She said "We didnt break up, we just stopped kissing"



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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2014 8:30 am 
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What the hell does that mean? She said she was dating someone else. I typed "broke up" in inverted commas because she said we didnt broke up, but we just stopped kissing and she still loves me.

Here is the whole story in very detail. (it took me 4 hours to type it. if you feel to lazy to read the whole shit at least just scroll down to the break up part)

I met this girls 8/10 a year ago. She seemed very cute but i didnt really like her or maybe it seemed so because of my break up with 9/10 ex. I wanted to get rid of my ex so i started the game with her. Things go very smoothly. We started texting and flirting. A very good escalation when i told her to go with me see the supermoon event together. I start massaging her back siting between my legs. Summer time, june 2013. During the massage i kiss her slowly on the right shoulder to see how she would react. Then i kiss her again at the other one, and then we kiss. Everything goes as it should. After 3 days i leave for going away in us for not being with her for the whole summer. I had some red skeleton sunglasses and she told me if i find some red heart shaped sunglasses, i can bring it to her. We kept texting each other and she kept saying that she misses me and massages and blah blah blah. As soon as i came back, i didnt brought her glasses but 2 romantic/drama books as a gift instead writing something behind the cover making her feel special. She was outside of the country because of some work reasons. I packed the books and go and let them on the table at her office. As soon as she get back, she get the gift and start texting me how grateful she is and cant wait to see me and all that stuff.

We plan to go to a movie(not sure as a date or not). She sees me and give me that hug nobody ever gave me. No holding hands during the movie or any other things like this. Not sure if she still wanted me that way. We kept texting and flirting. We hanged out 3 more times and during these times i tried to give her the goodnight kiss but she rejected me, still about to hug me though but i stepped back saying fuck you to her very playfully. I acted cool and continuing the game. Ask her out in a night picnic. Not doable for her but she stills see me that night. In that weekend she asks me for the picnic. At first i acted like i didnt want to because of the weather but still decided to go. Chatting and getting very intimate, she tells me it was the right time for the kiss i was trying to give her. Now is to late i say smiling, but i give her the kiss after a little awhile.

Since that day, we started dating...or were we? Couldnt see her very often because of her job. She couldnt stop saying things like how funny i am, how a great and awesome person i am and she would have lost if she wouldnt knew me. We still hang out though, going to opera, theater, movies and shit and kept this..you know relationshipy things like kissing, holding hands, touching and shit but unfortunately we never had sex because of the reasons. I start have feelings for her. She knows that i want her and wanna have sex with her she says she is flattered i wanna have sex with her.

Here is what happens after some weeks:

She: we need to stop kissing this year.
Me: lol why so? Im curious
She: because we are not kids
Me: thats not a reasonable explantion
She: nothing's coming out of that?
Me:you dont kiss someone with the hope if something is coming out of that. You just kiss him cuz you feel like kissing him. It sounds like you dont feel like. Im ok with that
She:thats not the case. Just lets not kiss. Were awesome weither ways
Me:if we stop kissing im afraid that, probably the love is gonna fade away. Let there be then! No more kissing
She:no specific reason. Not sure about it, but let's not kiss. And fuck that hormone shit! Im not the bonding type. I dont bond. You may kiss other girls, u owe me nothing
Me: ok i got it
She:you dont get it, but it's ok. I dont really think i wont kiss you, but try i shall. Im not leaving you. You are too important to me to be left behind. Lets try to not to kiss this year, if we make it ok. If we dont make it, we will kiss again and perhaps have sex to celebrate our failure. There is no reason but seriously i dont want that a little detail destroy what we have together. A kiss may ruin a human life oscar wild said
Me :hope these feelings i got for you are not gonna fade away.
She: what feelings?
Me: love i meant. Btw, what about kissing you on the ear or the neck?
She: hhahaha you awesome

After like 4-5 months tells me if i think to have sex with her anytime sooner. I tell her i dont really care about sex as much as i care about her. Meaning that i dont want her feel guilty later on so whenever she is ready about it. We can do it. A month ago she starts being very flaky. She starts ignoring my texts. My feelings for her only starts to grow bigger. Never loose my coolness though. Always kept it flirty and playfully. One night when i was out, i texted her if she get off work early, let me know to walk you home. As soon as she got off, she texted me. I say to her i was waiting for her outside of the building. She says me to go at x club to wait her there. I smelled something is not right here. If i was down the building, why would she want me not to go with her at the club? I didnt say anything though. I said ok and walked to the club.

