After one month she mentioned her friend Richard was coming over from England to Australia. Apparently she was in a ltr for three years when she was 16 and her best friend went out with him for the same time. We have been going out now for four months and we have had an awesome time together. But we have also argued and it feels like we are in each others rhythm rather than still in that honeymoon phase. So we are looking at moving in together in January.

She has been in England on holiday for two weeks, whilst her friend is travelling in Asia and when she came back she suddenly seemed really keen to move in together right away. Both of us share our houses and she doesn’t get on that well with her housemate but this situation has been like that for a while. Then I realise she would like a two bed so we have more room and so I can use it as a study as I own my own business.

Richard comes here for one weekend at the end of November and then comes back for longer with his visa for Christmas. My gf has some friends in Sydney and she is going down there with him for a week over New Years, I was invited but I have done Sydney new years twice and now have my own plans.

He is a good looking guy and as she planned this before she met me, my gf said that they were thinking about sharing a place together when he came as she wanted to move out. So my impression was that as they were both single they would be together. She seems to do anything for him, like she brought his laptop back from England for him even though she had loads of luggage and now it seems like she is wanting to get a 2 bed apartment just so that he has a place to stay. And she wanted to take Friday off work just so she can go and meet him at the airport, although I have now convinced her that he can get the train from the airport to the city and meet her at 12pm when she finishes.

She has told all her friends and everyone on Facebook about me so everyone knows we are together. But as Richard is staying in our city it feels like there is the chance for her to choose which guy she likes best. And they already get on and have travelled to the same places, through Asia and then down to Sydney together so I think they will get on well.

As he is staying with her next weekend and over Christmas, she doesn’t want him to stay in the living room as her housemate is really funny about that. But then I said that they can’t sleep in the same room together? As her bf I must be within my rights to not let someone I don’t know sleep next to my gf even if its not in the same bed?

I realised if her friend was female I would not have this feeling but ever since I have known about it I cant shake it. Everything seems to point to her having some sort of feelings for him and I don’t want our relationship to go from just me and her to the three of us suddenly doing everything together, which is what it looks like it will be over Christmas?

So should I stand my ground and not let him stay and he can go stay in a backpackers or should I trust her as if she wanted to cheat on me she would have the chance to anyway and if she did she is probably not the girl for me anyway?

I know this is a long post but any feedback would be appreciated as this is the only stumbling block to an amazing relationship.

SUMMARY: GF wants to have an old guy friend from her teenage years that she seems to really like stay with her, should i let her?

As a PUA what is your opinion?

if i am you, i will tell her exactly what you feel to her. you have to let her know what you feel, but don't expect her will do something make you feel good. She has her right to make the decision, and you have yours. if she choose to do what she want to do with no respect to you. you can leave since relationship base on respect. and you can move on for other girls. She has make her choices. You just stay clam and wait for her responds. if she shows her respect and stay away from those cheating situation, you know you can trust her for farther run with you. She is a big girl, and she know what she is doing. You are a big man, you will respect her decision and stand strong in your core whatever happens, it happens. Be strong man. I am with you on that I feel stronger when I type this. Good luck

First you have to make a decision. You must decide "Am I willing to let her go/lose her?" After you have answered that question, you will know the answer to your question in the OP.

If you are unwilling to lose her, then you will fold and be ok with her seeing this guy for a weekend/week. Accept the fact that they will probably fuck while they are together, and then he will leave and she will be back with you for a while. Just remember once you allow her to do something like this, you have given her all of the power, so she has a green light to mess around on you always!

If you are willing to lose her, tell her you don't approve and why, then ask her if the shoe were on the other foot, how she would feel! If she does not see your point of view or discounts it in any way, then you can simply say "Your shit will be in boxes when you get back, call and I will let you come pick it up!" Hug her neck, and tell her goodbye. Don't look back as you walk away (very important).

I know it is a crappy situation, but you know you can overcome it! 4.2 Billion other girls out there.

Peace...

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Crypto...
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All girl's are Freaks...It is your job to bring it out in them! - Crypto

You need to stop bending over and letting her ass fuck your brain! - Heywood

You need to talk to her about how you really feel about the whole situation- not comfortable to do but you have to.

Anyway, if the girl is into you things will go the other way and work in your favor.

Million fish in the ocean, you might discover a new specie...

This is one of those moments where you set your boundaries! However there are certain ways of doing this that will get better results (assuming she likes you more than him).

The guy above is correct! If its bothering you and it's stepping on your boundaries then you need to talk openly, maturely and calmly with her. Don't tell her what you want her to do but instead explain how this whole situation makes you feel! Explain to her that its a situation that you would not put her in due to your boundaries and you would hope to be treated the same. Emphasise that it's her decision.

If she asks what you would do if she went ahead with her plans, don't give a straight answer! Just say that you would need some time to think about things.

Two outcomes will happen but give her time to make a decision!

1 she sides with you because she values what you have more than what she has with him.

2 she sides with him.

If its number 2 then I'd say I need some time to think about stuff! Freeze her out for a week to see her reaction. If her mind still doesn't change then I'd move on. It's simply a matter of both your boundaries being incomparable for the future.

Ps do this before the dude arrives and flights are booked ect...

To GTDave, thanks for the advice I think it was absolutely spot on. I wish i had seen it before i spoke to her, but I wanted to let her know how i felt about it so we had the chat. I essentially said the same principles but in a far less concise way and i wish i did but i didnt mention that its a situation i would put her in as i think that bit of advice is gold.

Anyway she went all quiet on me and the next day she said that he won't stay with her and that he can find somewhere else to stay. But i went all AFC on hearing this and before i could even think about what i was saying, i said I felt bad and its fine he can stay but only for two weeks, while he finds his own place to stay. So now he gets here at Christmas and he has to be out by 7th Jan.

I am hitting my head against the wall as i did everything right and then ballsed it up, right at the end play. Anyway she says she has told him this and he has all his flights booked. So next weekend when he comes for two days should be interesting, any tips on how to play it?

I don't want to seem overly protective but at the same time I need him to know who she is with? Or should i forget about him and just make sure she has a good time whenever she is with me??