So the original story is that, I hit up this girl that I originally liked in high school but never thought I really had a chance. Read the Game, and decided to man up and go for it in December 2012 (4 years later) since she popped in my head and wondered 'Why the fuck not' Went on a couple of dates, rock climbing, Django, restaurants, until I had to leave for college (i go to school upstate, she goes to school in NYC). Kissed her goodbye and she liked it. Texted me asking why I did it and what we are. Told her its whatever she wanted it to be. Saw her again that night before I left for the bus and just made out and she said she would wait for me.

Fast forward 2 months to my spring break right now. I'm getting ready to take the MCATs next week, so a bit stressed. I wanted to see her, so she came over to my house yesterday. We were watching a movie, till we started making out. Took it to my room, and kept on making out, took off her sweater and her bra eventually. We were groping each other and dry humping. However after breaking down the barriers from face, boobs, back, when I went into her pants, she smiled and me and shook her head no. Made out for a little bit more, then we talked. She started asking me "Why did you contact me out of the blue in December?" and "What if I said no? (to doing it)" and "Why do you like me? I feel like we're moving too fast" Etc. shit tons of shit tests.

It's definitely due to my responses that probably lead to no f-close, so I'm gonna be brutally honest with myself. I told her, that she popped into my head in December and told her that I did kind of liked her in high school and decided to hit her up, since I didn't want to do anything I didn't regret. as to why I liked her, I told her that "Oh you make feel comfortable being the real me etc." and lastly I was like "if you say no, I respect that". "it would be cool if we were boyfriend and girlfriend" and she said she'll think about it. We just made out a bit more and cuddled etc. leaving me with blue balls

Seems like she threw up a lot of LMR and I didn't want to push anything further (don't know if it was right or I was just being chicken) She also said that she does like me, but says I'm too mysterious/ambiguous (Don't know if this is a good or bad thing) I'm probably going to see her 2 more times, once at school and once after my MCATs probably chilling around the NYC downtown area. After that I'm not gonna see her after until May, after our finals and then, I'm leaving for China for about a month, so won't be with her until June.

Let me know on what to be going for when I see her these next 2 times. We probably won't be going to each others houses, since my schedule is packed with seeing other friends before my spring break ends. Definitely some tough love and any input would be appreciated on what to do/say cause I need an objective observer to critique on whether I fucked up or not. I definitely need to learn to be more objective on myself and not so subjective as this skews my critiques and analyses of what I've done so any advice would be great. Thanks y'all.