Hi guys,

I'm 20 she's 19. Been together 3.5 years. both at same uni

Long story short - I go to log into facebook today and it says my account has been locked since someone has logged in from an unrecognised location. I click through and it tells me that someone logged in from 'XXXXXX' in Germany.

That's strange I thought - oh wait..... It's the exact same place my girlfriend is with her parents on holiday.

This has happened before (about 1.5 years ago). However that last time I was receiving flirty messages from a girl who fancies me so it made me look like an ass. She got over it and it's been pretty good going since then.

It makes me think: 'How long has she been doing this??' We live very close so it's not going to flag as an unexpected location....

So guys any advice? She is still on holiday - she is back in a few days. I have serious exams coming up? not sure how to handle this.

Throw her in the dungeon and feed her to the rats for breach of trust.

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Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

lol yeah. that could be an option!

You've been in a relationship for 3.5 years, talk to her about it calmly and be understanding if you've got nothing to hide. If someone is insecure and has the chance to snoop, they might not be able to fight the temptation.

It's not cool that she has done it, its up to you if you can forgive her, but don't blow up at her and get real angry.

But then I am a bit of a softy haha

Yeah.. I just am so annoyed by this. 3.5 years and she still can't trust me... damn that sucks...

Any other opinions....

I don't think they're other options. She found dirt before so she's insecure and there's a basis now for her distrust. Not a big deal...she's insecure so just talk to her.

If you love this girl, talk to her about it and reinforce that she can trust you. She could have issues in this regard. I don't thing aggressively confronting her and saying "I cannot believe you have done this! I don't need this shit!" will achieve anything whatsoever.

If a girl had an opportunity to look at my Facebook, I would be a little peeved at it, but I would understand her. Have you honestly never seen your girlfriend's phone unattended and had a moment of curiosity? Even if you've never acted on it.

How about you change your password.

I'm with Neo. Given the history, this isn't a big deal. I would bring it up to her though and tell her you suspect her of it, and tell her that you're worried about it only because she doesn't trust you.

For the record, I would not hide FB from her. Let her have all access if she wants. Her snooping only means she cares. One who doesn't care doesn't waste time or energy snooping. Take it as a sign that she is insecure, but emotionally invested. Ideally when you bring it out in the open she admits to it, you have a good talk, then a good fuck session to seal it all up and you go about your day.