I chose romantic table with not a lot of people around so that we could have some time together. As soon as she get there, she acts weird. Wants to stay at another table going in the middle of the crowd. Stays on the corner of the couch not close to me. After a chat i take her hand but she takes it off. I say to her whats wrong why you acting this way? She tells me it is just the works stress. Not believing her but i said nothing. I tried to give her a kiss but failed. I walked her home. She was about to hug me but i said to her if there is no kiss for me, there is no hug for you. She insisted and me either. So playfully we just did a handshake. As soon as i get back home, text her "as long as we dont kiss, we shall not hug or handholding. Deal:p ?". She agreed but never had the balls to keep doing that.

She kept acting cold and ignoring me but i kept going like nothing was happening. Ask her for seeing noah, she says she was going in another city to celebrate her birthday with her friends. Not really surprised she didnt invite me, but still i didnt felt good though. I got the tickets with the best seats for an opera we both really love. Still no kissing. During the show i take her hand. She takes it off. I get mad and responding to her with coldness. For her birthday (31 march) i make her a compilation dvd with the songs she love, a romantic book and the famous red heart shaped sunglasses she asked me and she didnt believe i remembered them but i gave her a week later because of the transportation delay. I wanted to give her in person. I texted her i wanted to give smth i should have given her for her birthday. No respond. After an hour with my patience at its peak, i text her again "im so done with you! You can get your present at the front desk and do whatever you want!". She asnwers me after awhile saying she was at home sleeping very sick. She got the gift. She is so glad and about to cry. Swooning and telling me she is very sorry. I text her back after 2 hours. Ignoring her for like 4 days.

the "break up" part
-------------------

Here is were it really starts gets very interesting. We arranged for going to another show, but this time with a friend of her. Since we didnt really have time to be alone during the show. So on my way to opera i stopped by to pick her up so we could have some space and time without her friend. At first i tried to kiss er. She stepped back and gave me just a hug. Then i was joking, teasing and playing around her asking her whu she doesnt kiss me. She smiling said dont want to. I asked her some more times but she didnt answer me. Then i told her unless she is kissing someone else. She said yes. I acted very cool. She says we were not dating during this period of time. I was like...wtf?! She didnt really what to say and saying gibberish like i never asked her for one and blah blah blah. She kept saying that she loves me and i dont know if it is really what she thinks, but she said to me you are much more important to me than being just a simple boyfriend! I wasnt really mad because we were "breaking up". I was mad because she didnt tell me the truth all this time. After this, we had this moment we were saying to each other how important are to our lives. It was such a dramatic moment then we hugged. During the hug i lick and kiss her ear. During the show we didnt even talked. I was so down. I started smiling her during the show a little and get myself in the mood to back being me. At the end we were applauding standing up. She says something to me i cant remember, it was like teasing or something, i slapped her butt so bad. She didnt reacted negatively just continuing applauding smiling. In a moment we three decided to take a selfie with a statue. I stretched my hand secretly for not seeing the friend and was rubbing her had from the back and playing with her hair. She didnt stopped me and still no negative reaction. We went out for a walk. I acted like nothing happened and got back playing and keeping it cool. Joking around, talking about stuff. While we were siting on a bench, i rubbed her back secretly for awhile. Still not a single negative reaction. She hugs me before she leaves as strong as ive never been hugged that strong in my life. As soon as she gets home, she texts me:

