checked her and it gave huge impression.

Nothing to hide, just want some experienced advice really...

Advice on what?

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

Jeez...you missed the whole point of the previous advice. You wanted kids. She couldnt and didnt. Where do you think the relationship would end up? You were insecure and checked her phone numerous times. Where did you think it was heading?
You know where it ended? When YOU weren't the one thinking something was missing. When YOU, the younger guy who wants kids, werent the one on his way out. When YOU, the younger one, was the insecure one. Do you really think a woman would respect a man like that? Would be attracted to a man like that? Who wants something to last that would have continued with him not getting the kids he wants? You really wanted to continue with this woman, die without being a father, and having to check her phone for the next 30+ years? Call yourself lucky that she put your happiness first before you did.

To answer your question again, some couples cant last 12 months while some can last 20 years because those failed couples do what you did. They choose out of desperation. One or both partners throws aside what they want, to just have someone there. And that desperation and neediness turns off the other person and they end it.

Alright, something to do think about buddy. Thanks alot.

It feels horrible, that I see all the mistakes I made(regardless out the outcome), but I got no other shots left to make it good again. I even screwed up my 2nd chance.

I don't know how to get over this. Perhabs this should be my main question.

What I believe is the main cause why girls stop loving your "out of nowhere"... Is that you probably put this fake persona and she got in love with it, you were maybe cocky, funny and interesting guy to hang out with, she felt no pressure, conversations were light and she finally found someone who is comfortable in his own skin. then, all of the sudden you became weird.

Eventually, the real YOU emerges. Your recent behavior is not something she got used to, and she probably feels cheated and senses you are fake. Consistency is missing. THE GUY she fell for... Is missing.

This is why just learning PUA stuff can actually hurt guys (who are new at this) more than help if not calibrated properly. And that's why it will always be harder to keep a girl, than get one.

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Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

A. It's never out of the blue. You chose to ignore what she thought were clear messages.

B. Obsess. You already are. You’re going to do this no matter what the fuck anyone says here, obviously you don’t understand, her reasons for breaking up seem lame to you, you’re undoubtedly struggling to wrap your head around it, why, why, why? Eproctophilia, that's all you miss.

C. Read J.Daniels shit about getting your ex back.

d. Go out and reconnect with your buddies, family, and go do all the shit you would never do while she was up your ass 24/7. Especially if has tits or a gasoline fired engine.

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.