So been seeing hb8 for a while but havent fucked, we talked about it rarely and said how much we'd like to do it, she's classy.

how do i get her to have sex?

we kiss alot and all that shit but i wanna start doin more shit.

ps never had this problem with a girl before


i have been having inner game issues which i need to sort out, basically a fear of losing her because she is a great catch.

How do I get over the fear of losing her? I feel like I'm trying to force a relationship out of her? I don't want to be like this...I can sense it turning her off slightly...

Plus how do you know if she likes you?

Careful brother, my best friend has this issue and it's why he is still single

after three years from his last LTR. The first problem: simple they call it one-idis.

this girl has become the center of your brain and you are already putting her over

yourself. Now I will admit I love being in love...there is nothing like having a

woman who is just so special to you, but for both of you, you can not put her

over your own needs. Keep going to the gym. Hang out with your friends, just don't

go overboard and act like you hang the stars. show her she is special when she does something good unless it's all the time. sometimes you gotta take time to back-off though.

Problem number two: You act like sex is going to bring in the relationship. True
story here. This very sexy girl wanted me one time... she told me a beautiful story about wanting a real man and how he was going to leave her ex...blah blah blah. We had sex and then she was gone.
The morale: sex doesn't promise a relationship.

The girl is talking about sex with you so she is interested. take it slow and stop pushing the relationship card if she's not taking it yet. Just play it cool and have fun with the girl, do keep things sexual and I'm sure if she's worth your time (notice i said if she is worth your time) things will play out the way you want them to.

how do you get over the fear..... this isn't long term yet you're just starting with the girl! best thing for you bud is to HAVE OTHER OPTIONS

Hard to say exactly what you have to do, but you could try some different techniques like LMR etc. Also if you sexually escalate alot and she still doesn't want to have sex, just shake her off and say that she's boring. Get her working for you again, and she will definitely go further than before because she want to prove herself for you. Also as the others are saying, don't overthink about her. Meet other girls just to get her off your mind a little bit

Thanks ghoys.

You need to open yourself up to other options. Not by cheating on her, you just need to accept that she is not the only Great catch in the world. You only think this due to post hoc rationalization. In other words,

You see a pretty girl ==> You talk to her ==> because you already like her, you see all of her "hobbies" and "personality traits" under a positive light ==> You think she's a great catch

It happens with almost every girl, this is how pedestalization/ Oneitis starts. It feeds off of your desperation, you begin to question "will I find another girl like this?" Yes, you will, but not with that mentality. Poon is counter-intuitive, the more you're desperate for it, the more it avoids you. To truly own a girl, you must be willing to leave her.

As for the secks part, you need to indirectly pressure her into it. I know that sounds terribly wrong, but it's because men pursuing their own motives has been reduced into a taboo via social conditioning. You're a man, you want secks, there's nothing wrong with that. If you can't get it from her, find someone else you can get it from.

Now, by pressuring her, I don't mean directly. Never OVERTLY communicate your interest in her or your need for something, as you'll only make her resent you. It needs to be within the subtext of your relationship. She needs to think almost subconsciously,

"If I don't have secks, will he leave me?"

If a girl thinks you're so desperate and dependent on her that you won't leave her for anything, why would she reciprocate your advances? She can monopolize your attention without giving you anything in return. This is how women establish beta orbiters. There must be a driving force for progress, your relationship must be saturated with sexual tension and the high-octane emotions of being in love.

Kill your desperation.

_________________
My Blog: www.solvemygirlproblems.com

Haha well said Hakuna, solid advice. You're right. Since I've written this I've gotten over the oneitis spell and am playing the cards right with this same girl. Being less available, and genuinly am willing to walk at any given time etc. + she can see other girls tryna flirt with me on fb etc etc.

buy one of those homemedics personal massagers from walmart for like 5 bucks. give her a massage with it and accidentally drop it down "there" while she is laying on the bed or whatever. i did this to my gf and she took it from me. at first i thought it was because she was uncomfortable with it and that's even what she told me, but recently she told me she was using it on herself and laughed off an apology to me for lieing. she attributes that to being when she came out of her shell sexually towards me. she said it left her wanting more.