She: forgive me? Perhaps not today, but forgive me
Me: (after 30 min) the problem is not that we "broke up" because people break up every day, but the way you said. We had all this time hannging out kissing, handholding and shit. What are these? Dating stuff
She: you are right with regard to the way i said. Im sorry
Me: and the way you have been acting i thought there was something wrong. Im just curious, why did you break up? What happened?
She: i didnt break up. I just stopped kissing you
Me:ok, i didnt find the right term. Why did we stop this relationshipy thing?
She:we just stop kissing. Cant we be?
Me: yeah but..there must be a reason. You told me i never asked you one. Is that because of that?
She:i never thought us as one. Sorry about misleading. (lying)
Me: lol think about it. We would have been a great couple. Dont you think?
She: not as much as great friends. Dont you think?
Me: never as much as both. Dont you think?
She: :) im going to sleep. I hope i havent hurt your feelings. The last i want
Me: look, i really like you. If you never noticed, i alwayus wanted you tobe in a relationship with me and great friends at the same time. Just when my feelings for you were at their peak, you do this. Anyway, i understand. I really appreciate you. You are the woman of actions. I wouldnt like to loose a great person like you either so forget all what happened tonight. I forgive you. We can still hang together as long as im not in friendzone. Ps. After i slapped you today, i realized you have a great butt! lots of other slaps on their way...
She:no friendzone for you. Good night
----

Now here is the point, i got so many scenes in my head for winning her back but i dont have an idea which one is the best for my case. I really have feelings for her and i want her back where we were at happy relationship we had at the beginning or at least just get back to the real ltr with her. How can i win her back? Im thinking of not texting her for like 2 weeks. Not a single contact. She tagged me and her friend for going to a ballet show. Should i go? Or just reject in a soft way like "i dont know, i dont think i can". Also, after these two weeks..should i still hang out with her and act normal just a friend let the flirty playfull funny things in the casual way and keep trying to kiss her?

On the other hand, im wondering if i text her (or say it in person i think it would be better) something like "look, i cant be friends with you. I love you too much. If you and i cant date, we cant be buddies either. The last hug you gave me it was the best of you have ever given to me. So if it is the last one, or the first one of the new beginning it all depends on you. Sorry, but it has to be this way".

Help me bros we all know that feel. What should i do? Its obvious that she still likes me and the best part im not in friendzone.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2014 11:47 am 
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Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2014 10:28 pm
Posts: 150
since you wrote this 4 hours and it looks so, i found this very important for reading it fully and answer it elaborately.
therefore, you made some minor mistakes and two critical.
you just listen her to much , her words became to change your pattern of behavior towards her, because of that you didn't initiate advancement towards sex, she was telling you something and you back off, considered,
instead working towards sex, you put to much attention towards her words, it a fatal mistake, you tried to game her but your game was weak, you were surrendered, from your conversation with her i understand it clearly that you was begging her to let you kiss her ---> first critical mistake
then it came to a very critical mistake, you told her you love her before having sex, from now an on everything screwed up, she understood your set of mind she even told you thanks (you are awesome) for break down before here, from this point and on she started to play with you more intensive game, and she broke you down, and from this location and on you kept screwing up everything, she got you and she started working towards friend zoning you pretty fast,
so you are came more needy, giving her more power, considering her words twice more carefully, so general now she started to keep you on small fire, using you for her needs, just like all girls do sometimes, so generally what she was doing, she was taming you all the scene in the show, giving you the minimum she need to keep you with her, needy as much as she can, from this point she was just doing the same playing with you.
she need this emotions and you provide her, this chasing emotions.

important you to do:
you need first to outgame your self conquer you needs and fears get ready for intensive gaming which you don't need to win anyone you even happy to lose, you need set your mind back on gaming, well it's the easy part.
as you understanding my words and everything i wrote here and before, you need to game here follow this way correctly:
*no ballet, at least twice you reject her invitations before going out again with her, flaking is considered as rejecting, i know she will react as she doesn't care but as you know now she do care and i assure you she does.
at the day of ballet you are taking female friend of yours, it has to be female, to the beach romantic picture in front of the sunset (must), the girl that you like, you must make her jealous, she must see the picture, after the beach, the girl will start asking you where have you been, don't say anything just send here the picture, ignore her comment on the picture, ask her how was the ballet, if she asks you how was at the beach over describe it with joy and happiness feelings, say good night you are tried.
if she isn't instantiating conversation, you can initiate asking her how was the ballet and then if she asks where have you been you post this picture and same pattern as above.
if you can't get into a beach then a bar, if none of these, ask random girl in bars for a picture with you.
from now and on you initiating kino working towards sex, if you punish her grow some nuts and backup you words.

