I'm probably breaking up with her tonight.



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PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 12:36 pm 
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I've been in relationships before, but not as long as this one 2,5 years. My gf is a good girl, she'll never cheat, I never caught her lying to me. She recently gave me a city trip as a surprise. Yet, i'm doubting to break up with her, it feels as a task for me to go meet her. I don't want to have sex with her that often, i used to say, damn, that's my girl. Now i think "She's getting fat". Maybe it's normal after 2,5 years? We used to party alot together. Now i just let her go with her friends, and rather sit home. I was in this situation before, a year ago. The fact that she was postponing to go working, and wanted to work in bars and have a chill year was the big reason for me then. I tought, if she goes working, it will get better. The year is finished now, she plans another chill year.... I'm full of doubts.

It feels like the best for me is to break up, but i would love your opinions


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 5:42 pm 
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Quote:
I've been in relationships before, but not as long as this one 2,5 years. My gf is a good girl, she'll never cheat, I never caught her lying to me. She recently gave me a city trip as a surprise. Yet, i'm doubting to break up with her, it feels as a task for me to go meet her. I don't want to have sex with her that often, i used to say, damn, that's my girl. Now i think "She's getting fat". Maybe it's normal after 2,5 years? We used to party alot together. Now i just let her go with her friends, and rather sit home. I was in this situation before, a year ago. The fact that she was postponing to go working, and wanted to work in bars and have a chill year was the big reason for me then. I tought, if she goes working, it will get better. The year is finished now, she plans another chill year.... I'm full of doubts.

It feels like the best for me is to break up, but i would love your opinions
you already know what you want to do, you are just trying to rationalize it for yourself.

if you're not 100% sure you want to be with her to the point you have to ask us, then you know what the answer is already.

In times of great decisions - flip a coin, in the moment it is in the air, you will know what you want the outcome to be.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:56 am 
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I personally view a LTR as something where the other party does deserve to hear your concerns before you just rock their world and say "peace out". Maybe talk to her about your views?


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:03 am 
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I personally view a LTR as something where the other party does deserve to hear your concerns before you just rock their world and say "peace out". Maybe talk to her about your views?
Some solid true imo. I could see myselft not saying anything though, in case i thought it would just end up delaying the inevitable....

In any case, you sound kinda "meh whatever" about your relationship man....maybe a last thought if its really her the issue before doing anything you might regret? After all you did say she is great...


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 3:48 am 
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I've been in relationships before, but not as long as this one 2,5 years. My gf is a good girl, she'll never cheat, I never caught her lying to me. She recently gave me a city trip as a surprise. Yet, i'm doubting to break up with her, it feels as a task for me to go meet her. I don't want to have sex with her that often, i used to say, damn, that's my girl. Now i think "She's getting fat". Maybe it's normal after 2,5 years? We used to party alot together. Now i just let her go with her friends, and rather sit home. I was in this situation before, a year ago. The fact that she was postponing to go working, and wanted to work in bars and have a chill year was the big reason for me then. I tought, if she goes working, it will get better. The year is finished now, she plans another chill year.... I'm full of doubts.

It feels like the best for me is to break up, but i would love your opinions
As a general rule, people should make a point to look better at the 2.5 year mark, than they did at the start of the relationship. The 2-2.5 year mark is when the endorphins start to drop off in the relationship. It's pretty normal.

Here's something to consider. It's the middle of February. If you aren't getting enough sunlight, it WILL effect your sex drive and how much you feel like partying and socializing. Try going tanning for like 5 minutes (or get one of those crazy sun-lights), then see if your mood / feelings changes at all.

Just my 2 cents.

-Wolf

_________________
Screening: drama-free-relationships-1-screening-vt124827.html
Bad Behavior: drama-free-relationships-3-the-soft-next-vt125554.html


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 02, 2013 8:51 pm 
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Thanks for your input guys.

I didn't break up with her that night, didn't have the chance.

It made me think... It would be unfair to bluntly drop her after this period, without her knowing what is wrong.
So i decided to tackle a stiky point i have, good conversations about feelings.

and made a point doing it.

Talked to her last night, saying everything i had to say. We almost did break up, but in the end we went home together and i feel relieved.

Situation can go 2 ways, 1 it's over soon, 2 it's going to be much better soon.

we'll see...

i'll try the tanning part ;)


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