(Post Choice) Option attachment:

A woman has two men she must choose from. After a long deliberation over weeks or months, she finally chooses one of the two guys. IMMEDIATELY after she has chosen one of them—and it does not matter which it is—the option she deferred on instantly looks better. She feels like she has "lost" on the guy especially if she invested a lot of time and emotional thought on him. The woman who deliberates too long will feel like "choosing is losing." Her emotional withdrawal will act as "proof" to her that she made the wrong choice. As soon as she has made her decision, the "other" guy will look better than he did immediately before she made her decision to dump him. She will suddenly see him as the more attractive option. This often leads women to consciously or subconsciously sabotage the relationship with the guy that she did choose. The only way to avoid this is for the woman to make her decision quickly, rather than through long deliberation. The more a woman has possessed a man in her mind, the more regret she will experience when it hits her that she has yielded the rights to him. Therefore her emotional response persuades her that she made a terrible mistake. This in part, is the essence of the no contact principle.

Now there are certain women out there who are particularly susceptible to this double bind. These women will run back and forth in their minds between men. They might not technically cheat, but may create a constant flux of break ups and volley between the two men—or perhaps she may be caught in a situation such as that her family disapproves with the guy. Being of the "people pleaser" mentality, she may experience option attachment between winning say, her father's approval and that of her boyfriend. She may feel caught in the middle and all sorts of trouble can result. How does one break such a cycle? How can you liberate a woman once and for all from option attachment in your favor?

Not true at all. This only applies if she's experienced some cognitive dissonance and after making a decision is still unsettled.

If the decision meets her needs she'll likely frame it as the right one without so much as looking back to the other option she'd forgone.

FYI you can't liberate anyone but yourself.

I don't think I emphasized this enough, but this example applies to a situation where both guys or both things she is torn between are perceived as incredibly high value in her eyes where there is no clear "best." And yes, as you mentioned.. cognitive dissonance plays a huge role this type of situation, hence the weeks or months of deliberation I mentioned.

What's your question exactly?

What are some ways to "win" in these situations.