To be fair I have had a fling or two in the past, I'm no choirboy. However, the inner game, confidence and just knowing I could get a stranger to a point where I could have sex with her is the thrill I would want. It's a confidence thing - I can't think of anything much more demanding on confidence than trying to game a HB10 from cold, especially with a wedding band on! If I could do that I expect I would feel like I could do anything. Does that make sense?

Take a step back. What are you really seeking, self-validation? Accept for a moment that you could bang hot women at will right at this moment, how is your life any different? The reality is that you can bang women who you will find highly attractive. I hate the HB number lingo.

Begin with the end in mind. You first came here seeking a way to fix your relationship. What do hou really seek? Know that this is a road you can't go halfway down and do a u-turn. Be clear in your intent, real goal and long term outcome you seek. What you are talking about now, can pretty much blow up that 17 year relationship. If that is what you really want, end it now and game fully. More importantly, that "HB10" you speak of is a woman, a fellow human being, with a life of her own and any actions she takes will come with consequences for her too. Some on here won't give a shit anout that, but realize that there are people in her life.

What are you really seeking? Will you really find what you are looking for by doing what you think you want to? Are the potential consequences to all parties worth the perceived prize?

Agreed. You're at the bar with your 'hb10' and she whispers in your ear she wants to take you home with her, takes your hand up her dress to show you she's wet and says "see why?" You're going to turn away from this? Maybe you are looking to get some action on the side from pua as you've done it in the past. To go white knight for a moment, as the last poster says end the marriage now to be fair to her if that is your intent. Whatever the situation, as the previous poster says go in with a clear objective because he's right - there is no u-turn at a certain point.

I do get your points guys, honestly. End goal.....I'm not sure is the honest truth. We are fixing our relationship (or are trying to) but I don't want to be vulnerable or needy. My theory is that just using PUA (the beginning part, natural approach, conversation, rapport building, little bit of flirting) will build my inner confidence and allow me to project the alpha side of me better, which is what attract women, this includes my wife. Already the dynamics have changed a bit - I have noticed her chasing me a bit more. I don't want her to feel the need to get any attention elsewhere and I don't want to feel that if things go wrong, I don't have the social confidence and experience to get back on the game. Worth pointing out that I'm not talking night game here, just day game - natural, no approaches, just striking up conversations with HB's in the shops etc...

Pmsl, that's never going to happen in a million years

That sort of thing can and does hapoen. Will it ever happen to you, who knows. Some 60%+ of women fantasize about bondage and being dominated in the bedroom. You may want to work on bedroom dominance, like telling her what to do seriously, like a parent and not backing down. Show her you're the man. Save the PUA practice until after you split.