Had a pregnancy scare the other day with the HB9 the night after we had the girlfriend discussion. It was all down to changing condoms. I told her straight after the sex something wasn't right I perhaps should have washed my hands between changing them, but upon talking about it two days later she had a go at me for not mentioning anything sooner as I suggested perhaps I noticed whilst changing condoms my hand was wet. I then tried to tell her this obviously wasn't the case as I would have said something straight away. She didn't accept this last bit though and assumed I realised my hands were wet, all I remembered was after the sex me feeling something wasn't right. She was really annoyed with me last night and her Mum and sister (she lives at home) thought I was a twat.

However after phoning her later she had calmed down and suggested we slow down and do some more normal dates, although she still feels like my girlfriend. I then did the beta thing of saying I feel pretty scared of losing her, but she told me I needn't be. I was a bit soppy last night, however she said it was in a good way and that she just probably wasn't in the best state to receive it. She did tell me after I said I really liked her that she liked me too.

She texted me today about going to the doctor and discussing different methods of post-sex contraception etc like the coil. Then told me someone at work was in hospital so she couldn't see me tomorrow. I replied with a short text telling her I'll properly text her later then tried to phone when I was home but she didn't answer then said she was watching her favourite tv programme. She then made more normal conversation, and we teased each other then I said goodnight and she quickly replied.

She had a go at me last week for not texting her enough while I was on holiday so she assumed I was just in it for sex. I went to her party at the weekend though and she was extremely appreciative as she texted me afterwards thanking me a lot.

How do I recover from such a stressful turn of events and turn this relationship around?

I honestly don't see much you've done wrong. Don't rush into the relationship, and don't be the one bringing up the relationship. Let her talk about being in a relationship with you. Try not to be soppy or tell her you really like her a lot, be a bit less gushy about your feelings with her at this early stage. Never tell her you're scared of losing her, to a woman's brain it's the equivalent of her telling you she's not scared of losing you.


I think you're ok though. Just keep cool and try to control your emotions. Keep things light and fun. Be a bit aloof.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

Most guys have been there at one point or another... The pregnancy scare. I've had several of them myself - none have led to a breakup.

It's important that you don't try to navigate your relationship when you're both stressed out with a pregnancy scare. Nobody is thinking straight. You want to just keep things light and be present and in the relationship while something like that is happening.

Sounds like you sorta grew a vagina when you told her you were scared of losing her... and that whole speech you gave. I would learn from that and avoid doing something like that again.

It's fine to tell her how you feel if she's your girlfriend - it's not fine to just hand over your testicles and tell her that you're scared she won't give them back. Honestly I don't know that it sounds like this girl is even your girlfriend, but you'd know better than me.

Appreciate you guys telling me pregnancy scares aren't just limited to me. She texted me today asking if I'm free to meet her tomorrow. Being a depressive pessimist I'm assuming she's going to break up with me, but according to my close friends reading the texts they think she's still pretty into me.