| Hi, I am 18 and I've had a crush on this girl for about a month now, and I am having some problems...
So, in order for you to know who I am, I will be writing some sorta "who i am" currently.
It will be very much appreciated if you could invest some of you time reading it!
I am an AFC, and used to have a bad social circle, which dropped my value so much. (Girls literally did not talk to me at all) Recently, I have invested a lot more money on my wardrobe and I took an extra hour
grooming myself every morning. As a result, I am kind of fusing into a new social circle,
in which people are much more outgoing, sociable and good with women in general. Whenever I am with them, although I feel a little intimidated, since I am not as outgoing as they are, I get a lot more motivation to speak up.
For last few weeks, just as Neil Strauss did, I went crazy on whole pick-up stuff, and I devoted so much of time and money on watching Mystery Methods, Real Social Dynamics, Speed Seduction and Kezia Noble's advice and reading Venusian arts, Gambler's The Natural, The Game and The Art of Seduction. I basically now have a gist of what pickup community is like and how pickup works. But, too much information with lacking experience is becoming a huge problem.
I became MUCH more confident in talking to girls in general, but whenever I am with this girl who I have had crush on for like a month, I FUCKING LOSE EVERYTHING. I'll start with how I INITIALLY STARTED escalating with her. I, for the first time, invited this girl over to my place and a great DHV spike by giving her a cooking lesson (She sucks at cooking, and I am pretty good at it). She smiled, showed LOTS of IOIs and kept a fantastic eye contact with me. I knew that just more push will get me to kiss close with her. Comfort was built, and I knew it was the time I had to move on to seduction.
I realized Gambler's aka non verbal escalation would be great stuff to do by then, but although knowing what to do, I just couldn't! I've never had this kind of experience in my life, and I just could not make the first move! So the night just went off in a boring way. I went to a club with my friends, and she hung out with her bffs. Realizing that I was not able to make a single move made me very depressed and lowered my confidence..
Next week, throughout another week of time, I absorbed even MORE Pickup infos, thinking they might be useful. I went another night to see her, and perhaps to escalate with her. Frustration and lowered confidence were already trapped in my body, and I, again, left the club without success. I relieved myself by giving an excuse that she had to leave early, and that I could have kissed her if she stayed longer. Bullshit.
I know, I know. I did not step out of my comfort zone...but it just seems impossible to turn my brain off and just do it! She knows I like her, and due to my not-having-a-fucking-pair she seems to be repelled a bit..but she definitely has not friendzoned me yet.
I would text her, she would reply for a few times, but wouldn't afterwards. Then i would try to freeze out by neither texting nor talking to her at school...which once worked but not anymore. She did not reply my message yesterday, and I did not want to be seen as needy guy, so I again stopped texting and talking to her for two days now. But I feel something is going drastically wrong.
Now it is bloody awkward for me to initiate talk with her, and honestly it is really giving me an anxiety to walk towards her, although I used to give her a huge bear hugs every day.
I am..just depressed, disappointed by myself being a complete pussy and I don't know man, I am not even sure If I can ever get with girls in the future.
I apologise if the story was too long and emotional, but it will be greatly appreciated if any of you guys can give me some motivation, advice or anything that can help me now..
Cheers, guys.
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