good luck
~Vlad


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2014 6:43 pm 
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Joined: Fri Apr 25, 2014 4:21 am
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First of all, i really appreciate you took your time and read the whole thing and im very thankful for giving a reply with such a great advice!! you wouldnt be more clear!
Quote:
*no ballet, at least twice you reject her invitations before going out again with her.
I have a question. What if she starts to bring another friend of hers whenever we start going out again? How am i supposed to kino escalate? or should i say something that makes her think i wanna go out only with her? or just say it directly?


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 26, 2014 12:45 pm 
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Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2014 10:28 pm
Posts: 150
Quote:
First of all, i really appreciate you took your time and read the whole thing and im very thankful for giving a reply with such a great advice!! you wouldnt be more clear!
Quote:
*no ballet, at least twice you reject her invitations before going out again with her.
I have a question. What if she starts to bring another friend of hers whenever we start going out again? How am i supposed to kino escalate? or should i say something that makes her think i wanna go out only with her? or just say it directly?
simple as that --> you don't go out with her plus another male soul, only girls and you, if that second girl bring her BF/date - accepted, don't push yourself towards friend zone nor using such set of mind, she has this set of mind, therefore she is taking all of you as a friends - back buddies, don't go out with such terms if you can't game her in such circumstances.
you can't get her alone or can't game her with company of dudes/chicks, do your math, either you try to game here in her conditions ruining her Fzone set of mind, which is not that easy, or keep the pressure on her by going out with other girl and stating her (the one you like) that you want to go out alone.


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 26, 2014 2:50 pm 
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Joined: Fri Apr 25, 2014 4:21 am
Posts: 8
Quote:
Quote:
First of all, i really appreciate you took your time and read the whole thing and im very thankful for giving a reply with such a great advice!! you wouldnt be more clear!
Quote:
*no ballet, at least twice you reject her invitations before going out again with her.
I have a question. What if she starts to bring another friend of hers whenever we start going out again? How am i supposed to kino escalate? or should i say something that makes her think i wanna go out only with her? or just say it directly?
simple as that --> you don't go out with her plus another male soul, only girls and you, if that second girl bring her BF/date - accepted, don't push yourself towards friend zone nor using such set of mind, she has this set of mind, therefore she is taking all of you as a friends - back buddies, don't go out with such terms if you can't game her in such circumstances.
you can't get her alone or can't game her with company of dudes/chicks, do your math, either you try to game here in her conditions ruining her Fzone set of mind, which is not that easy, or keep the pressure on her by going out with other girl and stating her (the one you like) that you want to go out alone.
what if we go out just two of us and later on joins another friend of her. should i leave without her noticing i left because of her friend? or i must make it clear why did i leave?


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 26, 2014 3:13 pm 
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Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2014 10:28 pm
Posts: 150
Quote:
what if we go out just two of us and later on joins another friend of her. should i leave without her noticing i left because of her friend? or i must make it clear why did i leave?
if it happened once and you don't feel like you can game her in fort of someone don't leave you can make some comments about other girls, hit on her friend if it's a girl, just game her simply, but next time state you want you both alone, if you still gonna see another friend comes and she acts like it's a coincidence, just leave them, noticeably without anger in very calm way you can even throw a smile to her female friend if there is one.
if she doesn't want only both of you, keep some pressure on her with jealous tactic i told you, ask her how was the party/movie/show, if and when she asks you what have you been doing, just tell her about the female friend of you again, over describe the emotions, you can also post pictures on facebook of you both.
it's should do the work, in case it doesn't help, just dump her, and wait until she contact you, state again you want a date and don't compromise for other things.

good luck
~Vlad


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